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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to not want DD to read Twilight..

101 replies

LelloLorry · 01/11/2010 20:10

DD2 has been asking for me to buy her the Twilight books for some weeks since her friends are reading them, but tbh, I really don't want her to read this.

I decided to see what it was about though when I searched here a few weeks ago and discovered fans of the series called themselves twilight sluts, I immediately thought 'Hell no!' and left it at that.

DD2s friends gave her a book today and I banned Twilight from the house .
Thinking now I might have overreacted, and really need to see exactly what this book is about.
Advice please?

OP posts:

pigsinmud · 01/11/2010 22:55

Yabu. My 10 year old ds2 has just started reading it. There is nothing in it to cause any concern. I have read the first 2 books.

fedupofnamechanging · 01/11/2010 22:59

By that age I had read Lace, the works of Jackie Collins, the Thorn Birds and more Mills&Boon than I care to remember.

If your DD is only reading Twilight, be grateful. It could be a lot worse. I think my mum would have a fit if she knew what I'd read as a young teen.

seeker · 01/11/2010 23:05

They are badly written, formulaic, anti feminist crap. The basic message is that women should reconstruct themselves to fit a man's vision. But I suspect that's not why you don;t want your daughter to read them!

didgeridoo · 01/11/2010 23:10

My dd is 12 & has read the whole series. I looked into how suitable they were & held off for a while. When I finally allowed her to read them, the parts I had been worried about eg Edward being very possessive of Bella, actually provided a good opportunity to discuss what a healthy relationship is/isn't. My friend told me they weren't suitable for girls of mine & her dd2's age & then a few minutes later her dd1 walked in & announced that her younger sister had already read them!

DancingHippoOnAcid · 01/11/2010 23:32

Let her read them.

She will see for herself how boring the characters are and will quickly lose interest.

My DD (11) read the whole series, saw the first 2 films, then got totally bored with the whole thing and decided she could not bear to sit through the last film - thankfully as I would probably have had to have sat through it too!

Ban them and she will obsess about them for years.

Valpollicella · 01/11/2010 23:37

Read them yourself (trust me, even if you work full time and come back to a house of 18 kids, you'll still be able to get through one of the books in a couple of days) and then let her read them.

Then address Bella's utter patheticness (it will annoy you!) with her and let the conversation flow from then on

SGB's suggestions are great ones btw

Stinkyoldclottedcatspus · 01/11/2010 23:49

I wouldn't ban them, but like others have said, I would discuss with her the ways which it sets a bad example. Edward is seriously stalkerish and controlling. Bella is a fool.
Other than that, they are seriously boring. Nothing happens, and as a serious vampire fan I find the whole thing laughable. Fgs, they sparkle!!
I'm not sure I agree with others on letting a 12 year old read charlaine Harris though. They are good, and there isn't that much sex, but there is enough to make me about giving them to a child. And in places they are quite gory. (good though)

Kaloki · 02/11/2010 00:33

I was reading Stephen King by that age

However I think the Twilight books would "mysteriously" vanish if they ever entered my house, because I am a book snob. Well, now anyway.

BongoWinslow · 02/11/2010 00:50

Agree with everyone who says let her read them - they are stunningly boring and stupid, but yep I'd have loved them at 12. Bella is utterly annoying.

But I'm a bit surprised at suggestions she read Charlaine Harris - some parts of those books are much racier than anything in Twilight - what about Eric/Sookie shower scene in Dead to the World (I think) - not sure I'd want my 12 yo reading that (though I would have hidden it under my pillow and read it repeatedly if Id got my hands on it as a 12 yo ). As most people have said, we all read stuff that might have been a bit old for us when we were kids and we're all fine. I think she'd be more harmed by having a book banned.

Kaloki · 02/11/2010 00:53

Actually thinking about it, mum banned me from reading Stephen King.. I became much more determined. And much sneakier.

Cammelia · 02/11/2010 01:04

My dd read the first one of the Twilight books and decided for herself how badly written it was and chose not to read the rest of the series. Result.

BongoWinslow · 02/11/2010 04:51

Meant to add that one of my strongest happy memories is of me trying to shock my mother by telling her I was reading Lady Chatterly's Lover when I was about 12 and her just laughing and teasing me for reading 'rude books'. I remember very strongly knowing that nothing was banned, I could read anything I came across and as a result reading with a deep sense of freedom. This was really important to me growing up.

I also agree that she'll read them anyway. Despite her free-thinking views on reading, my mum banned bubble gum. Just meant my friends brought it to school for me... At least if it's out in the open you can discuss them with her, which might end up being a really important discussion about some of the points people have made on this thread.

MotherofHobbit · 02/11/2010 05:10

I wouldn't want my DD to read them either. Edward is creepily possessive in the name of true love and 'protecting her'. Not good role models for a healthy relationship.

That said, it's still a fun read if you can overlook the creepiness and teenage angst.

Unfortunately, your DD is probably going to read it anyway if she really wants to. It's popularity is so pervasive it'll be hard to avoid it completely.
I'd suggest letting her read it, but also read it yourself and then discuss with her.

YunoNotToReturnToALitFirework · 02/11/2010 05:20

I find it a bit bizarre that you would rightously ban your daughter from reading something, while delighting in the fact that you know nothing about it. How is that going to help her deal with the (hypothetical) issues that you object to? (Hypothetical because you have no idea what you are actually objecting to).

You happen to be right; Twilight is a pile of monkey toss. Why not equip your daughter to make her own criticisms of the books?

drfayray · 02/11/2010 06:19

I read Twilight (I like knowing the currency as I have a DD 12 and a DS 15) but what a pile of twaddle. Never will get that time back .

YABU for this book ban. I do not believe in that. I was allowed to read whatever I wanted and remember wonderful times when the 'hot' books were passed around in class.

She will read them anyway. I know I would have done so.

chocolatestar · 02/11/2010 06:26

I have issues with the way the book presents relationships. I would let her read them but read them too and then talk to her about them. They are awful but she will probably love them.

mummytime · 02/11/2010 06:38

My 12 year old is reading them (but seems to be running out of steam actually). One other thing you could mention is that the writer is a Mormon, I do see shades of Mormon world view peeking through (how would you not love someone who is that devoted to you, as in the werewolves).

The Americans do seem to have a thing about boyfriends climbing in through bedroom windows don't they? I have seen it in lots of TV and film.

If you ban something it makes it more attractive.

nooka · 02/11/2010 07:03

My dd (just turned 10) read them, and so did I. I thought that they were very readable crap. Bella is very feeble, but does get better as she goes along, and then is ridiculously 'gifted' as a vampire (oh and vampires are ludicrously wonderful too). The sex is minimal, but dd did love the kissing. She also thinks that teenagers are a different species, and agreed that Bella was very feeble and a poor role model, but "Muuum, she's a teenager". I think I'd be more concerned about an actual teenager reading them, because they really might think that it's a real and desirable model for a relationship. I had fun teasing dd about how totally unattractive Edward was and how it was obvious Bella should have gone with Jake (I like tall, dark and handsome personally). The Mormon connection is interesting.

NerdyFace · 02/11/2010 08:09

If you actually think about the twilight books, not only do they encourage Underage/Illegal sex they also encourage Necrophilia.

Edward is a 100yr old DEAD MAN who has a semi-sexual relationship with a 17yr old girl.
Which in America where the books are set is Illegal.

Also the books are thinly veild Absintence propaganda, Mormon nonsense.

They are also incredable badly written, pathetically developed and almost moronically bad. It's the worst kind of throw-away nonsense that seems to pass for books now-a-days.

There is only ONE vampire book and that is "Bram Stokers - Dracula" Fuck twilight, fuck true blood, it's all shit dressed up as "Literature" buy her "Dracula" and save her soul!

TrillianAstra · 02/11/2010 08:50

Nerdyface - she is 18 and they are married before anything more than rather chaste kissing happens.

And in the state of Washington (and in the UK) the age of consent is 16.

Abstinence propaganda yes - encouraging illegal/underage sex really really not.

TrillianAstra · 02/11/2010 08:51

Oh, and LOL at vampire books promoting necrophilia

NerdyFace · 02/11/2010 08:51

Allright, i had no idea what state it was set in, so i renage on that point.

Still Necrophilia though isn't it?..Considering he is Technically dead?

TrillianAstra · 02/11/2010 08:54

Even if you didn't know the state - it's not illegal to kiss a 17 year old.

And if vampires were real and known to the law then I think the laws on necrophilia would have to be revised - or the vampires would have to be defined as 'not a dead body'. Even so, if he is dead and it is necrophilia it is she who is committing a crime, not him.

NerdyFace · 02/11/2010 09:02

Regardless of ALL of this, the point is the books are awfully written and full of pretty crappy things which have allready been mentioned, they really are bad books!!

And while i very much doubt they would have any negative impact on anyone just be reading them, there will be nothing positive either! OP your daugther will gain nothing by reading a set of books which have no value, substance or message!

It is throwaway literature.

And to be honest, the Necrophilic/Underage sex arguement is just something that winds my twi-hard sister up something rotten, my main and REAL problem with the books is the pathetic nature of the writing and the author

TrillianAstra · 02/11/2010 09:10

Your twi-hard sister clearly hasn't been practising her debating skills on AIBU

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