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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To take my ds aged 22 months trick or treating

103 replies

YummyorSlummy · 29/10/2010 20:00

Even though he can't say 'trick or treat'? Not sure whether to go or wait until next year and just let him answer the door instead. So please can you all tell me what to do?!

OP posts:

Mamumu · 29/10/2010 20:39

I'm beginning to feel concerned myself. Would you say 3 is too young as well? I plan to let her eat just a couple of sweets and keep the rest "for later" (later being 'who knows when')

Ragwort · 29/10/2010 20:43

I can see that some children think it is fun, and I am happy to give out a few quid's worth of sweets but I still believe it is begging and I really don't want my DS to go round knocking on doors just to get a few sweets when he can have as many as he wants at home - I am not the sweet police .

But why do adults think it is 'fun' ???

cherrybea · 29/10/2010 20:44

Mamumu - whereabouts are you, cos they're all welcome here, not sure why it's an issue. [hhmm]

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 29/10/2010 21:01

It is fun - us adults have been children who have enjoyed guising, and love seeing this generation doing the same thing. I wouldn't want my children going to strangers' doors though, just as we weren't allowed to when we were young.

Mamumu · 29/10/2010 21:04

@Ragwort, same goes for adults! We could stay in and have as many drinks as we wanted at home - still, it's more fun to go out ;-)

OK, maybe not the best example, but I don't think it's just about sweets. I think it's about interacting with your neighbours... the thrill of staying up late, the desguises, the decorations... do I really need to explain it?

@cherrybea SW London, so quite child-friendly (I hope)

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/10/2010 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mamumu · 29/10/2010 21:11

Thanks! :-)

thefirstmrsDeVeerie · 29/10/2010 21:12

I take all my little one but my teenager has not been allowed to go for a few years. I think he would be intimidating (even though he isnt) and its silly for a teenager to ask for sweets.

I have to admit I was a bit [hhmm] about it (I am 43 so that may have something to do with it]. DD loved it and when she died I had to sort of decide to totally ignore it or go over the top. As I had other children I went for over the top and deck out my house in loads of hidious plastic tat. The kids get all dressed up and have a grand time.

You wanna see the state of my place at Christmas

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/10/2010 21:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alfabetty · 29/10/2010 21:15

Our American neighbours have twins that they have brought t&ting since they were 18 months. Very cute.

A little child can pick up on the excitement and being out when it's dark (6 o'clock!).

I don't see that an older child gets any more out of it than a younger one - just different.

It's not begging, just as giving a birthday gift isn't a donation. It's just part of social interaction and local custom.

thefirstmrsDeVeerie · 29/10/2010 21:16

I have ordered a resin, Father Christmas, musical house from Avon. PMSL its hidious!

slipperandpjsmum · 29/10/2010 21:18

I also have been shocked by so many negative responses but we are lucky and live in a lovely area where the majority of people are very friendly. The time and effort people go to decorating their houses (some of whom don't even have children) and put scary music on when they open the door. We all dress up parents and children and have a wonderful wonderful time, as do the people we call at year after year. Then its all back to whos ever turn it is to have the party that year for nibbles. We do not knock at houses who do not have a pumpkin or decorations. We give away more treats than we receive and everyone goes to alot of time and effort to make it a really fun night. We have a real community spirit within our area, know all our neighbours and they know us and we see it as a way for all generations to come together for a bit of fun!!!!

cherrybea · 29/10/2010 21:23

Mamumu - I'm a bit far away to go with you :o but it sounds like a lot of people would be happy to see a little one out and about.

Is it not like saying he would be too little to go to Santa's grotto because he wouldn't understand. [hhmm]

lovechoc · 29/10/2010 21:24

I have two DC and they won't be going guising if I can help it (we don't call it trick or treating here).

YABU to be going out with a toddler at night when the weather is so cold and dark.

ilovesooty · 29/10/2010 21:27

I don't want people knocking on my door and disturbing me full stop. I don't really care how old they are.

lovechoc · 29/10/2010 21:28

If we don't want disturbed we just switch all the lights out and pretend no one is home. Easy way to avoid getting guisers at the door really.

pigletmania · 29/10/2010 21:29

I would not take him, he is too young, if you were going with your older children fair enough, but just you and your ds, no. Wait till he is a couple of years older, more fun that way.

ilovesooty · 29/10/2010 21:32

The year before last I got abused by a teenager who took a child out with him and kept knocking and shouting for an hour. I had to sit in the dark after that for quite some time. Last year I went away to avoid it.

I think it's only acceptable in close knit neighbourhoods where you know the people who are knocking on the door.

KnittingisbetterthanTherapy · 29/10/2010 21:39

I'm also stunned at some of the comments on here. I think it's total nonsense to call it begging, it's done in a completely different spirit. Our local community displays pumpkins if they want to be part of the fun (and for us it is) and it's a lovely way to meet people and chat to your neighbours.

Our American friend organises a party for the kids and then we go out for about 30 mins to a few local houses - DS1 was 16mths last year and wasn't remotely interested in the sweets, he just wanted to smile at everyone and enjoyed all the attention.

Our local police also have downloadable posters that you can put up if you don't want to be disturbed.

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/10/2010 21:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ilovesooty · 29/10/2010 21:41

I did call the police, on the non urgent number. They told me to turn the lights off and sit upstairs in the dark, which I did.

ilovesooty · 29/10/2010 21:44

There are no posters on our local police website and the police state that unless there is actual damage/vandalism they won't get involved.

Back to the OP, I think that's very young, but the issue really is as much whether you know your neighbours too, I think.

FlyingInTheCLouds · 29/10/2010 21:44

plebby - ffs - I hate mn sometimes. Bluxeur, seriously you are a snob beyond a snob.

FlyingInTheCLouds · 29/10/2010 21:45

what a bunch of misery guts.

RockBat · 29/10/2010 21:46

Why should a person have to sit in the dark in your own home just because they're frightened of what someone is going to do to their house? That's not right, is it? That's madness and one of the reasons I hate trick or treating.

And as for taking a 22 month old out...bonkers. Why don't you dress up yourself and go out if you're that desperate. It's not about your son at all, he won't give a toss.

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