AIBU or is this unusual?

[Mushroomflumps]

I'm not judging any one else's parenting - I am not saying my parenting style is right and others are wrong.

I took out some children for lunch, said 'Who wants to go to McDonalds?', expecting a 'Yay' for a treat, and got from one of the children 'What's Mcdonalds?'

I wouldn't of been surprised if any child ever said to me 'I'm not allowed Mcdonalds', or 'Never been to McDonalds'.

But not 'what's mcdonalds?'

AIBU to think this is unusual, or is this common, and just not for my common kids

Pisces - you are assuming i care about McD's when I really don't
I would not however go out of my way to tell my kids what goes on there

agree maryz

I didn't say that they should go in, but just that they should know what it is.
I work with a young man, in his late 20's now, and he had a very sheltered childhood, he tells some very funny stories about the things his parents wouldn't let him do (he certainly never set foot in McDonalds)everyone laughs-so does he -but I get the sense that it was very hard for him as a child and he won't put his DCs in such a position.
It can be hard to be the only one who doesn't know something. I remember when my DS1 was about 6yrs old and they did a graph of favourite TV programmes at school he came home almost in tears because he hadn't heard of most of them. There were only the 2 of us, and we didn't watch much TV. I said to tell me what he wanted to watch and we could try it but I was entirely missing the point-he felt he should know popular culture. While I didn't think that he needed it in the least,and it wouldn't have changed our viewing habits, I felt that I had been a bit remiss in the fact that he didn't know.
I like them to make up their own mind. He found he hadn't missed anything on TV and he still doesn't watch much now. In the same way that they went to McDonalds occasionally and they now wouldn't choose to go.
My nephews are HEed and the one who mixes best socially is the one who has always managed to keep abreast of popular culture. It eases the path-whether they choose to follow it is up to them, but it is better to know IMO.
I think that my job is to make them strong enough to follow their own opinions, regardless of others. For that reason , although surprised that they dodn't know what McDonalds is, I think it a step better than parroting mummy's opinion.

It's unusual, but if a child doesn't watch much TV, or doesn't watch much TV with adverts on - they might have missed being endlessly exposed to Ronald McDonald et al. I've taught at least one kid who only watched TV selectively, had never been to Macdonalds and similar. Absolutely delightful, confident, articulate child who didn't have social problems with her peers - probably because she had the confidence at quite a young age to be different - I imagine some might have struggled with it though.

On the whole though it crops up a lot when you're doing M in phonics... the kids all pipe up "oh that's for Macdonalds that is."

Surprise - I turned around in a teenage strop once and accused my mother of giving me a deprived childhood because I'd never had a Pot Noodle! Once I'd eaten one - I understood I'd had a bloody lucky escape.

notanotter - you may HE your DCs but if you don't and they don't know what McDonalds is (and I don't mean that they have to eat there) then they are likely to be ridiculed at school the first time its mentioned and they say "What's that?"

It doesn't seem fair to deliberately try to shield them from even being aware of things.

Like pisces my DCs don't watch any childrens tv (ceebebies or whatever) but they would be aware of the characters and be able to join in a conversation at school that involved recognising Ben10 without feeling the need to watch it and knowing the name of extremely popular and ubiqutious eateries would fall into the same categories.

We go to McDonalds occasionally as they can be a livesaver in a busy world with lots of activities and sometimes not enough time to go home and eat. Trying to avoid something may turn it into forbiddeb fruit,

I am glad that you understand my point Iborolass-I am not suggesting for a minute that you have to do it, just that it isn't fair to keep a DC in complete ignorance because you don't like it. It is so much simpler for the child to have the choice and be able to talk about if they wish.
I don't watch Big Brother, XFactor, East Enders, Strictly Come Dancing etc but I know enough about them to discuss them, even if only to say why I don't watch them. I would feel at a distinct disadvantage if I had never heard of them. It is a lack of general knowledge if anything else.
For example a 9 or 10 yr old DC would be at a disadvantage if writing a persuasive argument against fast food restaurants, or a discussion document with the arguments for and against fast food restaurants in a town, if he had never heard of them.
It is general knowledge to know about all sorts of things that you don't do. I eat meat, and am quite happy to do so, but I would expect a 9yr old to understand that some people don't and their reasons and respect them.

How do I know which areas of popular culture (that I might know little about myself) I need to teach DD about so she doesn't get "ridiculed at school" then?
Jedward? Mario? Colonel Sanders?
Is there a list?

It's funny what's important to some people.

Good question paisley, I don't think you can give a definative list as it will depend on what's popular when your DD starts school (if she hasn't already).

I guess McD's and Tv characters will always be on there and then as they get older stuff like X Factor and video games.

To me it isn't a question of what's important at all but just helping smooth your child's path in school. Just as you wouldn't want to send them in clothes that might be mocked by other children I want to send mine at least being able to join in with their peers.

As it happens most popular culture passes my DCs by, as I said above we don't really watch TV, but it doesn't mean that I want them to stand out as being weird in any way.

Interestingly I'm not actually sure who you mean by Mario on your list of suggestions (is it the Mario Kart character?), it just illustrates that people have different life experiences but popular culture binds us together and having a working knowledge of it is a must for a child in my view.

Duh Don't you even know who SuperMario is?
Loser.

Kidding .
But who's to know what it is that children are going to get ridiculed for. There's just so much of this trivial stuff.

You see paisley I completely agree with you that it is trivial but is that in itself a reason to try and keep the knowledge from your children ?

There is no right answer, we can only do what we think is best and for me I'm happy to tell my DCs about stuff that ordinarily wouldn't be part of their lives to help them slong at school.

Just thought of another one - I can't stand The Simpsons but all my DCs friends seem to watch it so although they won't be seeing it at home they know some of the characters so they don't feel left out in the playground.

none of you seem to think that 'that's life'
don't know what super mario or macdonalds is ? - someone might jeer - no biggie really though is it?

you can't wrap kids up in cotton wool forever - there's stuff the 'supermario ignoramus' will know that the supermario whizz will not

my belief is to teach your child how unimportant such stuff is and shrug it off

kids all over the place are so different to one another - i don't buy the homogeneity (?) argument to 'fit in' Kids will be bullied or not for the most bizarre of reasons - i try to teach mine the water off a ducks back approach

The world would be a much duller place were we all the same

It isn't a question of bullying-it is just a question of fitting into your generation-even if you keep your DCs apart- they have to fit in and get on with their peers eventually.
The young man that I spoke of earlier was telling us about his upbringing because he didn't have the common background that everyone else his age had and took for granted, he felt the loser.
It is the little things that matter, if it is a non uniform day at school and all DDs will be wearing trousers it isn't fair to say that your DD must wear a smocked dress and tights and that she must shrug it off. (If she wants to wear the smocked dress then that is entirely different).
It is life, whether we like it not, and to make a stand against it at the expense of your DC doesn't seem fair. If they want to make a stand, based on knowing all the evidence (and many do)that is entirely different.
I believe in helping mine-not just giving my opinion and expecting them to agree.
McDonalds is general knowledge-and they can't write the persuasive letter against, if asked to in literacy, if they don't know what it is and would feel disadvantaged.
My HEed nephew will always get on well in life, because despite living in the middle of nowhere, without a TV and visits to McDonald, he keeps well abreast of popular culture for his generation. I'm not too sure how he does it-but he manages to be fairly streetwise-a skill they all need IMO. (it is nothing to do with bullying).
I am proud of mine because they don't follow the crowd but they didn't get to 9yrs old without knowing what McDonalds was-they even went in occasionally-it wasn't a big deal. It meant that when they went in with friends they knew what to order.

Pisces mum - you make the '9 year old to whom we all allude' sound awfully intuitive

my kids just bungle along - they are definitely different because of some things we do at home but not so you'd know... None school uniform day - they'd look as trendy as the next bloke Your he'd nephew might be taught about popular 'culture' if his parents think it is relevant ...surely this whole argument is subjective?

I do not home ed - nor do i make life choices that i believe could do anything but benefit my children .... the choices which i may make for them - i generally do with a long term view

I don't want them to think that differences matter - in the long run and only IMO they really don't

I have older children and they are bizarrely confident and popular despite mine and dps parenting. Bloody opinionated too Piscesmum - why are you intent on presuming I have meek - smock dressed weirdos for children?

'It meant that when they went in with friends they knew what to order.'

Most kids know what chips and burger are ...even mine.

I didn't want to - but I just succumbed and asked DS7 what McD's was he said ' i love it - it's that place they sell chips' There - do I pass your parenting test?

' why are you intent on presuming I have meek - smock dressed weirdos for children?'

Wherever did you surmise that?!!!

Yes, you do pass if he knows what it is!

I would expect a 9 yr old to be able to have opinions on fast food restaurants and their ompact on the environment-not something they can possibly do if they don't know what a fast food restaurant is.

My mother was rather 'don't have to follow the crowd-shrug it off' and I can tell you that it doesn't make childhood easy (and I was never bullied-you just feel at a disadvantage). I always vowed that I would let mine follow the trend, if they wanted to.

I think that they will get invited by friends to McDonalds or similar, even if you don't go yourself-unless you vet all friendships.

An example of the sheltered young man I mentioned was that he wanted to watch 'Neighbours' as a teenager. After a lot of discussion, his parents agreed to 'watch it as a family' and discuss it and see whether it was suitable. It was so cringeworthy to him that he gave up the effort. I find it sad, because they are lovely people(I met them once), so is he, but their relationship is very superficial-he just doesn't tell them anything important in his life.

'I have older children and they are bizarrely confident and popular despite mine and dps parenting'

So are mine. They are old enough to know that whatever I did was fine and they went to MacDonalds-with no ill effects!

my DS is 7 and he found out about McD last year. We don't eat meat, so we went for a try and had the fries and bread with the pretend cheese only. He hated the food, but he still wants to go sometimes because of the plastic toy he gets. And so, we go once every 3 months or so, and come out hungry but carrying a piece of tat.

I didn't try a Pot Noodle til I was 17

I always felt sorry for one of my classmates in primary school - his parents would pack him a McD when we were on school trips.

Unfortunately ds has allergies. McD is one of the few readily available places that he can eat if we are out

My children (4 and 2) have never been to McDonalds and wouldn't know what it is. We are vegetarian and they are lactose intolerant, so I doubt there is anything there that they can eat even if we wanted to, so the topic just hasn't come up yet.

There are lots of other things they don't know about too, it is not a conscious vegetarian attempt to suppress the knowledge

I have never had a Pot Noodle! I am pleased that DS only asked the once and doesn't even get them as a student. I still think it was a good idea to buy him one when he asked.

I think it is fair enough not to know at pre school age-it is just another matter entirely not to have noticed by 9yrs of age-unobservant and unquestioning.