to be really annoyed at H

[domeafavour]

he is away for the weekend, boys piss up.He left at 5am yesterday, just realised I didn't know what time he got back today,so text him, his flight gets in at 7pm!!I thought at least it would be midday or early afternoon
That's the entire weekend he won't see DS.

Now this is on top of a 10 day work trip, on top of a 3night work trip.

Also DS been poorly all week, I now feel like death warmed up, and DS is really playing up cos he is sick of being inside. I have no-one else to help

Our marriage was hanging on by a thread, I think it just snapped

Oh dear

When he gets back, have a bag packed ready, and go to your mum's for a couple of days.

No you are not. No idea why some men feel it is acceptable to treat their wives with such lack of care and respect.
Agree with colditz- get away for a bit.

YANBU but you should have checked...I probably have NO pity as my DH has been working abroad for the last three months. Has not seen the DCs for that long except on Skype. Keep it in perspective. He WILL be back.

The timing's crap - i guess he can't help the work trip and presumably the lad's wkend was booked a while back? Also you and DS being ill couldn't have been predicted. Probably not worth having a huge fall out about itc - instead play it cool, and get urself booked into a spa for the weekend sometime soon.

i did ask him, he muttered something about not being sure, which is just nonsense cos he is so particular about his flights. He knew about the work trips when he booked this flight.
i just feel so bloody alone. And work takes up so much of his time. We will be lucky if we see him this week either.
And DS cries for him, when he gets upset he says I want my daddy, it's really sad.

My dp has to work away too, 4 nights a week every week, but I know how much he would rather be here with me. Is that the case with you?
Why not let ds stay awake a bit longer to see his daddy and be read a story etc?
I'm guessing there's a bit more to this than just the beig away though?

he says all the right things, and gets upset about not seeing us.
But all he does is talk about work, even for the couple of hours a night he is home.
Ok, it seems to have been particularly stressful recently, and we have talked about it, but I am just coming to the end of my patience.
And I'm bored and lonely.

he just phoned and was suitably apologetic.
I'm never sick, I feel dreadful

So he's about to go away again for work? 3 days or 10?
And if you're ill? I mean, really ill, as in not able to function? What happens then? Will he sort out a backup plan?

no, he's not going away, will just be working late.
I can get DS to nursery tomorrow, so should be ok.
I've just got head cold, fever and one almighty headache.. nothing life threatening!

What colditz said

he has just asked me to sort him a taxi from the airport.
I think he was actually going to ask me to pick him up, and then thought better of it

he can sort his own taxi
what an arse

i i magine there will be black cabs at the airport or he can ring a local firm.

I think yabu. He has been working away - surely not his fault and then had a weekend away.

Why is he being an arse? Can't see that a couple of hours make much difference? It's unfortunate that you're feeling I'll this week, but assume the weekend was booked before you and your ds were ill.

Hope you feel better soon.

he booked these flights knowing that he wouldn't have seen DS last weekend or the weekend before and he rarely gets home during the week before 7 or 8pm so doesn't see him then.
he could have just booked an earlier flight.
yes it's unfortunate I am ill and DS has been ill, he couldn't help that, and that probably means I feel more hard done by. But I feel like i have been on my own for the last 3 weeks

no ,the work trips aren't his fault.
But knowing you wouldn't see your family for 3 weekends wouldn't you book an earlier flight so you would get to see them? They didn't even have anything planned for today. It was just a big night out last night, so he had a lie in and been wandering around waiting to go to the airport.

domefavour - be careful. Don't make too many life changing decisions when you are sick & angry. Try really hard to calm down before he gets home. Tell him you feel like shit, are fed up of being home alone and would appreciate him coming home at a decent hour a few nights this week.

Wait until you are feeling better before deciding how bad things really are - I would guess that lone parenting is no barrel of laughs either - which is what you will end up doing if this is the end of the road for your marriage :(

Maybe you both need to talk about things (when you feel a bit better), work out what needs changing and how you can both change it - let him know just how close you are to throwing in the towel.

its just a European flight, there were 5 other BA flights today

i'm not gonna kick him out right now don't worry! I am actually very reasonable and calm and flexible, he gets a away with a lot and I do a lot for him, getting him organised etc, mainly because he is so horribly busy. But I'm just so sick of it.

He has had a major hr issue to sort, and that's out of the way now. And the business trips always mean more work, and he doesn't have any more planned now. He has said he will be home earlier this week, but something always comes up. And it's always just "one more obstacle and we will be ok" kinda thing. I told him last night that I was very lonely and he was very sorry. But he is out providing for us. He is going to look for another job, but seems to think that moving to middle east or Australia will solve everything. I have just been offered a job here and really looking foward to it. Also I'm really not sure that our marriage is in a strong enough place to warrant moving abroad with even less support