Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not go and collect my dh?

50 replies

ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 22/10/2010 23:12

My dh is over at his mate's house for a cards game.

I'm meant to be picking him up as he's had a couple of drinks.

But when I called him just now, a woman who I know has a huge crush on him (sits with her hand on his thigh in my own house!!!) calls out 'if she comes i'll have to get off his lap'.

Now I'm of the attitude I really can't be bothered to go and get you, make your own way home with her if you want, I'm going to stay on MN and then go to bed!

OP posts:
Katey1010 · 22/10/2010 23:13

What does he do when she does this kind of thing?

taintedpaint · 22/10/2010 23:14

She sounds just wonderful. I would probably do the same as you tbh.

Why do you let her in your house if she treats you with such little respect?

Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 22/10/2010 23:15

Nothing - neither encourages nor dissuades her.

When I say something later he'll either say he didn't notice, or she's only being friendly.

On the phone I said with comments like that your on your own, and he said what comments. Now if I can hear them down the phone he can hear them at his end.

OP posts:
escorchio · 22/10/2010 23:15

She said it, not your DH. Tell him he needs to show you how much he discourages her in the future though, or it is curtains.

Why do women think that sort of behaviour is OK?

Katey1010 · 22/10/2010 23:17

Oh, the fake innocence act... She sounds like a right strumpet but he needs to respect your feelings more. YANBU.

izzywizzywoowooo · 22/10/2010 23:17

Wow she sounds lovely...Hate women like this, anything to grab a bit of attention?

I would pick your DH up but tell him next time to say...

Get the fuck off me! Lol Smile

IsItNapTimeYet · 22/10/2010 23:17

She sounds delightful.

I'd go over and get him.

Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 22/10/2010 23:18

TBH she's not been in our house for over a year, due to this.

Rightly or wrongly - I don't think I can make my dh choose his friends although I do get cross he is oblivious or chooses to ignore, so I send her over to her house, on the rare occassions, he needs to, i.e. her child's birthday, or easter gifts.

OP posts:
2rebecca · 22/10/2010 23:18

She may have been joking. I'd collect him and make it clear to him(not tonight, when he's sober) that flirting with her isn't on.
I wouldn't invite a woman who did that to my house if I was unhappy with it, and would tell her to keep her hands to herself if she started that sort of thing in my presence.

Playing cards with a mate is a different thing to an evening with a woman who fancies him sitting on his lap.

Don't have a drunken on his behalf)row tonight about it though.

RoobyMurray · 22/10/2010 23:19

nah. fuck him.

Why can't he walk/get a cab?

Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 22/10/2010 23:21

RoobyMurray you have so got my attitude to it!

Yeah either of those options fine Grin

OP posts:
GeorgetteHeyer · 22/10/2010 23:26

I'd go get him, and when everyone has said goodbye and stuff, I'd lean over to her and say very quietly, so only she can hear (undrer the pretext of saying goodbye)

'You claim you might have sat on his lap, but he's in our bed tonight. And every night.'

Accompany with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

And then run.

and tell him in the morning he is not to flirt with her.

ChaoticAngel · 22/10/2010 23:27

Tell him to walk.

verytellytubby · 22/10/2010 23:29

I'm contrary. I'd pick him up just to ruin his fun.

Mumcentreplus · 22/10/2010 23:32

Ahh..you promised and plus he might fall into a bush or end up taking a short-cut through a wood Hmm Grin..

SheWillBeLoved · 22/10/2010 23:33

Go for him, rush in and without noticing her, say "Oh god I'm so sorry, got here as soon as I could! Are your legs okay?! How heavy was she?!"

She won't sit on his knee again in a hurry Grin

But being mature reasonable, leave it util tomorrow, and tell him to stop being such a clueless git. Although I don't believe that any man is that naive.

IsItNapTimeYet · 22/10/2010 23:35

shewillbeloved Grin

RoobyMurray · 22/10/2010 23:58

no. no way would i leave my lovely warm house for a drunkard that can get home by other means.

He is responsible for himself. OP is not his mum.

Hedgeblunder · 23/10/2010 00:03

Haha yep - 'god you poor thing you must have had a terrible dead leg with that lump sat on you!'

but tbh it sound like she knows the deal and was trying to wind you up on purpose.

I had this problem a while back and told dp I wouldn't associate with him as long as he associated with women like that.

CakeCuresAll · 23/10/2010 00:32

Waltz in and thank her for keeping your spot warm and make some comment about how if she enjoyed just getting the lap she'd absolutely love what your going to get when you get him home......

if he acts embarrassed / confused, explain to him that if he can't make the boundaries clear you'll have to keep marking your territory with big displays like this until she gets the message....

Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 23/10/2010 07:20

He walked home, and sulked all night on the sofa.

So not only did I not leave the house I also got the bed to myself double result!

OP posts:
notremotelyintofootie · 23/10/2010 07:25

why on earth did he sulk? some men really are twats arent they??

Mind you, i admit i love having the bed to myself on such occasions too! And they think its punishment??? Grin

saffy85 · 23/10/2010 07:26

Brilliant! Grin Although I like Shewillbeloved's idea best!

This woman sounds desperate and pathetic but your DH should be making the boundaries clear. Serves him bloody right he had to walk home!

Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 23/10/2010 07:30

I predict that this sulk will last for approximately 48 hours. And the good thing is it means I can do whatever I want all weekend. I've found sulking is the least ineffective thing to get a reaction from me as I can just so easily ignore it.

Punishment??? Pleasure all the way Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
ohdeargreeneyedmonster · 23/10/2010 07:32

And if you saw the woman, you'd know that Shewillbeloved's comment is spot on, and so appropriate. Esp compared to the weight of my dh!!!

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread