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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be furious by the school's attitude to this

101 replies

wotnochocs · 22/10/2010 09:15

DS school have booked a trip during school day which is going to cost £21 per child.
It is not a trip he even particularly wants to go on, and I certainly don't want to pay for.I have explained to the school that DH is self employed and we are feeling the pinch.The teacher yesterday called out the names ofthe children who haven't paid yet and said if they didn't bring the money in tomorrow they would all be in detention.
I rang the school to complain about this and the HofD defended the teachers actions (!)and said that he would speak to the bursar to see if the school would contribute a third of the cost.I pointed out the fact that legally it was a voluntary contribution not a debt and I want my legal rights respected.i would make a small contribution and didn't expect the school to chase me or DS anymore.he was very put out and hung up.I was completely controlled and polite but firm in my position.
Feel very shakey and upset.Surely that is why the govt made such a law to protect people like us from this kind of crap

OP posts:
sapphireblwhooooo · 22/10/2010 09:18

YANBU. If they continue to demand money I would just tell them that you don't want DS to go on the trip and that provision will have to be made for him to stay in school......I'm sure that would cause them more grief than you not making your voluntary contribution!

cory · 22/10/2010 09:19

Yes indeed. If you are unable to pay for the trip, they should either find the money or make other arrangements for your son during the day. Mine haven't always been able to go on all school trips, but the school has always found them something nice to do in another class and never ever made them feel uncomfortable about it. Detention for not making a voluntary contribution is absolutely not on.

pozzled · 22/10/2010 09:22

YANBU. Legally they can not demand the money, it is indeed voluntary. They can try to encourage it, but should not be punishing those who don't (or can't) contribute.

The only thing that schools can really do is to call off the trip if they don't get sufficient 'volunatry' contributions.

Alternatively, I think they need your permission for DS to attend, if it is something he isn't really interested in could you say that you don't give him permission to attend and therefore won't be paying? (Only problem with this is the risk of isolating him from all his peers that are going).

Marlinspike · 22/10/2010 09:23

You are absolutely right - if the trip is during the school day the school have a statutory obligation to educate your child on that day - they can ask for voluntary contributions, or they should make alternative arrangements in school for those pupils not participating.

If you get no joy with the HoD I would write to the HT and copy your letter to the chair of gvnrs. You should also ask to see their charging policy - they should have one!

Good luck!

DinahRod · 22/10/2010 09:23

Had ds reurned the reply slip saying he wasn't going?

ForMashGetSmash · 22/10/2010 09:24

YANBU....that teacher is a fool for reading the names out like that! Reminds me of the 70s when kids on free dinners had to sit and be served seperately!

Stick to your guns....phone back later and ask what's being done about it. OR....send in a small contribution tomorrow...deliver it personally to the head or his teacher....with a note inside the envelope stating that this is your voluntary contribution and your son will be attending the trip....as per your legal rights.

pozzled · 22/10/2010 09:24

Cory- did you know that legally the school are not allowed to exclude your children just because they didn't pay? I'm pretty sure they should still attend unless you refuse permission.

(At least this is what our school does and I always understood it as the legal position, not just school policy).

MassiveKnob · 22/10/2010 09:25

bloody cheek, saying a detention if you do not pay. How dare they.

Stick to your guns, in fact, I think you do not have to send your child at all, if he didn't want to go, especially if they are expecting you to pay for it.

Jux · 22/10/2010 09:27

DD is about to go on a trip, not quite as expensive as yours. We had a letter home which said very firmly that if every child did not pay then they would not be able to go at all. I thought Hmm about it, as though we could give them the 'voluntary' Grin contribution I know there are lots of people who would really find it hard if not impossible to do so. If I could have afforded to give them more to help pay for another place I would have, but I could only just scrape up dd's.

I think it's outrageous that you've been put in this position.

YANBU at all.

mazzystartled · 22/10/2010 09:29

twenty one quid!
where were they going?
it's a lot of money
the assumption that everyone can afford that is dreadful.

teacher bang out of order
write to the head

littleducks · 22/10/2010 09:33

I think that if the child hasnt returned the permission slip (either giving or refusing permission) then a punishment is fair. But they can not be punished for not paying.

becaroo · 22/10/2010 09:39

This is outrageous!

Phone the LA and complain. Do it now.

Am genuinely aghast at this. Your poor ds!

thx1138 · 22/10/2010 09:41

I think the teacher in question here is a tit. Threatening detention is appalling. I wonder if there is a school trip at all? Maybe the teacher needs the cash and is planning to do a bunk?

I am sure this is not the case but one of my teachers actually did this. She was coordinating a skiing trip and additional requests for payments kept coming home - the lift passes cost more than originally thought, the girls can go on a midnight, torchlit skiing trip with food and drink provided for an additional 100.00. Eventually parents started asking questions and the police were called in. It was very sad - she was an excellent teacher but desperate apparently.

spikeycow · 22/10/2010 09:52
Shock
TheLadyEvilStar · 22/10/2010 09:53

The poster who said they cannot exclude a child is correct. It is a voluntary contribution and even if a child doesn't pay they are still entitled to attend the visit.

ballstoit · 22/10/2010 09:54

Hmm.

1.The teacher read out the names of the children who hadnt paid. To the whole class. And threatened detention if they didnt pay? How old is DS? If he's not old enough to work part time then I'm not sure how they expect him to pay for his own trip. So otherwise, they should have taken it up with you. Except that...

  1. Schools can only ask for a voluntary contribution. Regardless of your income. Regardless of the school's budget. The contribution is voluntary. If it is not paid the school has 2 options a)cancel the trip b)fund the trip for those who havent contributed.They shouldnt exclude your DS from the trip if he hasnt paid.

3.The Head of Year put the phone down on you when you were having an adult conversation? Really? I would be taking this to the Head and Governors. They could probably do with sorting their policy out on this anyway, with the way the economy is going.

I have to say that the benefit of sending my DC to a 'poor' school, with lots of children from poor families, is that I dont get this hassle. Trips have only ever been to free museums or money from the Christmas fair etc has funded some of more expensive trips.

GypsyMoth · 22/10/2010 09:59

anyone know where we stand with children left behind from residentials??

had a letter to say those left behind will help less able kids in the classes in yr 5....ds is yr8....for a whole week!! no actual work

he's behind,he has a iep,he should be set some work.....and be TAUGHT in my opinion

alicatte · 22/10/2010 10:00

Pozzled,Lady Evil Star and ballstoit are right about the legal position. There should be no question about your child being excluded. You are speaking to the wrong people in the school. Go straight to the school office - explain the position. There are always contingency funds. If you don't want to send your child say so. If you do you MUST send in the slip, or they can't take him (There doesn't need to be any money with it). You could come to an arrangement to pay over time - if you wanted to do that. It is up to you.

didgeridoo · 22/10/2010 10:12

Shock Speak to the Head immediately & take it to the Governors if that doesn't get you anywhere. If that doesn't work go the Local Education Authority. Don't be fobbed off - this is appalling!

wotnochocs · 22/10/2010 10:15

Ds is 15, the school ban them from having part-time jobs during term time anyway.The trip is actually only for a morning to listen to GCSE poets read their poems

they have also recently launched a world challenge trip to take place in Summer 2112 which will cost £4,000 per child.I think in these difficult times it is wrong and divisive to do things like this.

OP posts:
TiggyD · 22/10/2010 10:32

Sounds like a dreadful trip anyway.

didgeridoo · 22/10/2010 10:34

Is this a state or private school, wot? I can't believe a state school would expect parents to be able to put their hands on this kind of money! And how can they "ban them from having part-time jobs during term time?"

wotnochocs · 22/10/2010 10:37

Yes it's a state school

OP posts:
Onetoomanycornettos · 22/10/2010 10:38

I also wondered if this is a state school? Mine have been in three different ones, and in every case, it's been worded the same way: we are asking for a voluntary contribution, but if there isn't enough, then the trip is cancelled. No singling out, no names, no detention. The trip always goes ahead as they budget for a few who can't pay and use other funds.

Outrageous. And I'm usually one of the ones who doesn't see the point in needlessly complaining to the school about every little thing. I would complain over that though!

HauntingTheTardis · 22/10/2010 10:42

Threatening children with detention is a form of blackmail, in my book. Attempting to obtain money with menaces. I would be confronting the HT with this fact.