not believing this about preschoolers being unable to chew

[SolidButShamblingUndeadBrass]

Has anyone else heard something to the effect that due to evil chavvy parents who are Selfish and Don't Care, lots of reception-age children can't chew food properly as they have been fed so much slop their jaws haven't developed?
It just sounds implausible to me. I thought the oiks fed their DC Greggs products from 6 weeks old anyway and you need your bloody teeth to get through a steak bake...

Yes I have tried drinking from one and was bemused by how difficult it was. I tpook the filter thing out in the end.

Then I bought some Tommee Tippee ones.

I have come across a few preschoolers who can't/won't chew.

In many cases I think it's partly because the parent didn't give them proper solid food - they confused gagging with choking and at the first sign of a gag or retch they took the solid food away and went back to purees or equivalent.

Quavers and Wotsits aren't solid as they melt in the mouth. Most cereals aren't solid as they turn to mush. Children really need to be given a variety of foods of different textures and the sad fact is that many parents don't eat a good variety of proper food themselves, so are unlikely to feed it to their children.

You're quite right there Sidge, they aren't really solid are they? Nothing like a raw carrot for example.

My parents were weird like that with all their grandchildren, confusing gagging and even normal chewing with choking. Happy to give the DGC whole grapes (in the supermarket ) though.

Ds was weaned at 17 weeks on purees, had non spill avent cups and is now perfectly able to chew and just won't shut up. I don't think no spill cups or purees at an early stage are the problem. It's people not moving on from purees etc and not talking to their DCs.

There's a difference between speech problems and language problems though. Speech is to do with making the sounds with your mouth and that's what food/drink problems may cause. Language problems are more about lack of talking, not using sentences etc. This is the more likely outcome of a home where parents don't talk. My motormouth DD doesn't have any problem with the latter!

Thegraveyardshoshe - you're absolutely right - its not a class issue, An aquaintance of mine (very affluent) has a 2 year old who only drinks formula and eats pureed food. She is very cross that the GP refused to prescribe the special high calorie liquid food stuff (no idea what it is myself) because her DD didn;t actually have a medical problem.. Apparently HV is now involved trying to get the child onto at least puree with texture.

Lots of DS's toddler peers use Anyway Up cups and they all speak heaps and leaps and bounds in comparison to DS (sigh). I really do not want to abandon AnyWay Up cups at this point, would be a major stress.

AreYouAFreudOfTheDark, what exactly is your DC speech delay like? Is it fronting her sounds or what?

I think a lot of parents are scared of introducing lumps (all classes) so I can see how it starts.

Maybe if we lived in a more supportive (village) society where people actually 'see' other kids being raised, not this competitive parenting or feeling like your being judged on EVERYTHING then there wouldn't be as many cases. We raise kids behind closed door really.

As far as I can make out it's a problem with particular sounds - g and c are the most noticeable (cat is dat, dog is dod) but generally people can't understand what she's saying. I hate that some people assume she's thick :(

Basically I just feel I messed up everything about feeding DD - first I couldn't bf properly, she only fed using shields, then I was so obsessed about getting her off the evil bottle that I forced her onto a cup before she was ready. Also got rid of the dummy by 6m but she then started sucking her fingers and still does it.

"This is the more likely outcome of a home where parents don't talk. My motormouth DD doesn't have any problem with the latter!"

Areyouafreudofthedark, language problems are not necessarily due to a household where the parents don't speak.

My DD is being referred for speech therapy (2.7) and we talk to her all the time. Read to her constantly, engage in conversation and describe everything we are doing but she cant link her words together and only has about 15-20 words that she can actually say.

We weaned onto purees at 17 weeks and she used the free flow tommee tippee cup. She was eating lumps by 5 or 6 months and drinking from a nuby cup with a straw. Then was eating the exact same as us, 3 meals a day, cut up into pieces and feeding herself with a fork by a year. She eats anything and everything but still has speech problems.

Coconuts - I know that not all language problems (or indeed speech problems) are caused by parenting. What I meant was that specifically in homes where the child isn't talked to, language trouble is a more likely outcome than speech sound trouble (IMO)

Hope your DD gets the help she needs :)

I couldn't imagine never speaking to my DD. It's such a shame that this happens in households accross the country, even the world. And i also couldn't imagine how much worse DD's speech would be if she wasn't spoken to.

Hopefully the SALT will pin point the problem. How old is your DD? Is she receiving SALT?

Nothing wrong with a steak bake.

Areyouafreudofthedark "Basically I just feel I messed up everything about feeding DD - first I couldn't bf properly...".

Surely it is more likely that there was something about your DD which meant that she couldn't bf properly, and everything afterwards has been harder too - maybe something as simple as a bubble palate.

You were just doing your best, you did not mess up.

The trouble with parenting, is that all kinds of bad things are correlated with one another, for lots of different reasons. Lazy HCPs jump to blaming the parents - they are only right some of the time.

How old is your DD, Freudofthedark? I reckon that the problems you mention would still be in the normal range for a 3yo, for instance. DS3 is nearly 3yo and still missing loads of fundamental sounds, C and G included. I will probably have to push hard to get him SALT, too.

Near as I can tell, I raise DC about the same as most parents in terms of what I do that supports or hinders their speech development. While other kids talk up a storm, 2 of mine struggle to put any words together or say them clearly. There's something genetic or structural going on with DC, it's the only explanation that makes sense.

My DD is 3.4. So it's not completely out of the normal range but it makes me sad to hear her in comparison to her peers, especially as in terms of vocabulary, grammar etc she's actually quite advanced IMHO - but other adults keep giving her this face

Thank goodness it hasn't held her back yet though, she's very popular.

Just one of those things that reminds us we can't do everything right!

I know what you mean, when DS2 was nearly 5yo I had one of his classmates around here to play; the other boy (exact same age as DS, and has quite a reputation for naughty behaviour, so not especially "mature"!) he could speak crystal clear such a contrast from DS. I felt rather :( about it.

it is saddening to watch our DCs struggle with things.

Everyone says "oh you shouldn't compare, no two children are the same" but it's hard to sit and watch them with other children the same age and those children are speaking in fluent, confident sentences.

My DD finds it hard to integrate and I need to build her confidence but I can't (don't know how) as she can't speak to other children.

Maybe I worry too much.