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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be a bit pissed of that dhs playing with dd ended with her going to a and e last night?

36 replies

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 10:25

ok i am probably am a bit

dh was playing with dd just before bed, they were running about in the house, he was getting her to chase him.

she fell and hit her head, we don't really know what on as dh didnt see her fall as dd was behind him.
it might have been the worktop ot the side of the kitchen units
any way

big cut on the head, blood everywhere trip to a and e
they used 3 steri strips to close it

tbh i felt a bit pissed of with dh.
i kept a lid on it and didn't have a go at him though as it wouldnt help dd.

aibu to be a bit pissed off

and

aibu to ban running about in the kitchen?
as last time when dh was playing trapping her in his legs then letting go.
she somehow fell on the floor and cut her chin open.

OP posts:

lal123 · 15/10/2010 10:27

yabu - it was an accident

SpecterBooAlot · 15/10/2010 10:28

No one should run in a kitchen, its dangerous.

And I don't think you're BU - your DH sounds rather careless and thoughtless, tbh.

SolidButShamblingUndeadBrass · 15/10/2010 10:28

YABU to be pissed off with him as it was an accident and could just as easily have happened if your DD was playing chase with other DC.
However, it might be an idea to institute a new house rule of no running in the kitchen.

JinnyS · 15/10/2010 10:29

YABU. Playing is great and accidents happen

nickytwotimes · 15/10/2010 10:29

I understand, but it was an accident, yes.

Bet dh feels terrible!

Poor dd. And you.

cat64 · 15/10/2010 10:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

LionOnTheFloorInAPoolOfBlood · 15/10/2010 10:30

I'd be a bit annoyed about the running about games just before bed TBH. The last thing they need is a bit of winding up before trying to sleep. You could try suggesting to DH that he sticks to calming down games - reading, board games, puzzles, drawing etc.

Think you'll have to chalk the accident up to experience - they do happen when running around is involved, not really DHs fault as such unless he directly caused it.

3ismylot · 15/10/2010 10:30

YABU it was purely an unfortunate accident

Im sure your DH would never of wanted her to fall over and hurt herself and it was lovely that he was actually being a hands on dad and spending time with her.

How would you feel if she had had the accident when you were playing with her and your DH blamed you for it?

curlymama · 15/10/2010 10:36

I'm with Lion, it's the running around before bed that would get me.

But it was an accident, I'm sure your DH feels awful, and has probably realised his mistke. You being all 'I told you so!' won't help the situation, even if saying it will make you feel better!

At least if he does it again, you can use this as a reminder to stop him.

Original poster

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 10:38

i'm glad i didn't let him see i was pissed off and didn't have a go at him or anything.

i do agree that having a loving father that plays with you outweighs the occassional bump/accident.
he was playing with her with her sylvanians prior to the chase game, which was quite sweet they were giving them a bath etc.

perhaps a ban from playing inthe kitchen would be best as theres plenty of space in the living room to run.
we have hard wooden floors which don't help.
i think thats why she cut her chin open the other time as she fell onto a hard wooden floor

OP posts:

giraffesCantDookForApples · 15/10/2010 10:41

I was playing sleepig bunnies with 2 children I nannied for in their bedroom before bathtime - youngest fell and had huge lump on head from wardrobe. Its a massive room, he was just too excited.

These things happen and will happen. Hope she feels better soon. (choc helps )

Plumm · 15/10/2010 10:43

YABU, it was an accident. I would, however, ban running in the kitchen as there is potential for accidents.

Original poster

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 10:44

he did say how fate is a funny thing, as we were just about to play elefun.
[after we have had tea and tidyed, we try and do/play something with dd, give her some quality attention]
and last night we were going to play elefun.

but dd said she'd rather play with her sylvanians.

anyway dh said after she'd gone to bed if only we'd played elefun this wouldn't have happened.

OP posts:

harassedinherpants · 15/10/2010 10:46

I think YAB a little U, but can see your point! I don't like running or messing about in the kitchen though, the floors can be very slippery (we have wooden floors too).

My dh let our then 4mth old dd fall off the sofa onto the floor when Man U scored..... She got a nasty bang on the head, and I was in tears, NHS Direct were fab, but then she fell asleep and wouldn't wake up. Ambulance came and she instantly woke for them!!! Dh still feels guilty about that one lol, but now I can look back and not want to murder him .

jalopy · 15/10/2010 10:48

Agree. It was an accident.

I would be pissed off with his choice of 'high activity, adrenaline inducing, full on excitement' type of activity before bedtime.

Is he mad?

DanceOnTheDarkSide · 15/10/2010 10:48

There is a reason we have no running in the house at all !

Deliaskis · 15/10/2010 10:49

It was an accident, YABU IMHO.

Original poster

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 10:52

i don't mind the hyper time before bed as after dds had a good playtime with us,
we often have a bit of a disco,which does seem the oppasite of what most people we know do.
we then get her dressed for bed and read her her story.

so she still gets the change to wind down before bed
goes to bed fine.

OP posts:

Original poster

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 10:53

chance

OP posts:

FindingMyMojo · 15/10/2010 10:54

It was an accident. I think men tend to play rougher with kids than women - and most of the time this is a good thing. Running in the house isn't great though so I'd be annoyed he was encouraging that. As for before bedtime, I hope (on a normal non A&E night) he'd be responsible for settling her down to sleep after all the rukus.

MaMoTTaT · 15/10/2010 10:58

agree YABU - my children are like yours carrie they can be haring around the house literally minutes before going to bed and still go to bed fine. Not all children need a long wind down time.

Accident was unfortunate, could quite literally have happened anywhere - even outside (for the person that says no running in the house at all). On holiday I saw a girl (about 11-12yrs old?) smack her cheek/eye really REALLY hard on a piece of play equipment as she wasn't really looking where she was running and had veered off towards it. Thankfully after a LOT of tears she was fine.

But indoors/outdoors children will run into things/bang their head/arm/leg/insert any other body part on them.

Gorionine · 15/10/2010 10:58

"your DH sounds rather careless and thoughtless, tbh."

How can you get to that conclusion from OP? He was playing with his little girl, she fell and got hurt it was an accident.

hmc · 15/10/2010 11:00

YABU - could have hurt herself playing a similar game in the garden

Original poster

carriedababi · 15/10/2010 11:00

the other time she got injured was when dhs reactions wasn't quick enough.

at a park she came down the slide the went to go running round to go up again, but went the wrong side[it was a swing slide set] and smash a foot right in her face she walked right in front of a swing.

she was only about 2, dh was standing at the bottom of the slide, but his reactions are so slow, by the time he realised she was going the swing way intead of the clear way he was too late to stop her.
i think he had his hands in his pockets .

but like the time when she went flying of the bottom of a large slide,and hit her head as she flew off the slide, and even though dh was standing at the bottom, was too slow to react [hands in his pocket again]

i do wonder if he senses danger really, as if i had been at the bottom of the slide im pretty sure she wouldn't have walked in front of the swing as i would have pre anticated it, and directed her the clear way.

i don't know if he really see the danger sometimes.

OP posts:

MaMoTTaT · 15/10/2010 11:02

we've only had one significant "running around the house" injury in our house .....and that was exH smashing the kitchen light with his head as he jumped towards the stair gate keeping DS2 out of the kitchen during a game - 'twas DS2's birthday and it ended up with exH driving himself up to A&E to make sure had no shards of glass still stuckin his head

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