to not understand the idea of 'wanting your body back'?

[Serendippy]

I mean, I do understand the desire to reclaim your body (although after pregnancy mine wasn't worth reclaiming), but to not BF because of this? I saw the baby as taking up 9 months inside and then at least 6 months outside BF, not just the length of the pregnancy. Didn't actually work out like that but still.

Would anyone get pregnant thinking 'I want my body back after 7 months so will demand a premature delivery by CS'? Or what if the baby is overdue?

I am totally baffled at this reasoning. Why is having a baby thought of as just the length of the pregnancy?

Speaks a mother who was overweight, bleeding and exhausted after birth for many weeks and therefore whose body belonged to anyone who would take it, namely DD.

But the whole premise of this thread is that we own our bodies. It's a very Cartesian, dualist, Western view. Are our bodies separate from our souls? Are our bodies separate from those of our partners? Or are we all to an extent owned by the State which provides our midwifery/medical care during pregnancy, the men and/or women who make love to and/or abuse our sexuality, our children who will always be a bit of us?

To me, the whole concept of 'getting my body back' makes no sense because, whether or not I am pregnant with or BF my DC, we're still a part of one another...

Actually instead of getting my body back could I please have Charlize Theron's?

I sometimes want people to stop touching me, it is directly related to BFing because I had the same thing when I was BFing DS1. They are just on me so much that I sometimes just want to have a bit of personal space.

It isn't a very strong feeling but it is there nonetheless.

I hated that feeling that my body was public property when pregnant, people touching my tummy etc. Yuk, leave me alone! (Except you, DH, you can do it)

I can relate to that Morloth, DS used to have a habit of stroking my face which sounds nice, but just got bloody irritating after a while. Some days I just feel a bit 'touched out'

Everyone's different. Breastfeeding sorta annoyed me at times. The tie. It's how I felt and I don't know why it bothers you.

I wanted to wear an underwired bra. I wanted SUPPORT. I suppose it was wanting my body back. It was wanting my body, or at least my breasts, to be under my control I suppose. So I could be comfortable. I wanted to be comfortable.

I breastfed for 18 months, and for the last 6 months of that really felt like I wanted my body back. Can't blame those who give up earler, either. I would have, if I had figured out how to do it.

I wanted my body back, but not in a clothes/figure kind of way. I had just had enough of being taken over by baby/hormones/leaky bits/sore bits for such a long time. I had a bad pg and a bad labour and quite a painful experience BF. Added to which I felt mentally taken over by the whole baby experience, especially in the first few months, because it was so all-encompassing and overwhelming.

As much as I love my LO and loved being pg (despite the not so nice bits) I was still glad to feel like "me" again, just as I was before, without the piles/heartburn/inability to bend or stretch/SPD/cracked nipples/ etc etc etc. It just got too much and I didn't feel I could move on as a mother unless I began to feel like me again, physically, which was closely linked to moving on and developing mentally.

It was a factor for me in giving up bfing. Not the only one, but I had got to a point where I didn't want DD pulling at my top, I wanted to choose clothes without worrying about how easy access they were, I didn't want to be available all the time. I did feed for about a year, but I couldn't have carried on indefinitely. Hard to explain but I guess it is about boundaries- anything under my clothes is private and as DD developed into a toddler rather than a baby it seemed natural to me to go back to privacy in that way.

That said, I do still take baths with her but that feels different because it's under my control.

I like this thread.

As others have said, for most women the phrase "getting your body back" doesn't refer to the shape of it.

I b/f for 14 months and stopping felt great! Continuing to b/f had made my lingering spd linger more and once I'd stopped I could take whatever medication I needed, have a drink when I wanted and not have sore boobs if ds decided to have a milk free day.

Just realised I have been pg and/or bf for over 4 years now! Am definitely starting to get that "want my body back" feeling, a bit. But don't want to wean either.

Shriiiieeeek, good on you! Can imagine the desire to have your body back is very, very strong now! I think how much you want your body back and how soon seems to depend on the type of pregnancy, labour or feeding experience. I didn't get 'wanting it back' straight after pregnancy and this being a reason for not starting BF as I had an easy pregnancy, but I can totally imagine that if I had been feeding/pregnant for years I would be desperate to have some control over my boobs again!

After reading comments I feel like I understand why some women need to feel in control again! Thanks again for your replies