to think people are jolly unreasonable about ff/bf?

[Hullygully]

1. I don't care what anyone feeds their babies: sardines, coca cola, bm, fm (although it is a bit sad for the babies if it's sardines).

1. Breast milk is best. If nothing else it has long chain fatty acids that cannot be replicated in formula.

1. Some people can't bf so fine, use formula.

I can't see what else there is to discuss.

Sorry Hully, got distracted by Chilean miners, because I didn't want to.

WHen I gave birth back before dinosaurs roamed the earth, and in fact I didn't give birth, I was sliced open, the woman in the bed opposite me watched me bf and told me, perfectly pleasantly, that she thought "ugh" and was "saving her breasts for her husband."

Thank you, Wiggles.

I am actually not desperately bothered if someone has chosen to ff from the off. I could get into an academic discussion about why and whether it might in some cases be as a result of the ff predominance in our culture. But such a discussion is entirely academic and I'm a pragmatist. I am bothered about lack of support, incompetent hcps and the distress caused by the pro bf message not being backed up in any positive manner.

Parenting is a horses for courses affair. I have my choices which work for me. I'm not a better parent and do get hassle in rl for bf and co-sleeping. But, whatever. I am so over the mn bf/ff bunfights.

I do agree, but having been both a formula feeder and a breast feeder I can see why people get so defensive on both sides.

DD1 formula fed: 'ah, you stopped BF, that's such a shame, why didn't you try a bit longer,don't you want what's best for your baby, no there's no such thing as low supply, your latch was wrong, you did it wrong, you're such a bad mother'

DD2 exclusively breast fed: 'ooh, she's a bit small, maybe you don't have enough milk, why don't you top her up, it never did mine any harm, look my baby's sleeping through the night nernernernerner, you're such a bad mother'

And we wonder why people have issues?!

Yes, I can see that what I failed to take into account is that some people take notice of what other peole think.

Another "chooser" here. (Actually I mixed bf and ff for 8 weeks, then chose to ff exclusively.)A variety of reasons but mainly around wanting DH to be able to do a proper 50% from the start, to be able to share sleep and feeds, and to have the flexibility of ff when I wanted to. Was best decision I ever made and would do exact same thing with next baby. Honestly think I would have developed PND if I'd breastfed exclusively. (Though I do have some 'history' so I'm not just being pessimistic here!)

Agree with OP anyway - people are too obsessed with it - though more on the internet than in real life.

Oh I don't know, Riven, I ask all my dc's friends whether or not they supped at the breast.

Thank you Shiney.

It's interesting, the difference between the abstract and the personal. People have strongly held general opinions, breast is best/tits are for husbands etc etc, yet when you know people as individuals, you know that there are as many complicated/simple reasons and choices as there are individuals.

ah Hully you are so right BUT you said "Breastmilk is best" so it's probably going to kick off regardless, because sadly to so many people that is an inflammatory comment designed to make many women feel shit about themselves, dontchaknow?

PutTheKettleOn

Are we the same person and I've not noticed? Oh, thankgoodness for that, I ff DS1 and bf DD.
Other than that I think I had the same experience.

I like the fact I ff one and bf the other as I can have some fantastic arguments with myself.

...did I mention I weaned one at 4 mos and t'other at 6 mos? Just off to argue about it with myself...

When you say she was saving her breasts for her husband, do you mean like in a little box?

BUT you said "Breastmilk is best"

But it is. That is an unarguable FACT, that's why I don't understand what there is to argue about.

As Shiney and Wiggle pointed out, choice is a whole different banana.

Raised, I know, she was terribly sweet and young and it was her fourth child. He was very sweet too and they were very fond of each other. I just smiled and said "That's lovely."

17 yr old boys are the most fun..see them squirm with horror.

You have oversimplified number 3. The controversy stems from the fact that some people just choose not to breast feed because they don't want to even though they know its best for their baby - these people are in a totally different category to those who do their best to BF but have to give up because its not working. I have friends who know fine well that it would be much better for their baby to BF but won't because they just think its inconvenient or a bit gross. Personally I think they are mental!