Aibu thinking 1st time parents sent home too fast

[lilyliz]

young couple next door home from hosp seven hours after birth of their 1st DD.The two of them don't have parents or other rellies around and are totally at a loss what to do with this new being,would it not be better to keep mum in a few days to sort of show her the ropes.I know myself and others will help but there is maybe folk out there with no one.

In Israel they have a lovely thing called "Baby Hotels".

Basically its a floor of the hospital that has been converted into a hotel (in the style of a Travel Lodge rather than the Ritz!) where you can stay after you have been discharged. Its costs about the same as a night in a travelodge would.

My sister stayed there for about a week after giving birth to her twins. Her DH and DD1 were able to sleep in the room too and help was on-hand in "room-service" sort of style. The whole family was able to bond together and keep the outside world out.

Fantastic idea - good inbetween option between hospital and home.

Sullwah, we have that in Nottingham! It's very nice apparently I was at a different hospital for various reasons when I had DD, but quite a few ladies from my ante-natal group used it and thought it was brilliant.

One benefit of DD being born at 27 weeks - we were shown how to change/bath/feed her and we got 9 weeks unbroken sleep before she came home.

However she then made up for it by screaming solidly for HOURS at a time, developing reflux, waking every 45 minutes...

All the HV would say is 'Oh, but you're doing so well!'

I was discharged straight from the delivery room 8 hours after ds was born, I only got there 30 minutes before he was born (not by choice) so total time in hospital was 8 1/2 hours. I was totally clueless and in a lot of pain but felt under pressure to go home. At home we got 1 mw visit and 1 mca visit and then we were discharged, I didn't have a single check up despite asking several times and hardly being able to walk. I broke my stitches open when ds was 5 days old and they said I'd have to wait another 8 days to go to the clinic to see a mw so I pulled them out as they were so sharp and painful. At that clinic appointment the mw didn't check me or ds at all, she sat there with a student telling her how she wished all her patients were so easy! I'm so glad we had no problems with breastfeeding because the support was not there at all. The scary thing is ds is my first baby, I dread to think how little support there will be next time!

Just came home from hospital 2 days ago. I'm in Australia, and have health insurance which covers private room with a double bed, so my husband stayed with me. There was a TV and private bathroom, all meals delivered, my room cleaned. The nurses took DD during the night when she wouldn't settle. They showed me how to bath her, bf and were very helpful. I stayed for 4 days, which was my choice.

I wish more people could have this experience, as I also know how isolating and lonely it can be in hospital when I was there years ago for an operation.

I gave birth four months ago and the midwives/paediatrician told me it was standard practice to keep first-time mothers in for a minimum of three days. Maybe it varies depending on whereabouts you live? It was sooooo depressing to watch all these mums with three children swanning into the ward then waltzing out again a few hours later when all I wanted was to go home and they wouldn't let me

I was there for two weeks before I managed to con the midwives into thinking my son was eating loads so I could escape!
Hated every minute of being there so actually, OP, I think it depends on your circumstances as to how soon you should go home. I would have been much better off at home, with my DP, his mum, my mum and my sisters all around to help me, rather than stuck in hospital with already overstretched midwives who could barely spare five minutes. And who sneered at/looked down on me for not being able to BF, along with making me hide my bottles of formula as it happened to be national breastfeeding week ...

i thin the amount of support required and how it is given depends so much on how the birth went etc.. i NEEDED to get out of the hospital after my first and once we did we started to bond as we did it our own way. It reads "baby discharged at mothers insistance" on his discharge notes, fucking bitch midwife!

I think it might have been better to have her stay in a few hours.

I'm one of those all too common new mothers who had no experience with babies and no family around. I stayed in two days after an EMCS.
It was really nice knowing there was an experienced someone on the other end of a buzzer who could give me a hand while my head stopped spinning and I figured out which end of the baby was which

With DS (first) there was no way I would have been let out early due to big blood loss and transfusion later on etc. Although was only in for two nights after he was born, I had been in for 5 days before and was fed up of hospital!

With DD she was born at 1:30pm. I think I was offered the choice to go home that day but asked to stay in for a night. Was definitely right decision