'Ahhh, wouldn't you rather have a girl?'

[stillfrazzled]

Sorry, I know there have been a lot of gender threads this week.

Am 21 weeks pg with DS2 - scan confirmed gender last week and have been mentioning this to people at work etc if they ask how I'm doing.

On Friday, no less than THREE people asked if I wasn't disappointed and hadn't I wanted a girl.

I am a bit and that people are effectively inviting me to express disappointment about a real live (if unborn) baby.

So would IBU to say, politely: "Well, I've had two miscarriages since New Year's Day and this pregnancy looked like it wasn't viable for the first trimester. I'm too grateful for a baby to quibble about what's between its legs."

I don't want to be horrible, but I would quite like to make sure they think twice before asking such a daft question again.

[In the interests of total honesty, I have to admit that if I had been given a free choice, I would have liked one of each. But even so]

Next time someone says that to you just say, "Yeah I'm gutted it's not a girl actually, we don't want another boy so we've decided to put him on ebay as soon as he's born and start trying again for a daughter as soon as the stiches have healed. Unless you want him...?"

Why not just acknowledge the truth & say 'Yes it would have been lovely if it had been a girl, but really, we are just extremely happy to be happy having another baby'.

Why deny the fact that could you have chosen you'd have chosen a girl - it's not a crime & doesn't mean you don't love them just as much once they're here!