for resenting my DH for not wanting to make more money?

[Cloudysky]

Okay, deep breath, this is a bit of a heavy one for a first post but I'm pregnant (with second) and could use some sane, non-hormonal persepective on this.
My husband told me before we got married that he wasn't going to make lots of money because he's a painter and that's what he loves doing and he wasn't ever going to give it up. Fine - I was earning good money and so madly in love that I didn't think it mattered. With family money we (he, really) bought somewhere to live, me paying the mortgage. After we got married I had primal baby cravings, and even though he said he wasn't ready for a baby (I suspected he never would be) we tried - once - and I got pregnant. He freaked out and the next two/three years were basically fighting and fury towards one another; the good thing is we have a DD now who he worships. Now I'm pregnant again - mutual decision this time - and I'm anxious about the future. I'm earning less since DD part time, admittedly, but my income is less than it's ever been in my working life and my DH earns the same as me, working full time and then spending time after work and at the weekends in his studio. He's had about 10 years of further education - 2 BAs, an MA, other stuff - but when I suggest he finds a job that pays more so he can spend time in the studio but also spend time with his family, he flips out and says he doesn't have the skills to do anything else.
Anyway, even though we don't have a terrible life it is eating me up (we get quite a lot of working tax credits, although I would rather not be on them -- don't think it's particularly good for self respect). Am I being mad? Should I just be tougher about this?

nearlytoolate - 'and perhaps you've shielded him from this to some extent because of his ambivalence about your first pregnancy?': Nail. Head. And the rest of post too. Also in first stages of relationship I projected a lot of confidence that I didn't necessarily feel; was the caretaker, the competant one, the one who paid for stuff. Since DD he doesn't seem to be aware that there have to be shifts in domestic responsibility, but to be fair I haven't pressed it.

Yabu- you are the one working only part time. Go get a full time job yourself if you want more money coming in

violethill, if you know of anyone who'll take on someone full time who's 5 months pregnant please let me know.

Cloudy, I was really thinking about seeing if your current employer would let you go f/t - agree it's going to be difficult to get a new f/t job right now (and no ML benefits either potentially).

I do agree though that it sounds as though it's not his job that's the issue, it's all the spare time being spent at the studio. He should pull his weight more with helping at home and with the children; it's up to him whether he does that by changing jobs or by reducing studio time, but he can't just leave it all to you.

I don't see how suggesting the OP work full time really means the situation is any better - yes, you'll have a bit more money, but the issue is more about the lack of team work. If you worked full time you would probably have to keep juggling the house and kids anyway. He sounds incredibly self indulgent. I don't know how you make him value family life more. Can he somehow involve DD in the art, or is this a completely stupid suggestion?

Yup, exactly minipie and domesticgodess, it comes down to team work, but it's going to be hard getting the message through - he doesn't want to hear it - so I'm going to have to take a stand. Not looking forward to it or sure I have the strength! But still, some of the thoughtful comments on here have helped clarify my muddled thinking so thanks to those.