Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have stormed out of Netto in a huff because they wouldn't sell me wine

115 replies

LizzieMint73 · 20/09/2010 15:38

Ooh I am so cross. Today I made a special trip to Netto to buy Oyster Bay wine which is on special offer (is normally £9 but they are selling it at a fiver a bottle).

The checkout girl asked for ID on the instruction of the manager who was working on the next till. When I'd picked myself up off the floor (I'm 37 and probably older than both of them) I realised in horror, that no I could not prove my age. I had credit cards and a works ID with photo, but nothing with my date of birth on - they just repeated loads of nonsense parrot fashion over and over that if they let me buy the wine they would lose their jobs and get fined. Worse thing was that they probably accepted that I was over 18 but they would not allow me to buy the wine because I could not prove I was over 25. They would not accept my arguement that no law was being broken because they were happy I was legally able to buy alcohol.

At this point I just said that I didn't have time for this and stormed out leaving the wine and a few other bits on the belt.

I don't like carrying my driving licence because if my bag got nicked they would have my address and my house keys so would have to get the locks changed etc. Similiary, I dont want to have to carry my passport in case it gets lost/stolen.

I accept that I might look more like in my early 30s than late 30s but I think that is more due to many other people looking really old for their age, rather than me looking younger. There is no way that I look under 25 and I think it is a bit much that I have to prove my age. This is the second time this has happended recently and no, it is not a compliment, it is a bloody pain in the arse.

OP posts:
crazykat · 20/09/2010 17:59

My DH is forever getting asked for i.d. Before the smoking age was raised he tried to buy a packet of cigs and got asked for i.d. - he was 26 and you could see he had a tattoo on each of his arms. He had no i.d. so I had to go in and buy them for him. I was quite gutted I didn't get asked given that he's 8 years older than me.

I did get refused a 12 certificate DVD last year though - I was 21 and had DD (2) and newborn DS with me. They said I had to look 15.

salizchap · 20/09/2010 18:23

You have to be so careful these days if you work in a shop that sells alcohol. It's unreasonable to fire and fine a person £10000 who is probably earning the NMW! Therefore, expect the unreasonable backlash!

It does sound a bit OTT tho, especially about the 57 yo dad!!! PMSL

libelulle · 20/09/2010 18:46

I got ID'd in waitrose earlier this year when I was trying to buy an 80p bottle of cooking cider as part of an 80 quid weekly shop, heavily pregnant and with toddler in tow. (I'm 33 btw). Then when I got out the paper bit of my driving license but was struggling to locate the photocard in my wallet, she looked triumphant and said 'you don't have it, do you?' in a kind of 'aha I've caught you out' kind of way. I know that staff have to be careful re the legalities of underage alcohol buying, but more often I think it's a petty way of asserting power by officious jobsworths who know perfectly well that you are not underage.

I actually complained to customer services who agreed that she'd been out of order. I do always wonder, though - if they genuinely believe that you are under 18, they ought to then call the police when you try to pay by credit card for your shopping, as you must clearly be using someone else's card. But logic doesn't come into it.

So YANBU at all, while it's nice to look young for your age it's insulting and demeaning to be challenged like that.

sparkle12mar08 · 20/09/2010 20:07

I've said it before and I'll say it again now, it's ID cards by stealth. It makes me incoherent with rage when this happens, because it's utter and total bollocks. The civil liberties argument is huge, and nobody ever seems to really get it. Urgh I can't say any more or I'll get myself banned!

SquishedEgg · 20/09/2010 20:32

YANBU, it is really annoying, especially when the child on the other side of the counter doesn't look old enough to be selling alcohol to you ("No, I haven't got ID, Have you got your ID with you?")

"If you have to be 18 then a credit card should suffice as you can't have a credit card under 18."
Just a note. I have worked in financial services before. You have to 18 to open a credit card account and be the main cardholder, but there is no age limit for a second cardholder. You can have a card for your dog if you want one. So having a card with your name on is not proof of age.

frazzle26 · 20/09/2010 22:16

I was in Tesco's last year with my ex-bf. We had been walking around together and then he left to go to the car before I got to the checkout. When I went to pay they asked for my ID and "the ID of the man you were with!!". I then had to phone him from the checkout and when he said he didn't have any ID, they wouldn't serve me the wine!! We were both 26 at the time. Angry was NOT the word!!!

MammyT · 20/09/2010 22:25

I dream of this happening!!!!

You are being a bit ungrateful though - what I'd do for a complement like that! Grin

AvrilHeytch · 20/09/2010 22:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

junkcollector · 20/09/2010 22:37

I'd be happy if I looked that young. I have been asked twice for ID in my local supermarket but each time the cashier laughed as if it's the funniest joke they'd ever heard and said "only joking".

Enjoy it. You'll miss it when your body and face do finally go south.

gremlins · 20/09/2010 22:49

YABU - for looking under 25 when you're 37!

It is annoying at the time of the incident, but in a couple of days time you'll (hopefully) find it funny and rather complimentary!

EverythingInMiniature · 20/09/2010 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tokyonambu · 21/09/2010 00:00

The solution is that if you're asked for ID in an officious way, leave the shopping and walk out. They'll get the hint.

As someone points out, it was an ID Card By Stealth project by Labour, and now the ID Card is dead. And with several stakes through its evil heart, such as "no, you can't have your £35 back, we warned you" and "no, you can't continue using it as a travel document": they stopped short of tattooing "idiot" on the people who bought it and having their neighbours point and mock, but only just.

Hopefully, now there is no stealth project to encourage people to get ID Cards for the sake of a quiet life, the ludicrous excesses will stop. But petty jobsworths don't give up that easily, and the fact that this sort of crap has been imposed on shops is proof that local authority budgets haven't been cut enough yet.

thespindoctor · 21/09/2010 00:35

Ha ha tokyonambu, I like your humour

Chil1234 · 21/09/2010 07:14

The self-checkout assistants at my local Tesco leap forward with positively indecent haste to press the "customer clearly a doddery old coffin-dodger" button whenever I buy alcohol. For vanity reasons it would be lovely just once if they would pause.... and maybe weigh me up a little.

gorionine · 21/09/2010 07:23

I would say YANBU but

"Checkout staff have to be so careful these days. They can lose their job & be fined something staggering like £10,000. Not the company, not the shop, them."

After reading that I understand a bit better the "overzealousness" that is quite a bit of money!Shock

I need the name of the 70 yo lady's plastic surgeon though, blimey he must be good!Grin

tokyonambu · 21/09/2010 07:57

"They can lose their job & be fined something staggering like £10,000."

Except, back in the real world, there hasn't been a significant number (indeed, it may be zero) of prosecutions of individual shop-keepers.

What the shops are attempting to do is subvert a ludicrous piece of legislation by over-compliance, and using the "oh, there's this theoretical risk" bit to make it look they're being reasonable. The alcohol licensing legislation was (a) a clear attempt to force everyone under 25 to get an ID card and, more to the point, carry it and (b) an attempt to look "tough on underage drinking" when the changes wrought in the early Blair years massively increased alcohol disorder and (c) a job creation scheme for local authority inspectors, who were seen as a bloc vote.

The shops don't want to do the government's dirty work for them, especially being a recruiting sergeant for ID Cards, so are behaving to the letter but not the spirit of the law to make it ridiculous. I suspect that, once May works up the political enthusiasm, it will get burnt in the red-tape bonfire.

tokyonambu · 21/09/2010 07:57

Sorry, "individual shop workers".

HowsTheSerenity · 21/09/2010 08:23

I never get asked for id Envy. A friend of mine was refused service at a bar once. It was her round, she was 7 months pregnant (and drinking oj) and was told that she could not buy alcohol as she was pregnant!!!

AnxiousLand · 21/09/2010 14:02

netto - vile

PinkieMinx · 21/09/2010 14:09

DH was refused some beer in ASDA as he was with his eldest DD (young looking 17 at the time) in case he was buying it for her!! Beyond ridiculous! Life becomes more of a 'jobsworth' pain in the arse nanny state every fecking day Angry

Fimbo · 21/09/2010 14:21

A story like that was in our local news too PinkieMinx.

scaryteacher · 21/09/2010 14:32

Tokyo - as I understand it 'Challenge 25' isn't legislation, it's a voluntary code that the shops have signed up to. I obviously look my age, or it could be the basilisk stare with which I fix the cashier as my alcohol goes through, especially when it's kids I've taught who are the cashiers and they know how old I am!

funkychunkymunky · 21/09/2010 14:34

When I was 23 I went to the supermarket with my 16 year old brother. I was buying some wine in with a few other bits. I was asked for ID but hadn't got it on me. She then asked me if db was with me. I said he was and she said that he looked old enough so she'd be happy to serve him! I let them serve him then walked out shaking my head.

I was the one with the car keys in my hand and credit cards in my purse.

bullet234 · 21/09/2010 14:42

It is perfectly legal though for a parent/carer to allow their child between the ages of 5 and 17 to drink in their home. I mean, I personally wouldn't let Ds1 and Ds2 drink alcohol at all until they were much older than they are now, but I'd be legally ok to do so. So when the supermarkets refuse alcohol to be sold to a parent in case they might then give some to their 17 year old offspring in their home, they are preventing them from doing something they are legally entitled to do.

wingandprayer · 21/09/2010 14:44

It is not the member of staff that gets prosecuted and fined, it's the shop, no matter what the employer in question threatens.

How do I know? Because DH could have been jailed last year when stupid woman who works for him sold fireworks to an underage girl and it's the same Trading Standards process.

Yes, the person who sells the alcohol or whatever may lose their job providing the employer can prove that they were appropriately trained and not given false ID, but that's the end of their liability. Employer risks fine, prosecution and revocation of licence.

I would imagine supermarkets usually tell their staff they will be liable for fine to scare the living crap out of them and make sure they take it seriously. But as someone else posted, have you ever seen or heard a memeber of staff being personally charged with selling alcohol to minors unless it was part of some sort of scam?

Swipe left for the next trending thread