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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that if you feel sick enough to not eat your breakfast every weekday morning, then you are dreadfully ill...

35 replies

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:18

And should be spending the evenings resting, not entertaining your friends?

Dd1 thinks IABU. She thinks that I think she is just lying and that I am trying to punish her for lying, when she is not lying. She is sick all the time, but only on a morning. And she was sick on Saturday and Sunday. She just didn't tell me.

OP posts:

ShatnersBassoon · 16/09/2010 16:19

How old is she?

FerminaUrbinoDaza · 16/09/2010 16:19

um, don't want to speak out of turn here, but how old is she? Could she be pregnant?

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:22

I hope not Ferm, she is only 6 . No-one has ever seen this 'sick' we just hear about it. She has always made a full recovery by pick up time. The feeling sick does not prevent her from wanting strawberry milkshakes on the way to school.

OP posts:

FerminaUrbinoDaza · 16/09/2010 16:25

So, how does she find school? Maybe she's being picked on a bit so anxious about the start of the day?

StealthPolarBear · 16/09/2010 16:25

I used to get sick at the thought of having to rush my breakfast. Was quite a bit older though - more like 13 or 14.

ShirleyKnot · 16/09/2010 16:26

So she never has breakfast before school?

I am going to go right against what I think most responses are going to be to this.

I don't like breakfast AT ALL. I don't think I ever really did. The thought of eating a bowl of cereal or anything before 9.00 in the morning just is ICK to me. Now, I know that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and all that, but it honestly tastes like cardboard (no matter what I choose) and is really unpleasant.

I have a banana or something at about 9ish and then I'm ok.

I know you're probably worried about her not eating breakfast, but maybe you could find out if she suffers from the same thing as I do, and maybe reach a compromise with her?

It seems unfair to punish her for something that she can't really help.

philmassive · 16/09/2010 16:28

Well I was a bit older than 6 but I felt 'sick' every morning in an attempt to get out of school because I was being bullied. I hope that this isn't the case for your dd but I wonder if it's worth gently questioning her. My bet is that there's something at school she's not happy with and she's hoping you'll keep her off.

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 16/09/2010 16:28

I feel sick every morning until about 9am, but this has been going on for years. Some people like me are just weird

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:30

She is given around 30-40 minutes to eat her cereal. We went through this last year. She was actually sent home from school last year, for being 'sick'. She asked if she could have a cream cake on her way home

I have spoken to the school and according to them she has a small, but close group of friends, although she is still happy to involve children from outside of this group. She manages the work well and is not struggling at all. They haven't witnessed or heard of any bullying and her group of friends is usually central during playtime games.

She is either just trying it on or having her friend around every day is far too tiring for me her.

OP posts:

herbietea · 16/09/2010 16:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

bruffin · 16/09/2010 16:31

I can't eat breakfast either. I never ate until I got to work and had something at my desk. If I am home I am usually up for quite a while before I eat. My DD is similar and I don't force her to have breakfast.

ElizabethWakefield · 16/09/2010 16:31

I used to be like that, i couldn't eat breakfast in the morning before school ever, i had daily battles and it was hell, it genuinely did make me feel sick. Even now i still can't eat early in the morning. I will have something in work at my desk about 9.30am

DD is the same, she is almost 10 and i could genuinely count on one hand the amount of times that she has eaten a breakfast on a school morning.

I don't even try and force her, as I remember the feeling, so she eats at break at school and is perfectly healthy.

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:34

I should point out she asks for breakfast, she eats breakfast, while she is complaining about feeling sick

She is just a pain in the arse trying it on imo. Her younger sister is still at home during the day.

OP posts:

ShirleyKnot · 16/09/2010 16:34

It takes her 30-40 minutes to eat a bowl of cereal?

Have you asked her if she just doesn't like eating first thing?

Because you could put a bowl of cereal in front of me at 6.00 in the morning and leave me there until 9.00 and I still wouldn't want it!

ShirleyKnot · 16/09/2010 16:37

oh x posted.

Nice to see I'm not the only one in the world who hates breakfast.

I wonder if she's seeking some attention from you then? You say you have a younger DD? Are mornings v fraught?

PandaEis · 16/09/2010 16:38

shirley i cant bear breakfast (or anything else) before about 9:30am as i feel ill before then and i have always been this was as far back as i remember so i will join you over here

shiney how about packing some fruit or something she can snack on at break time?? or might it be the cereal she is being offered arent the ones she likes??

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:39

Shirley, she is a slow eater and is very easily distracted by the dog/cat/her sister/dust bunnies/thin air etc.

She has the option not to eat it. No-one forces her to eat. We gave up trying to get dd1 to eat anything substantial years ago (she has seen a pead about her eating/weight all is fine) although she is doing much better with meals now than she used to. And can manage breakfast on weekends easily enough. Usually getting up at the crack of dawn to make it herself. It's only monday to friday she seems to have this problem.

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Alouiseg · 16/09/2010 16:40

I was like this as a very young child, I didn't properly eat breakfast Monday to Friday till I was at work and could go out to breakfast at about 9am.

Ds2 can only eat breakfast at weekends, he needs to be awake for ages till he fancies eating. I send him to school with a ham and cheese croissant that he eats at break time. The only thing he wants in the morning is a yakult. He's been like that for as long as I can remember.

LadySanders · 16/09/2010 16:44

ds1 went through a long stage of this when he started school in year 1. always felt sick in mornings. wasn't particularly having problems at school, other than just settling into new routine/discipline etc... but was obviously a bit nervous about it.

ALSO, sorry if this is TMI, but he hated (and still hates) the thought of needing to poo at school.. .and i suspect didn't want to eat anything before he went in case he needed to

ShirleyKnot · 16/09/2010 16:44

So if you read the other responses the not eating thing is really common, but that doesn't seem to be the issue that you're asking about. So is it just that it's irritating because she is complaining of having been sick, even though you know she hasn't been?

OK, you can't punish her for that. There's something else going on.

And did you say that she has friends round every night of the week?

perfumedlife · 16/09/2010 16:47

I wouldn't worry about it. Let her go to school hungry, she will most likely wolf down her packed lunch or school lunch.

I'm another one who can't eat until I've been up for an hour or two, always was. And I cannot abide milk.

mamatomany · 16/09/2010 16:47

"They haven't witnessed or heard of any bullying and her group of friends is usually central during playtime games."

They never do in my experience, I was told DD1's best friend in the world was child X, I invited child X around for tea, took her out with us on trips, had the entire family around for a BBQ. Turns out child X was torturing DD1 on the sly.

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:50

The girl who lives across the street from us is around here most nights or they play out together. She is at a party tonight anyway (the friend) and has already told dd1 she can't play today.

That might be something that is bothering her LS, she has issues in the bowel department in the past. I'll talk to her about that.

My issue with her is that she is complaining o the teachers, daily, that she feels sick. Throughout the day, but she is fine to ask for ice cream on the way home . She whinges and whines at me every morning about she feels sick and if I send her to school she will tell the teacher she feels sick and she will be sent home and I will be in trouble for making her go to school when she is poorly , but yet, she feels well enough to ask for cake in the shop on the way to school.

We have already looked into every possible angle for her being genuinely ill/having issues at school.

OP posts:

mamatomany · 16/09/2010 16:54

I should just ignore it then, if she gets a reaction from you'll she'll keep it up, easier said than done though.

Original poster

ShinyAndNew · 16/09/2010 16:55

mamatomany, she invites her school friends here herself and/or invites herself to their house. She has even been camping with one of them.

She also calls for the girl across the street herself and misses her when she goes away. So there are no issues there either.

She has admitted to being the bully in the past . But that is sorted out now and she is good friends with her victim now and was made to apologise.

And I don't force her to eat breakfast. she can leave it if she wishes. On a weekend the first thing she does is raid the fridge/cereal cupboard.

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