to be ashamed of my American accent?

[DameYankee]

It's not so bad living here in Scotland, but when I go down to the inlaw's in Manchester, I feel acutely aware of my horrible American accent. The Scots don't seem to mind so much (I think they assume I'm Canadian?) but the English do. I used to live in Gloucester, and it was pretty apparent that having an American accent really annoys a lot of people because we're so loud. Also, when people hear my accent, they pretty much assume that whatever I'm saying must be ignorant.

I don't blame people for thinking this of Americans, which is why I'm ashamed of it.

I was reminded of this when I just now registered a nickname to post. For some reason, I picked "DameYankee" and then, after it was too late, I thought of why that may have been a mistake. "You had the chance, so long as you remembered to spell words correctly, to not come across as an American, and instead you went and announced yourself as one!"

I've also thought of trying to change my accent. I have a stubborn midwest/Southern accent, and haven't picked up anything of the Scottish accent after years of living here. I don't know if one goes to an acting coach for that sort of thing, or what.

Anyway, am I being unreasonable, or do you think there could be wisdom in trying to blend in a bit better?

I wouldn't worry about your kids - there are a family of Americans at DD's nursery and all the other kids are practically in awe of their accents. I think a lot of young children believe America to be the coolest place on earth, probably because your culture influences ours immensely.

Of course YABU. Your post made me :( and, as your fellow American living abroad, just slightly hurt.

I have been as disgusted as anyone and at times deeply ashamed of our government's actions during the Bush era (and also at times before and since). I literally wept in 2004 when we re-elected that idiot and his evil puppet master Dick Cheney for a second term. I did feel ashamed of our country on that day, and for a good while afterward.

But I also wept with joy and pride when we elected Barack Hussein Obama, and again when we finally passed a reasonable (if watered down) health care bill.

I do a lot of weeping, I guess!

Anyway as others have said there is lots and lots of good in America and lots and lots of bad, because it's a huge country with a huge population and it has lots and lots of everything.

I've lived in Ireland for ten years and still have a strong New England accent with no 'r's and 'o's that sound like 'aw'. People do comment on it and very occassionally say something mean or expect me account for every evil or tasteless trend that America has inflicted on the world, and that can grate. But I am generally a kind and reasonably intelligent person, and I would like to think that if someone had a generalized dislike of Americans before meeting me, they might change their mind once getting to know me. Surely trying to change people's minds about "all Americans" is better than trying to change your own identity?

I do speak too loudly, and have the piss taken out of me all the time for it by my Irish dh and my friends. I have heard that studies have been done that show that people from large countries with open spaces (like the US and Australia) tend to speak more loudly in general. I forget the reason for the correlation. I think in my case it's just because when I was growing up my mostly-deaf Nana came to live with us.

chin up chuck

do what i do

whenever anyone says anything passive agressive/critical, respond with 'i know - isn't it faaaaabulous?'

fwiw i am canadian and spent my first year teaching having 'blame canada' from the south park film sung to me by year 9 boys until even they got sick of it

I love accents, pretty much all of them. Be proud of yours, you silly goose.

I love accents esp american and wish i had an accent of my own.

cloudydays i love your reason for talking loudly!

why don't you have an accent sharbie?

just don't - from right in central southern england - 10 miles one way i'd be a farmer 10 miles the other way i'd be slightly cockney-ish

it is still an accent though

i can't hear it

Dh and I are from California. I have the standard California accent (which is the 'media' accent as actors and news anchors learn it for TV), and DH has a very strong "valley girl" accent since he is from Orange County and says 'dude' 'babe' and 'awesome' a lot and he is a perfectly sweet and intelligent man.

There were a LOT of times in public that I just kept my mouth shut because as soon as strangers ascertained I was American they thought it was appropriate to grill me about every foreign policy descision that my home country had ever made, and whatever gaff-of-the-minute happened to be in the news. Despite there being upwards of 330 million Americans in the world I was expected to account for the actions of each and every one. Strangers on the train/tube would interupt DH and I mid-conversation so that they could ask us how we could possibly vote for our president (not bothering to ask whether either of us actually had). So I just didn't talk very much unless I was around friends.

It didn't matter though. I was told that even if I adopted all local styles of dress/hair/makeup etc I would always look American and stand out for it.

I never picked up a British accent though, except for ordering sandwiches because I hate repeating myself. Living in London made my drawl more pronounced because it was a little bit of my heritage (Americans have one you know). I couldn't even bring myself to try to 'do' a British accent because it seemed rude.

And I agree with Tee2072 that something being 'American' is often used in a derogatory fashion. I've had people say they wouldn't let their children who can't read yet have certain books, to my face, because the phrasing was 'too American.' A coworker used to put on an American accent whenever he was trying to sound stupid, but then, he insisted that most Americans have British ancestry, so he was seventeen shades of ignorant anyway. You can frequently find threads on here of people complaining that they hate certain phrases because they are so American.

No one thing sets it off, but I agree that they do build up to a point where there were moments I wished I could feel 'normal' when talking to people instead of always being judged ignorant based the country where I was born, through no fault of my own,

I love American accents, love America and certainly don't assume Americans are ignorant.

Little hijack if I may: I can't help speaking with a drawl when I speak to them (have American SIL and nieces so it happens fairly regularly). Is this offensive?

Tee - people only shudder at Americanisms when used by non-Americans, I think. God, I'd have loved to have had an American boyfriend. Imagine someone legitimately calling you "Honey" or "Sugar" and it not sounding wrong.

i always think that americans living over here must be very smart to want to live in our country

Othersideofthechannel only when the things you are saying are mean and the implication is that these mean things apply because they are American

BTW, I found that generally, people in other countries, particularly France and Germany often complimented me on my accent. Admittedly this was ten years ago (pre-Bush) and I was a much prettier young lady who already knew a smattering of French, German, Spanish, and Italian

said I always thought it would be fab to have a boyfriend who could call me "Darling" without it sounding wrong

See, marenmj has just made my point - imagine having a Californian boyfriend who can say "awesome", "dude" and "babe" and get away with it.

DameYankee, I speak Estuary (ie. common) and don't care what anyone else thinks. If they judge me by how I speak that really is their problem, not mine.

FWIW my dc watch so much American telly that they probably sound more American than your dc do! My mum has loads of US friends too, so I find it really friendly to hear an Americal voice.

Don't let it bother you.

WHAT? This is madness! You eat differently? Never have I heard such a thing! You'll have to change that, but you can keep the accent!

Thanks marenmj.
Do you ever notice people mimicking your accent in this way? (I don't know if SIL hasn't noticed or is too polite to say anything.)

But it has to be "Darlin'" surely? I'm thinking Bruce Springsteen's voice here

Maren, my dh is a cockney and if he calls anyone 'darling' it's actually 'darlin' and he sounds like a dodgy market stall trader.

but that's the problem, said, he was roundly mocked for it :(

othersideofthechannel, only the coworker I mentioned and a couple of exceptionally rude strangers. I don't think it's the sort of thing someone could unintentionally make offensive. Those people were trying to get a rise out of me.

oh, but I thought dodgy market stall traders calling people 'darlin' was pretty adorable too. Hmm, apparently my standards are pretty low in the "darling" department.