to think my mil is out of order??

[mirandathree]

my ds started secondary school today and she hasnt rang to wish him luck nor has she rang tonight to see how he is....think I am spoilt with my parents and siblings who all rang to wish him all the best.....she is generally a selfish person at the best of times so my dh is not surprised but I still feel really narked at her!

YABU

Do you know why she hasn't rung? Most probably it is as you've said, but wouldn't you feel like a heel if it turned out she was in hospital on life support or summink?

hmm, I feel your pain, but other people's lives do NOT revolve around your children. Sorry!

Wow, I must be selfish as I didn't ring any of my sisters up when their DC started school.... .

Long shot here but maybe she forgot!

Did your DS call her to let her know how the day went? Or did he not really give much of a toss about it?

YABU.

YABU

Oh yeah, and YABU

Did you remind her (within the last few days) that he's starting a new school.?
Did you tell her how important it is to him?
Might she ring later to find out how his first week went?

YABU - it's just a new school term.

A big deal for you, not such a big deal for her. And it's only the first day - maybe she'll phone on Friday to see how his first week went?

really? i'm fascinated that people have so little in their lives to get cross over that they pick on, well, non-events really...

how the other half lives, eh?

Face the fact that your children are not very exciting to everyone else.

YANBU to feel hurt, I have the opposite to you, MIL always does nice things, just went to Canada for 2 weeks and she left both DH lovely cards telling them they light her life up and lovely pressies. My Mother never rings them,or even asks about them when on the phone to me and I feel hurt that she doesn't bother.

rotool - GASP! Your MIL has two DHs?

oops!!!

I think I might have remembered my first dn's first day at school, but the rest all passed in a big blur. I was shocked to find out today that youngest DN is in the Juniors already given that he is only 6 months older than dd, who only started primary in Belgium last week.

And my sister only phoned today, nearly a week on, to see how dd got on. I am not mortally offended by this.

at rotool - I see your MIL's secret is out. No wonder she fled to Canada.

yab wildly unreasonable
did your ds notice/care?
or are you just the type who is looking for a reason to fall out with the MIL?

YABU. Your family do things one way, your MIL does things a different way but that is not wrong.

yabu
maybe she has a life

Still don't think YABU, everyone has different expections... do you ring her, email etc when things are happening in her life? If so it is natural that you would expect her to take an interest in you and your families lives.

My fil forgot my ds's birthday today, but I just think its cos he has no-one to remind him of such things since he left my mil!!

No biggy, just one of those things!

rotool, it may be natural that the OP expects her IL to take the same interest as she does, but it is not reasonable. It is grossly unfair to expect that, if you choose to share every tiny detail of your life with everyone else, that everyone else should reciprocate.

I don't think any of my GPs called me when I started school (primary or secondary). I think it is possible for everyone to be a little TOO involved in each other's minutiae. What does your DH think...

Goodness me! I don't know anyone who gives a toss about any children starting school except their own. I certainly have no idea when my nephews did, although I would have been happy to RECEIVE their call if they felt like talking about it.

Remember miranda, even though your children are the most special thing for you, the rest of the World does not share your interest in their minutiae.