Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have reported my "friend" for benefit fraud

312 replies

buttercupp · 06/09/2010 13:27

ok so cant go into too much detail for obvious reasons but i have a friend (not know for long but lives near me) and i have been debating for a while now whether to report her or not for living with her partner who is also claiming as living alone.

so today i have done it finally after being fed up of hearing what other electrical applicance they have bought with the stupid amount of money they have been given when my DH is out at work slogging his guts out just to make ends meet.

The reason i havent done it before is like i say she is supposed to be my friend,we have had nights out together and she has a baby so have felt a bit bad in that respect too but i knew i had to do the right thing.
would i be a hypocrite to continue to be her friend or should i avoid her from now on? i do like the girl just dont agree with what she was doing.and anyone know what will happen now i have reported her?

OP posts:
burgerandchipswithredsauce · 08/09/2010 00:01

LadyBiscuit Are you sure about that? My next door neighbour will tell all and sundry how he manages to claim DLA for a bad back yet is able to work as a builder every day of the week - thus committing benefit fraud. (In fact he brags that he is raking it in and questions why people go to work legitimatally!)

What he is yet to discover is that I and most of the people living in our street have reported him. The fraud squad car has been parked down our street every day for the past two weeks and everyone knows it except him lolololol. I am sure he will soon know about it though because the man in the car has been busy taking pics of when he leaves the house and when he returns. I and everyone else in the street cannot wait for him to get his comeuppance.

justsue · 08/09/2010 00:18

YABU what a nasty society we are becoming when we report people we THINK are cheating the system. If we know for definite then fine. There are many stories in the papers about benefit cheats and personally I think they are wrong but why report a FRIEND..

Even if you had absolute proof she was cheating the system why would you report her. You are no friend of hers and wether or not she is cheating, has more than you etc you are bang out of order.

burgerandchipswithredsauce · 08/09/2010 00:23

JustSue I wonder why it is that you think "stories" reported in the papers about benefit fraud are wrong? Do you know all the intimate details of the potential fraudsters personally?

anonymosity · 08/09/2010 00:29

Justsue has a valid point. Isn't the habit of reporting people without substantial evidence the same kind of behaviors witnessed during McCarthyism, and in Germany during the World Wars?

Basically, its very, very low.

justsue · 08/09/2010 00:54

Burgerandchips: Sorry I wrongly phrased about stories in the papers. If they are true then yes they are wrong no doubt about it. No of course I dont know any intimate details I only read what is written in the papers. What I was saying is if you "think" someone is cheating and especially a "friend" then why report them unless you have hard facts. What if the OP'S "friend" had been given some money by family, perhaps someone had died etc. Get the facts first that is all I am saying. I would hate to think that I have "friends" like this. So yes OP is absolutley bloody out of order I am sorry but who would want a friend like that. This sort of thing is wrong.

expatinscotland · 08/09/2010 01:11

it's all messed up, but i still wouldn't have reported her, tbh.

gtamom · 08/09/2010 04:04

dragonfly68 Tue 07-Sep-10 09:25:20

'people have seen the tv arriving and you'll be investigated'

HELLO!!!!!! hate to burst your little bubble....BUT ...benefit claimants can still BUY A BRAND NEW TV!!!!!

most bloody uninformed,stupid thing i have read on here!!! jesus!!

Yes, I realize they can save up for one, or it could be a gift from someone. What I was trying to say, was she would have been kinder to let the woman know she was going to be ratted out, so she could do something to recify the situation. Like let welfare know the bf had moved in, or something.
I would have minded my own business personally. I don't agree with dishonesty, but I don't want to cause trouble for a mother and her children either.

gtamom · 08/09/2010 04:11

I don't live in a little bubble at all, believe me. Wish I could at times. My post may not have been perfect advice, but was just a suggestion that a letter may have been a better idea than reporting her.

Original poster
buttercupp · 08/09/2010 07:14

i cannot go into the reasons why but as i have said before I DONT THINK, I KNOW! 110% and like other posters have said,even if i didnt then they have nothing to worry about.

if i was jealous i would do the same myself,no?

OP posts:
knickers0nmyhead · 08/09/2010 08:19

I have a 32'' tv on wall...

Quick everyone get reporting me!

Mingg · 08/09/2010 09:45

Truly amazed at the number of people thinking benefit fraud should not be reported...

meltedchocolate · 08/09/2010 09:45

Sorry to jump in late but whoever said that you don't get enough when you are on benifits (I have been on as a couple and now as single) is mistaken or just really bad at budgeting! I have afforded a few things since being on benifits through careful budgeting and deciding what I do want and what I could do without.

I wouldn't report a friend personally but can understand the OPs annoyance. Benifit fraud is theft like any other.

That is all.

ccpccp · 08/09/2010 09:55

IB claims for bad back etc are very common.

The new IB test was brought in under Labour Edam. Even they admitted IB fraud is high.

(have we had this conversation before? Just had a big flash of deja vu)

I cant comment on how tough or fair the test is, other than to say as a deterrant it is very effective. Something like half of all people who were told they had to take the test immediately withdrew their claims for IB assessment. Hopefully it will leave the genuine claimants with more money to split between them.

Jackstini · 08/09/2010 11:13

Tegan yes you should report them

lucielooo · 08/09/2010 11:30

YABU - Why do people think it is so morally applaudable to be completely disloyal to a friend?

It's not courage to phone up and get someone into trouble it's spite. Courage would have been to approach her about it directly not deliberately got her into trouble behind her back.. Especially as OP freely admits that she's annoyed by it because her DH is out of work and they don't have much.

I don't think benefit cheating is ok, but I loathe the idea that the government has all spying on each other and stabbing each other in the back much more.

LadyBiscuit · 08/09/2010 11:33

I'm much more concerned about the huge sums that companies owe the government through their complicated tax wheezes that the few people who are fraudulently claiming benefits. And I agree absolutely lucieloo - this snitching society that is developing is revolting.

CheekyLittleSox · 08/09/2010 11:34

Buttercup have they bought the TV or is it rented like from Brighthouse or BAYV??

Sounds like your jealous to me. I dont agree with benefit fraud but when your on benefits its bloody hard work trying to survive on what LITTLE amount you get. We are on benefits at the moment and we get paid on a Wednesday and its gone by friday. Sat/Sun/ Mon/Tues is bloody hard work.

God forbid it never happens to you.

CheekyLittleSox · 08/09/2010 11:36

Can i just say i have a rented TV, from BAYV. BUT if we dont have the money to put in the back of the tv, we cannot watch tv at all. Life on benefits isnt as rosy as what people make it out to be. If i would have known my husband was to have being laid off from work due to health reason we wouldnt have bought a new tv and would have carried on with our broken one, but life changes and QUICK!

ccpccp · 08/09/2010 12:21

LadyBiscuit - I love the way its 'huge sums' when it comes to corportate tax avoidance, and 'a few people' when it comes to benefit cheats.

TheJollyPirate · 08/09/2010 12:34

Brighthouse is a boon to some people who cannot afford to buy things outright. When I was really broke a few years ago and my fridge broke down I didn't even have the money to buy a second hand one. Instead I bought one through Brighthouse (I think - or similar - can't be clear) who allowed me to pay weekly. I paid over the odds and did not have great choice. On the other hand I still have the fridge 7 years on....

At the time I was working but H had been laid off so was on £52 a week. My salary paid mortgage/council tax etc. We had a baby and needed a fridge - anyone looking in from the outside might have wondered how we afforded it though. Answer = we didn't - no deposit and low payments until it was paid off.

Mingg · 08/09/2010 12:35

Why is it that on these threads the type of tv becomes more important than the fact that benefit fraud is a crime - whether or not you have a plasma tv and how you got it is irrelevant

cashmygold · 08/09/2010 12:58

Well said nickelbabe.

emmyloulou · 08/09/2010 13:00

I love all the posts, "I don't agree with benefit fraud......but I wouldn't report it".

How does that work then on peoples moral compass, "I don't agree with assault, but I wouldn't report it".

How messed up can you get and yes I have survived on benefits before without resorting to crime.

It's misplaced loyalty I am afraid peeps. if you are a claimant they steal out of the pot and make it harder for you, if you are a tax payer they steal your cash in the form of taxes, obviously you'd all be sooooo understanding if they helped themselves to your purse Hmm

JustAnother · 08/09/2010 13:07

well done!

cashmygold · 08/09/2010 13:48

Living on benefits is not suppose to be a bed of roses. I think a hugh problem is that people are beginning to have a misconception regarding the fine line between necessities and want.

IMHO i don't believe that having access to the internet at home is a necessity, when one can easiliy go to a public library. But it is widely common for benefit claimants to have this.

I think places such as bright house should be banned as it plays on people's desires of want rather than need. What ever happened to living within your own means?

Benefits (in some cases) allows people to accept a low standard of living (basically just getting by)

Therefore they don't make the effort of seeking employment. Places like bright has fuel this attitude i.e. getting something for nothing.