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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to have found this strange house styling technique hilarious?

52 replies

chaostrulyreigns · 31/08/2010 22:14

Went to view a house with a friend at 5 o'clock on friday.

Her dining table was set up with crockery for 6 and there was a lovely smell of some sort of meaty dish cooking, so we assumed she was expecting guests.

Went for second visit this afternoon (her DH working away so I'm helping her pick) - table was still set up, so we worked out it was all for HyacinthBucketEffect.

Man, we got uncontrollable giggles, stifling them just resulted in us snortingand desperately trying to avoid eye contact.

Now putting a dinner service as gorgeous as <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=common.csnstores.com/common/products/FRA/FRA1049_l.jpg&imgrefurl=cookware.guidestobuy.com/cookware-essentials/franciscan-apple-28-piece-dinnerware-set/&usg=__Up7iVasduWu7eDC9gvIoxORJUCA=&h=450&w=450&sz=68&hl=en&start=186&zoom=1&tbnid=ekSY3tgFzhH1jM:&tbnh=111&tbnw=125&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dfruit%2Bdinnerware%2Bsets%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26rlz%3D1T4HPNN_enGB359GB359%26biw%3D1106%26bih%3D533%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C3881&um=1&itbs=1&ei=G3B9TNH1M8KSjAfOm9zSDg&biw=1106&bih=533&iact=rc&dur=328&oei=8299TMCUGJXNjAf6u6TTDg&esq=10&page=10&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:18,s:186&tx=75&ty=73" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this all set up for a dinner party is not going to be the thing that clinches the sale is it?

What tactics have you witnessed that have made you giggle?

OP posts:
Spacehopper5 · 31/08/2010 22:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

backwardpossom · 31/08/2010 22:19

Hmm, at least they made an effort... We went to view a house and there was underwear hanging on the radiators to dry. And don't even get me started on the fag burns and ash around the bath. Which was a lovely shade of avocado. Yeurgh, I feel the urge to go and wash my hands just thinking about it!

Blondeshavemorefun · 31/08/2010 22:23

least they made an effort

we have seen houses that

have a huge poo unflushed in the toilet Hmm

period bloody knickers on the floor Shock

a dog that was determined to shag my leg Biscuit

Minxie1977 · 31/08/2010 22:23

YAB a bit U - they want to sell a house. We were told to put a duster on radiator for fresh polish smell & fresh coffee on to entice buyers! I would have had a snarfle though Grin

bumpybecky · 31/08/2010 22:25

we looked at one house where the couple had split up and the man was living there and obviously didn't want to sell. It was stupidly cluttered and truly filthy all over and worst of all there were porn magazine pictures stuck up on the walls in the bathroom Shock

chaostrulyreigns · 31/08/2010 22:28

The question is bumpyb - what were they stuck up with?

OP posts:
bumpybecky · 31/08/2010 22:31

I didn't look closely enough to find out! Shock

ThatVikRinA22 · 31/08/2010 22:32

i set my table up at christmas. and i leave it like that for days and days cos i like it. and i dont have guests.

but yanbu. its a little desperate isnt it! poor women maybe is getting desperate to sell - its crap out there at the min. id put mine up if i thought there was a snowballs chance in hell of it selling.

deepdarkwood · 31/08/2010 22:33

When selling our London flat, we did tend to sit in the courtyard garden with a bottle of wine, and some olives in a fancy bowl (even though I hate the fuckers) - but to be fair to us, we only do this when we were around... (good excuse to open a bottle...)

JudyPink · 31/08/2010 22:34

Crikey! The worst thing that happened when we were last looking for a house was view a really crooked house - it was so crooked you fell into the wall as you walked up the stairs... anyway, the Estate Agent said head on upstairs. The house was an absolute tip - we went straight into the main bedroom, muttering about the piles and piles and piles of dirty clothes on the floor to find the woman of the house in bed in a silky nightie. It was 2 in the afternoon. I was absolutely mortified. I cannot even think who she was expecting!

tallwivglasses · 31/08/2010 22:36

Oh yes, the scent of coffee...and baking bread! An easel with a half-finished painting on it (which never had another brush-stroke added to it over our 3 visits), 2 gorgeous standard lamps - with no sockets to plug them into.
Smile at 'snarfle'

still, better than another house with still-sleeping students under their stinking duvets!

MumInBeds · 31/08/2010 22:39

I guess it is inspired from the TV programmes like '60 Minute Makeover'. The set table thing on there has always puzzled me.

Spinaroo · 31/08/2010 22:42

I went to see one where the vendor had tried to cover up the smell of smoke create a pleasant atmosphere by burning peach (bloody peach!!!!!!!)joss sticks!

On a better day I may have forgiven her but I was in the early stages of pregnancy where even nice smells were offensive to me. This one made me want to puke and even now I can gag at the thought of it.

sunfunandmum · 31/08/2010 22:45

The opposite to deepdark wood, one place we went to, the lady of the house spent the whole viewing lying on the sofa watching daytime telly in her dressing gown as the estate agent showed us round. She waved us out of the way when we happened to stand in front of it. Not very inspiring!

Blondeshavemorefun · 31/08/2010 22:45

also had the smells of peach air freshner and coffee

both which i cant stand and tbh put me off the house

where homemade bread is lovely

QueeferSutherland · 31/08/2010 22:47

That was one of Justin & Colin's tricks wasn't it? Apparently a set table was "aspirational".

littledawley · 31/08/2010 22:52

I did once have a house viewing at five pm when we really did have people coming over so my table was laid beautifully Blush
I did point out that it really, really wasn't for show!!

zandy · 31/08/2010 22:55

We viewed a house where a man was dismantling a motobike in the living room.

We didn't buy it.

Valpollicella · 31/08/2010 22:59

Love it.

Better than the folks who left their random (sublet) tenant to let us in to view the property...

Envy
BoffinMum · 31/08/2010 22:59

We viewed a house once where some older people had been told by their daughter that you should paint everything cream to make the house look bigger.

So they invested in a vat of magnolia emulsion and slopped it ALL OVER EVERYTHING including the original features, the oak front door, window frames, everything.

At least the paint almost covered up the smell of the fag smoke ...

CaptainNancy · 31/08/2010 23:04

I saw a tent laid out like that this weekend!
Seriously- whole "dinner party" set-up... during the day! Confused They had candlesticks and everything...

chaostrulyreigns · 01/09/2010 09:26

CaptainN I have to ask - where and why and how? Grin

OP posts:
kreecherlivesupstairs · 01/09/2010 09:31

I came to the UK to look at some houses in May. I saw some marvellous things including the porn by the bed, a dog turd in a kitchen and an obviously terminal old person in bed. We made an offer on a normal house.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 01/09/2010 09:32

Just realised how snide that sounded, insinuating that a very poorly person was marvellous. In fact, it was sad. Being shown around by a woman desperate to sell who was making a racket next to sick person.

Deliaskis · 01/09/2010 09:34

Oooh we viewed loads of apartment in Austria that had tables set up, but not just with 'normal' dinner party stuff, but with totally kitschy Austrian hand painted beer steins with metal lids etc. that nobody actually uses in real life, as well as an actual basket of bread rolls.

Also viewed a place that an old couple were selling with everything in it, and I mean everything. It was their holiday flat but they couldn't manage the journey anymore and were downsizing back at home (in Germany) so literally had no room for all their stuff, so the dear old lady insisted on showing us everything, inviting us to count the teaspoons (23), switching the coffee machine on and off, showing us the two unopened boxes of tissues that they would be leaving, lifting the lid off the washing basket to show us inside (?), and insisting she really was including all of the 50 yr old flannel bedding in the price of the apartment.

Her husband bless him, was poised the whole time out on the balcony ready to demonstrate the cushions for the patio furniture, after which we followed him down to the garage where he also demonstrated the easy no-bump park system (a piece of wood on the floor 3 feet short of the wall to stop your wheels before you hit the wall).

We laughed for about an hour afterwards, and then felt mean because the couple were actually quite sweet.

D

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