Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To want to punch my husband in the face for being such a effing twat/asshole/selfish bastard!!

73 replies

lilysmummy2007 · 30/08/2010 13:55

We've done nothing all weekend,I cant remember the last time we did something other than stay home and watch crappy movies. I want to go to the FREE Carnival at Notting hill, and he is being a twat bag about it, he doesnt want to go because he has to work, at 11pm tonight!! Its 2 pm FFS!! We could be back before 7pm as we live one bus ride away and I want DD to see the floats and cultural experiences ( I am from Trinidad, where the Carnival originates from). I feel a really big fight coming on and I really dont want to start my week off with the hassle!! Its not just this, he is such a stupid git when it comes to going places and is so antisocial when we do go out, I dont even bother asking anymore! This is just pissing me of as DD is bored indoors and i would feel much safer if he went with us. I am going either way but its just really annoying that we cant do things as a family because he is being a dickhead!!

OP posts:

pagwatch · 30/08/2010 14:41

ROFL at someone who dosen't want to punch her Dh or call him an effing twat being 'the perfect wife'

YY - only twatting the cunt standing between me and perfection. So close....

FrameyMcFrame · 30/08/2010 14:41

yes but this is a forum used by mostly Mums and I'm sure we all feel like slagging off our Dp/Dhs from time to time.
Of course her husband should get up off his arse and do something, especially go to Notting Hill Carnival which is a culturally important festival!!!

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 30/08/2010 14:42

TBH, i would call him thats to his face, i wazs in full rant mode and just needed to vent! Ok maybe my colourful language was a bit too much, but i am very very annoyed

OP posts:

Minxie1977 · 30/08/2010 14:44

You swear at your DH

mustrun · 30/08/2010 14:46

If you'd call him that to his face, then ok that means your thread title was normal for your world, so that kind of self justifies it in a weird way. I just hope to god you're not having these arguments in front of your dd, or she'll be learning some very interesting language! Just thinking of my neighbours, who use far worse terminology directly to their kids

Fwiw, if I wanted to go to the carnival, i'd just go, with the kids. Dh working anyway today, but he'd hate the crowds.

rainbowinthesky · 30/08/2010 14:47

How on earth is it okay to have a thread title saying you want to punch your partner in the face for any reason least of all because he doesnt want to go out as he is workign the night. Imagine if this were a bloke posting about his wife.

FrameyMcFrame · 30/08/2010 14:54

Oh ffs, saying punch in the face is a colloquialism, not meant to be taken literally.

deakell · 30/08/2010 14:56

It is not a colloquialism in my world, and nor would it appear, in many others worlds either.
We're on MN, a lot of what is written will obviously be taken at face value

ilovefirelighters · 30/08/2010 14:56

wow! give her a break shes just sounding off! we all do it and thats partly what mumsnet is here for. sometimes mums feel that when they dont ask much from their dh they can occassionally ask for something and demand a cheerful 'yes dear, of course' from them. unfortuanately lifes not like that. personally if its such a battle to get him there, i wouldnt bother, he will be a miserable sod all afternoon! go on your own. have a good time. how old is your dd? is she in a buggy? sounds to me like you want to have a good time and feel you wont be able to if your eyes are 100% on dd so you want to share the resposibility. have a good day go home and make up with hubby!

amberleaf · 30/08/2010 14:57

Maybe he thinks you should have taken your daughter yesterday on .......childrens day?

spikeycow · 30/08/2010 14:57

Um, I'd take my boys to the carnival and I have been before. Any gangs there are a risk to each other only and are not a threat to a mother with children. In fact they'd be more likely to rob you with a man there than without. Just go yourself.

deakell · 30/08/2010 14:58

So let me get this Framey, you don't express shock at OP's language, fair enough. But you express shock at the fact that others find it distasteful?

rainbowinthesky · 30/08/2010 14:59

Not in my world it isnt.

strandedatsea · 30/08/2010 15:03

I thought Notting Hill was fairly family friendly, so if I were you I would go with your dd (doesn't she have any friends you could invite along too, with their parents? If you are a Trinny, they should jump - excuse pun! - at the chance to go with someone who knows about carnivals) and if you start to feel unsafe move to a different area, away from the crowds.

Then when you are feeling calmer, talk to your dh and see if you can come to some sort of compromise about the weekends - eg he does something with you both one day, he gets to relax on the other.

mayorquimby · 30/08/2010 15:24

"Oh ffs, saying punch in the face is a colloquialism, not meant to be taken literally."

People aren't suggesting it is literal. They are however pointing out that a man positing on how he metaphorically wanted to "kick the shit out of my fucking nagging bitch of a wife" would be rightly lambasted and no one would be so misguided to try and defend him with "well he doesn't mean it literally", because even where it is clear that they do not plan on acting such a thing out it is an aggressive and horrible way to talk about someone and shows a clear lack of respect for them, the fact that it is a woman saying it and not a man should make no difference.

belgo · 30/08/2010 15:26

Totally unacceptable thread title, but mumsnet will let it stand as usual.

FrameyMcFrame · 30/08/2010 15:28

deakell, um... yes.

I thought swearing was embraced on mumsnet anyway!
There seems to be far too many 'serious' people on this thread!

I'm going to drag my bastard lazy fucker dp off the sofa now and get him to drive us to the beach and catch the last of the sun!
lillysmummy, I hope you have fun at the carnival with or without your other half.

deakell · 30/08/2010 15:36

Framey, I'm not averse to a good old effing and blinding session on occasion too. But outright verbal abuse and potential violence directed at an individual, isn't really the same thing now is it.

Have a great fucking time and don't get burnt

Vallhala · 30/08/2010 15:54

I just hope that the OP is at Carnival with her son now.

(Seasoned Carnival goer and born and bred Londoner here doesn't think she'll be the only woman with sole charge of a child/children and that there's no reason to panic). :)

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 04/09/2010 09:47

Quick update, i went with DD, had a blast! I did meet some other west indian people at the bus stop and tagged along with them soI had company all the way there, through the carnival and to come home as well. I got home at about 10pm as i saw no need to rush as DH was not with us. He decided to call in work and use me being sick as an excuse to stay home . We got back in plenty of time for him to go to work, I still dont know why he didnt go to work. He said he didnt sleep after we left he was very very tired from watching TV all evening. He now has a diciplinary hearing at work for being absent for no reason.

OP posts:

Cloudbase · 04/09/2010 10:18

Lily,
your DP sounds so much like my ex, that I'm wondering whether there is more to this than just the weekend outings issue?

Is he awkward/unhelpful/uninterested in other areas of your life together? Is he really lovely the rest of the time, or is this part of a bigger pattern?

Fair enough if not, but your being so angry and upset and him sounding so much like my lazy, over-entitled and frankly nasty ex, make me wonder.

Hope I'm wrong, but is this part of a bigger picture? (Glad you had a great day btw)

Original poster

lilysmummy2007 · 04/09/2010 10:28

Cloud, nw that you mention it, he isnt really lovely the rest of the time, he works nights, sleeps all day and does nothing much else. Any outing I want to take DD to, museums etc, I have to do myself, or he would come along but bitch all the way!Maybe i need to take an even closer look at my relationship. I work as well and I find the time to do things with my family, he just doesnt seem to want to participate.

OP posts:

proudnsad · 04/09/2010 10:33

Well I think you're getting closer to the truth now Lily.

I was going to wade in and say my dh opts out of quite a lot of weekend outings largely to sleep/watch sport, but because he's so fantastic and lovely most of the time, it doesn't bother me (and was going to say I would rather stick a hot poker up my arse than go to the carnival).

But if he's a waste of space that's a different issue.

Flip

1 2 3