..to be really pissed off with this woman?

[GreatShatnersGhost]

Apologies in advance for length.
Background. I'm 14 weeks into my first pregnancy. I've been tired the whole time, but it's been getting worse over the last 2 weeks, I feel totally exhausted. I keep getting cold after cold. My back is /killing/ me. (Not literally, but it feels like it.) I'm mood swingy as hell and thoroughly pissed off at the prospect of feeling like shit for the next 6 months, because apparently a lack of "blooming" runs in my family.

I spent my day at work running around our giant new office, up and down a large set of stairs at least twice every hour sorting out problems for morons. I get out of breath so easily at the moment, and would need a few minutes to recover each time. Come 2:45 I sat back in my chair, sighed and started rubbing my back. Then the old cow chimes in "You know dear, pregnancy isn't an illness." No, it's not, but it makes me feel like shit. I'm not precious about it, I'm not an attention seeker, I just feel like shit. AIBU to want to smack her until she feels shitty too?

YANBU, although your hormones are probably affecting you. My mum has the best answer for this sort of thing - not aggressive but sums it up so I usually say "My mother always says - if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".

YANBU. Anyone who calls me 'dear' I am going to look at askance.

I would have beaten her to a pulp for that comment while I was pregnant.

I had a vile pregnancy too - exhausted the whole time and either morning sickness or indegestion the whole way through so I totally feel your pain.

YANBU but you will have to get used to it as people seem to think once you are pregnant you are public property. Some people come out with the most inane shit.

Indigestion fgs.

YANBU
hate it when people say stuff like this.
I've had the same thing said by a bloke at work, I said 'neithers a kick in the balls'.

I was absolutely exhausted at the start. Actually I got more energy around 4/5 months. YANBU. But it's only the start of a lifetime of unwanted, patronising, often-inaccurate advice in my experience My MIL told me to put cereal in bottles for my newborn DD to 'fill her up' I was breast-feeding...

Grrr, I hate the 'pregnancy is not an illness' thing, I had a bloody miserable first pregnancy, including 8 nights in hospital. If anyone says it to you again, offer to tell them all about your haemorrhoids (even if you don't have them). You'd be amazed how fast people can change the subject.

I agree it's only the start though, you will have to practice nodding and smiling (and ignoring).

YANBU. I have felt like absolute shit this pregnancy. My nan has had to have my DS sometimes as I have been too tired to look after him. I am 16 weeks now and I do feel better than I did but I still can't manage a trip around the supermarket, so you may feel better soon.

What did you say??

YANBU tell her to fuck off

Pregnancy was an illness for me.

I was in hospital 11 times in the 9 months I was pg with dd2, not including the 3 weeks before her induction at 37 weeks to save my kidneys!

For some people, pregnancy is shit. I am glad that I will never do it again!

Good to know others would've felt the same.

@domeafavour I smiled with gritted teeth and said "Mhmm." I'm normally very nice but recently find it hard not to be blunt and quite frankly rude! Guess you're all right that I should get used to it.

@DetectivePotato, fortunately I've not been quite so bad. I hope you feel better soon!

"You know dear, pregnancy isn't an illness."
"Neither is being an obnoxious cow but at least I'll stop being pregnant one day."

I've had this said to me too.

My response was "I never said it was. I'm pretty sure you couldn't carry this extra weight around though. Well, not any more than you are, anyway..."

Thankfully, much laughter from other people around diffused the look of shock I got in return. I probably went a bit too far, but couldn't help myself...

I felt better though

soupdragon

Some bloke who I worked with made an insensitive comment when I was pg which being pg left me in tears - he got a talking to by another collegue and apologised.

I also had shit pg. Sick for first 15weeks to the point I put on 0.5kg then kidney infection and admitted. Loved the last 3 months tho

If you felt that crap and were not pregnant you would probably have gone to the doctor and have had a few days off sick to recover by now!!.

I phoned in work and was feeling so ill during my second pregnancy that I could barely speak. I said to my boss "I have hyper hyper...." and she interjected with "hypochondria?". It was in face hypermeresis. Have never forgotten this and never will.

OMG!

How the hell did you not just let out a 'Oh do f& off dear'???

You are to be commended for your restraint. Really!

Nice woman (!). You handled it well, though.

Re the shortness of breath, have you been checked for anaemia?

Lol @SoupDragon!

@werewolf, no I haven't yet but am phoneing (phoning?) for an appointment first thing tomorrow.

Hate that pregnancy is not an illness saying (we even have it quoted in our maternity leave guidelines at work - bless 'em). If you weren't pregnant but were sick several times a day for 6 months it would certainly feel like a bloody illness. The fact that you are pregnant seems to make the fact you feel like shit OK to everyone else!
YAmostdefinitelyNBU

Early pregnancy is just yuck. Yuck Yuck Yuck.

I hate being pregnant, it is a PITA, the whole thing is a fucking design flaw.

Madaboutquavers I LOVE your style!

Another one with grim pregnancies here too. Almost constant nausea, fainting at the drop of a hat etc etc. Thankfully never doing it again! And thankfully I had incredibly supportive and understanding emplyers so didn't have to put up with this sort of nonsense.

Vomit in her bin I say!