MIL knitting tons of clothes for baby in acrylic

[proseccogirl]

I think you are all going to tell me that IABU and I am a snob too, but what the hell....
My MIL hasn't been back to work since she had my DH (33 years ago!), and frankly never seems to me to have enough to do! Since I have been pregnant she has been knitting tons, and tons of clothes for the baby. She is a lovely knitter, and has made things that would be beautiful, but they are all made of really nasty shiny acrylic and other man made fibres. I have asked DH to ask her very politely if she could possibly knit in cotton/wool, and I have done the same, and have even bought large amounts of cotton/bamboo and wool in suitable colours for her to knit with, as I don't want her to be out of pocket. They have far less money than we do and I know that cotton and bamboo and wool are more expensive to buy.
Despite all of this she pitches up with a new acrylic item every time we see them so has obviously decided to ignore our polite requests, and I know she will take the hump massively if I don't dress the baby in one of the every day when once the baby arrives, but I really, really don't want the baby to wear top to toe acrylic all day! All my baby books say that you should dress the baby in natural fibres so that they can keep cool and evaporate sweat effectively etc.
The background to this is that my DH's parents are very working class and I am very upper middle class so I am worried they think I am a snob as it is, and this will make that worse, but equally, I don't want my baby flickering with static electricity the whole time! Or overheating in a nylon baby grow.......!Am I just being a cow?

And my teeth.

As far as I can remember I never really found much opportunity to put DSsin the many hand-knitted cardigans my granny made for them when they were babies. Babies don't really sit about in matinee jackets any more.

They wore the jumpers and things she carried on making when they were toddlers though - and grew out of them pretty quickly.

I have no idea whether they were acrylic or not.

Hopefully the OP will stop treating her baby books as gospel once he/she actually arrives.

Although I would only want to dress my baby in cotton, I think it doesn't really matter for cardigan to be worn outside - they don't come into contact with skin and once it gets into autumn overheating outside not really a problem.

But we got loads of really posh babygros from very rich upper middle class posh friends of DH's parents that were shock horror a mix of cotton and POLYESTER. Thats more of a problem as they were clearly vv expensive and meant to be worn right next to the skin.

But I get the point, so frustrating that she's putting all this effort into something you aren't going to use!

They aren't going to fit for long. So accept them graciously for now, only put baby in for photos but for next winter buy pattern and wool etc and give to her.

FWIW my 4 YO has eczema and will only wear cotton jumpers he finds wool or anything else uncomfortable. He is already very good at being able to tell what is what.

domesticslutery the way these two chew, yeah, I avoid not just handknitted, although I did first start this when a button from my aunt's handknitting was nearly swallowed, so it was handknitting which made me careful, which is a pity.

I think you are so lucky to have a mother in law to knit you lovely things no matter what they are made of. I have no mother or mother in law and would be so grateful to have either. Look at the bigger picture and count your blessings. She means well and is doing a lovely thing for you.

Lol some of those comments! But seriously why dont you buy her the wool say you like the colour or something??

TBH once sleep deprivation hits you probably won't notice or care what baby is wearing... ;-)

I like acrylic purely because I am very irritated by wool and would not wish to handle it in order to put it on baby. Actually that's a point? Maybe MIL is allergic to wool?

Anyway, I did once have an item of baby wear that was beautifully made, but not suitable (it had w ribbon round the neck... it sent my poor heart into spasm at the choking risk!

I'd up the cotton fibre if I were you!

I had DS when I was 19. My best friend's Mum was a bit disappointed for me I know, being quite old fashioned, but never judged, she was lovely. I know she didn't want the same for her daughter, which was fair enough, it wasn't really my choice, accidents happen, but hey ho, one gets on with it..

Anyway, two weeks before I am due to give birth my BF's DM dies suddenly. In her bedroom my BF finds a parcel all wrapped and labelled for me. It contained the most beautifully knitted baby clothes, each piece with satin ribbon running through. I cried when I opened the parcel.

Two years later, just after graduating from Uni my BF found she was expecting - living in sin like me lol. I was so happy to be able to pass those clothes on to her for her baby, which I know she treasured.

And you know what, I have no idea whether they were pure wool or acrylic. They were worn, loved and enjoyed. All I know is that they were made with love and affection, and the best of intentions, and that's all that really matters.

Haven't read any of the intervening posts, sorry. I know. Crap of me.

OP, you are being hormonal and precious and a leetle obsessive, but not entirely unreasonable. Acrylic is a horrible yarn, most of the time (there are superior acrylics on the market now, but most baby yarns seem to be shiny and sweat-inducing).

I'll tell you one good reason why you wouldn't want a baby in acrylic, aesthetic reasons and questionable snobbery aside: it is a fecking fire risk. Most acrylic yarn will melt onto flesh if, god forbid, it catches fire. Wool, on the other hand, will smoulder faintly and go out. Cotton yarn will do this too.

Not suggesting that you're going to allow your new baby to play with matches, etc, but if there's the slightest risk of the baby being in the same room as a fire, an electric bar heater, an ashtray, a candle - forget it.

And yes, it is shiny and sweaty and horrible. I am also a snob, and a yarn snob, and bought my MIL a lot of (expensive) bamboo and cotton and wool yarn when she got knitting. I apologised for my control freakery and my preciousness. She didn't seem to mind.

Ok, have now read other posts. Wish I had before: far more amusing than OP.

OP, something else struck me: if you have to say you are '(very) upper middle class', then you ain't.

Sticking my neck out and risking anti-knitter abuse here, but I never found wool, wool/mix, cotton, bamboo, etc, cardigans knitted for DS hard to wash. Some of them are machine-washable and I don't wash at over 40 anyway. Others were dunked in the sink and then stuck on the clothes airer. No probs. (Ok, the cotton ones took five million years to dry. That's another matter.)

YABU, There is nothing wrong with acrylic and it will wash better than wool. Let her knit with acrylic she actually might not be used to knitting with wool.

Ooh must have missed something as didn't read the entire thread.

BF's DM was privately educated and a Sandhurst wife. Does that make any difference? Still can't remember what wool she used mind so probably not. All I know is that my BF was so fucking happy to have baby clothes knitted by her dear, departed mother that I don't think she'd have cared if they were made of raffia or string!!!

FeedMeSeymour, what a moving story.

I bitterly regret having given away all the things my mum made. She died unexpededly - I guess I assumed she'd always be around to make more if I had another baby.

A close family member had his first baby recently - the first new baby in the family since mum died - and not being able to pass on these things is so sad.

I didn't get the impression that OP was a snob. I think the "very upper middle class" vs "working class" gave background and context to the story. OP perhaps feels a little awkward about her background and wary of being judged by DH's family - I think this can work both ways, not just upper classes looking down on working class but working class pre-judging upper classes as toffs, pretentious, etc.
Now myself I am from Australia originally and am thus class less . But am constantly amazed and amused by the British obsession with pigeon holing people into a particular section of society. Don't really understand it. How does anyone tell what their class is, who defines it? Is it by occupation, background, interests?
But I digress. Actually also wanted to say I thought MIL was BU. I mean why couldn't she knit some items in the wool DIL had chosen? What point is she trying to make - that she won't be dictated to by her snobby pretentious DIL...? I wonder...

So, apparently most people think it's fine for their children to wear acrylic, ungrateful not to value any clothes knitted by grannies, especially multi-coloured dayglo kitted matinee jackets, and any-one who doesn't love hand-knitted acrylic baby clothes is a snob. However, I can count on the fingers of one hand the actual times I've seen babies wearing hand-knits of any description. It's the twilight zone of baby clothes.

Skipped up from OP but most knitted stuff isn't worn close to the skin anyway - make sure you put long sleeved bodysuits etc. under. I wouldn't like it, I can't bear itchy clothes and would worry baby was itchy but couldn't itch, but I would be very chuffed if my MIL took such an intrest :)

proseccogirl, I think you've had an unfair kicking here.
I'm a knitter with a knitting MIL whom I didn't hesitate in gently steering towards natural fibres when I was first expecting and I knew she wanted to get the needles out. I didn't emphasise the 'acrylic is naff/not best for babies/a fire risk' angle, just said how lovely her knitting was and how it deserved some nice yarn - I personally don't like how acrylic feels in my hands, and as knitting is a hobby/treat I'd rather have something that was pleasant to work with.
My feeling was - great, she wants to make something, that's lovely, it will be lovelier still for all concerned if it's something that we can actually use.
We actually had a nice day together, looking at patterns and picking out cotton/wool/bamboo yarns - we don't have that much in common so it was a good bonding experience. It felt more collaborative than me just getting her yarn i approved of - I would have been miffed by that in her place.

there are some incredibly nasty posts on here - almost all of them totally uncalled for. One example (of many) is spacehopper5's charming contribution to the discussion.
I love that its ok to totally lay into someone for being a bit posh/displaying posh tendencies, but totally unacceptable for posh people to lay into others for being common. What's the difference really? Its offensive either way.
If it was a WC mum who didn't want all the sloany boden baby stuff her MIL her bought her would anyone treat her like this? Something tells me not..............

Being a knitter myself I can tell you that the man-made yarns are very much cheaper than cotton/wool/fancy alpaca or whatever (like a 1/4 the price!). I suggest that you buy double-knit yarn yourself from somewhere like John Lewis (or online) and give that to your MIL. IME I'd rather have a jumper I can bung in the machine as hand-washing wool knits with a new baby is not my idea of a fun time.

Get her doing cable knit-this should slow the knitting down

YAB a little bit U, she enjoys knitting for the baby, has probably got a bit carried away, but a cardi or two in acrylic won't make any difference. You do realise the baby won't be in the same outfit for long because of sick/milk/poo/wee incidents, and as long as he/she has cotton next to the skin and not too many layers on, it will be fine. You will be able to tell if he/she is overheating.

Acrylic is SO much more practical for babies and children. It holds its shape better and stains will come out, as opposed to cotton or wool. If it feels a bit crunchy now, give it a wash with some fabric softener and a cool iron and it will feel much softer.

When I had my first child my stepmum knitted entire outfits for him, including knitted leggings! I assume the patterns came from the days pre-central heating. We just put him in them when we saw her and took some photos, and then, oh dear, they are far too small!

Sorry if someone has already said this - I think that it is also a generational thing as back when acrylic was invented it was a sort of wonder product (easy to wash). Which is ironic as it actually washes badly. I am totally against manmade fibres and I think it has nothing to do with being ungrateful or uncaring- you just want the best for your baby. I think you have tried the tactful method and if that doesn't work (or the fire hazard method!) and you can't be blunt- well what can you do?! Sorry this is turning out not to be a helpful solution but I do sympathise and I think that your original point seems to have been lost somewhere. What a waste of energy and time for all that beautiful knitting on garments that feel horrible, look horrible, are a waste of money (acrylic is literally plastic) and won't last.

Oh, life's too short, isnt it? Just bung on a flammable number when the i-l's are around and whip it off asap. For what its worth, I totally understand what you mean - man made fibres are pretty yuck and I avoid where poss for all the family. If that makes me a raging snob then so be it - I dont want to go around with my hair looking like a dandelion clock with all the static (it does happen to me, honest).