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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What happened to the 'AM I a Victim? thread?

117 replies

SixtyFootDoll · 04/08/2010 15:26

?

OP posts:
Tiredmumno1 · 04/08/2010 16:29

Well said mme

OrmRenewed · 04/08/2010 16:30

As I said on the thread before it died ! Why would anyone want to be The Victim?

GypsyMoth · 04/08/2010 16:31

we had to read it to get the story....kind of forced us,or there would be no understanding her thread

OrmRenewed · 04/08/2010 16:32

Well she did get some reasonable advice to start with. it was only when she got a bit hoity that people got hoity back I think.

proudnsad · 04/08/2010 16:34

Am I allowed to ask the blog address?

FluffyCut · 04/08/2010 16:36

ilovetiffany - i only read first 40 or so posts on that thread before it was pulled, i was refering to the cattiness on this thread.

and just because someone 'puts themselves out there' doesnt mean we have to be bitchy and nasty does it? So because someone is silly or immature or not 'quite right' (according to who's standards i wonder?) we have to point it out to them in a nasty way?? Really?

porcamiseria · 04/08/2010 16:36

bloody hell violet! easy tiger

I am glad it was pulled

and (this includes you chocolate swiss lady) PLEASE DONT SHARE BLOGS online it is just so dangerous and opens you to, well god knows what

ILovePlayingDarts · 04/08/2010 16:37

The original OP gave out enough information that if I was so inclined, would not have taken much to gather enough info for ID theft. Luckily, I'm not so inclined because I'm a very nice person really .

But her posts and her blog just screamed "naivety" and "insecurity" at me. And while she may be only 21, she's of the age and generation that's had a lot of "computer security" type of information thrown at them, and she should have been much more aware.

I also thought it odd that she nowhere mentioned checking for ID from these visitors, but that would tie in with the general lack of security awareness shown by the public information in her blog.

I have never felt the need to shout about all of the things going on in my life. Even my Facebook is restricted to friends only, and there aren't too many of them. The only reson I got Facebook is because my brother lives abroad and it's a good way of sharing stuff.

I'm hoping the OP learned a few things today, or at least is now thinking her blog over, that hopefully offsets all that naivety. And I don't mean this in any nasty sense, but it may take something serious such as ID theft to help her see sense.

pagwatch · 04/08/2010 16:38

Oh I have to agree with Orm. But anyone who cites hoityness....

I read the blog and just remembered with a wave of nostaligia my youthful, PFB, rose tinted days when I wanted everything to be perfect and, if it wasn't quite,I just pretended. I wanted to wrap her up and take care of her. Even her yearning for victimhood was faintly endearing. Some people do want to be victims then they can be all heroic and overcome shit. Very Oprah.

And the desire for the perfect life, perfect child. Well that tends not to make one too happy.I was all warm and fluffy.

Then she got all rude and aggressive and I lost interest.

Iloveclimbinghills · 04/08/2010 16:46

I felt very similar pag, she reminded me of me 10 years ago when I was telling myself that my life with my baby was perfect even though my marriage was on the rocks and I sobbed myself to sleep most nights. If I could have blogged I would have done so, another sphere to reinforce my shaky identity.

I hope she is OK.

MmeLindt · 04/08/2010 18:09

Porca
I still fail to see what hideous fate could befall me because of my blog. Aside from some nutter kidnapping my dog because she is so adorable. But then that could happen without a blog.

I do love your name, btw. Have I told you that before. I read it in the Annie Graves books and even now DH often uses it. Annie is just a blogger who wrote a book, before blogs were invented come to think of it.

Silver1 · 04/08/2010 18:11

What was it about???????

LucyLouLou · 04/08/2010 18:28

I think the lady in question was just wounded by unfair accusations. I didn't read her getting funny with people so I can't speak to this tbh, but I understand her being upset, I would've been too in her position. I've just this moment read the blog post that followed the one she linked us to and she really needs to take a deep breath and move on now. There's nothing she can do about it. I feel for her, but she's going to have to rise above it now I think.

Gigantaur · 04/08/2010 18:30

she was barking mad

tethersend · 04/08/2010 18:40

How did she get nasty? I read the thread before it got to that point I think...

LucyLouLou · 04/08/2010 18:42

She must've got mad after I stopped reading then....she was just upset before I left!

Gigantaur · 04/08/2010 18:43

oh i wasn't around for the entire thread but the bits i saw were ridiculous. she was a very very angry lady. she thought she was being picked on because many mners felt she gave a lot away in her blog and advised her to be a little more carefull with her information in future.
she was outraged at the suggestion.

pagwatch · 04/08/2010 18:54

she did get some 'why the hell are you posting so much info' comments but then responded with a 'I will blog what I like so you can all butt out you viperish types'

I am paraphrasing a bit

maduggar · 04/08/2010 19:51

Where can I find the blog?

LucyLouLou · 04/08/2010 19:57

Since she asked for the thread to be deleted, I'm not sure we should mention the name of it again....others might disagree with me, but that's where I fall on mentioning it....sorry

2blessed2bstressed · 04/08/2010 20:00

Saw the thread earlier, and had to follow the link to her blog to find out why she felt she was a victim...blog was soooo boring and badly written... but that's up to her I suppose.
Found the whole thing a bit "look at me, look, now!" but relatively harmless, although like others, I was frankly amazed that SS were out on a Sunday in response to one e-mail!

GypsyMoth · 04/08/2010 20:12

she was ok whilst everyone was agreeing with her...but then some didnt,me included,and she got defensive....she then got nasty and disappeared
also,someone mentioned her being a professional blogger,and the advertising on it making her money.....so
olivia from hq said it would be deleted because they didnt link to blogs

Spacehopper5 · 04/08/2010 20:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lucky1979 · 04/08/2010 20:27

They've wasted their time following up a malicious lie, but until they got to her house then how did they know it was a malicious lie and not a kid who really needs the intervention?

LookToWindward · 04/08/2010 20:57

She's young, bored, not terribly bright and with nothing to do with her time but to try and convince the world how happy she is with her lot. Utterly vacuous.

The idea that she's going to waltz down to her local nick to make a complaint is actually starting to, well not annoy but certainly niggle me.

Bottom line is, SS received a complaint which they have investigated, offered a few words of advice and then closed the incident - exactly as they should. Fair enough to be annoyed at the (alleged) malicious complaint but she's got absolutely no come back at all. It's a civil issue and the NSPCC will tell her to go away. She needs to put it behind her before she makes a bigger fool out of herself.

And her photography is no great shakes either.

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