to not want to send my PIL's a copy of my dc's reports?

[KathKa]

My PIL's keep asking me for copies of my dc's reports and it's really annoying me. My sil sent them copies of her dc's reports and they keep saying how amazing they are.

I am very pleased with my dc's reports but I feel as if I am being drawn into a competition that I want no part of. My PIL's are quite negative and I think they would concentrate on the areas to improve on that teachers have highlighted (like listening and less chatting!)rather than on the excellent academic results.

I keep making excuses assuming they will forget but they haven't!

AIBU?

Whoa !!!

Absolutely not - god grief.

I'd just say sorry but you're not having a copy, be up front and tell them that they are private?

just say no

we had this academic competitive shit in my family, and I have not forgotton it

and you are right to worry that they will compare given your feedback

YANBU

No, no, no ... stand firm now or you will have years and years of this. My ex-pil's were the same; they wanted to come to the first scan with us and then it caused a row when I wouldn't let them keep my favourite scan photo . It went on and on like that after ds was born and now I'm, quite glad I don't have anything to do with them anymore. I used to want to scream at them "Its my baby, not yours!!!"

Bad luck - glad I never had this problem. Making excuses clearly isn't working so the issue isn't going to go away without some sort of a statement. I think you should tell them straight that you're not going to give them a copy since (at your dcs school) they are intended for the parents only and you don't think it's in your childrens interest for them to be circulated to a wider audience.

On the bright side, at least they are showing some interest - even though it's way over the top and you have some misgivings as to why, it's possibly still better that the complete disinterest some gps show. Maybe you could also thank them for that? It might soften the blow a little.