To 'borrow' toilet roll from an old folks home

[Jasonthunderpants]

A few sundays ago we where getting low on toilet paper. We get the shopping delivered on a Weds aft. Normally I would use newspaper untill it arrived but I was hosting the coffee morning on Weds and didnt want newspaper in the loo (what would my coffee morning ladies think?)
I didnt want to buy some from Dick Turpins down the road as he is expensive.How expensive I hear you cry,well let me tell you. His packets of dried herbs are 50% more expensive than a shop 3 miles away 99p compared to 66p and I only needed a roll to tide me over untill Weds aft.
So I had a plan
On monday aft we go to the surestart group in the community center attached to old folks flats and I borrowed a roll from them,they normaly smell of wee anyway and wouldnt miss one roll.
Anyway IANBU just carefull with money
DW says I am tight but I dont like spending money unnecessary
Just because I used to take toilet paper from work before I met her, she thinks I am going back to my bad habbits

YABU and you have to replace it.

You tight-arsed bastard.

Don't you think you should be looking to maybe keep a few extra toilet rolls in the house just in case? We do.

You should have gone to the shop ,you tight sod

DW made me take it back the following week and we only used a few sheets
I think the toilet count was 3 poos and 5 wees worth
And with me being thrifty when I poo I only use one sheet,but I use both sides of it

yabvu

YABU and ageist and plain nasty to say 'they smell of wee anyway'

I wasnt going to spend money unnecessary when we where having cheaper paper delivered fron the supermarket
Its not tight it is carefull

I think we are supposed to laugh .....

I sometimes smell of wee. Its not ageist

They smell of wee because you stole their toilet roll, Jason.

Obviously you weren't being careful enough because you ran out in the first place.
You ran out because you were too tight to buy in enough to cover extra shittage.

Hilarious.

Jason, I fucking love you.

Your poor, poor wife

Tight if you have to pinch some I am afraid. Come on how much does loo roll cost? I would rather wipe my bum on nice soft loo roll than newspaper, very scratchy on the old ladybits, men would not know. I suggest you get some extra just in case, your poor wife!

I think you should have also nicked some incontinence pads and therefore you would also save on water for flushing.

I am carefull when flushing,we all know the poem

If its brown flush it down
If its yellow let it mellow

Thanks for making me smile for the first time in two days

Jason you need help

When I lived by myself and had no money. In the early 80's I used to borrow quite a few sheets from cafe's and other places! I'm horrified now but I really had no money and had to cycle 120 mile round trip bike ride to get to college because I couldn't afford the train. (borrowed loo paper from college as well!)

I love your threads Jason.

Keep it up.

YABU to use newspaper as loo roll. Not good for a lady parts.

YAN being careful with money, you are being beyond tight.

And you are unreasonable with maths.....

"His packets of dried herbs are 50% more expensive than a shop 3 miles away 99p compared to 66p"

I've always struggled with maths, but even I know that's not right!

Support your local business, don't steal from your local old folk. They will smell if everyone steals their loo roll!

I didn't know that rhyme but now I do I will remember it for ever!!