To think that you should not ask when the baby is due unless you are 100% sure that the woman is pregnant?

[poshsinglemum]

I am not pregnant. I do have a round post pregnancy tummy but by no means a huge tummy. I'm a healthy size 14, not fat but with lovely curves. My tummy has always been rounded but more so post dd.
Two customers in the past two months at work have asked me when the baby is due. Grrr. I refuse to feel fat.
I never ask unless a woman has an obvious bump and is quite definately up the duff. Both womem who asked me were fairly old and only one was mortified. Grrrr.
Mabe it's because sometimes I wear empire lines to disguise flab rounded tum.

@ moondog...
This only happens to me when I lose weight... If I'm skinny all over, I still don't lose my tum after having had 2 big babies. So the bump looks more pronounced iykwim.

Someone said this to me a few months after I'd gone back to work after my first maternity leave. I said loudly, 'no I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat, but thank you for noticing.' She was mortified.

Always helps to share the pain, I find.

I read a comment somewhere that said 'unless you can see a baby coming out, do not ask if a woman is pregnant'.

OP, YANBU, but i always feel bad for NOT asking, as i remember when i was pregnant the second time [after having such a utterly awful and worry ridden first pregnancy]
all i wanted to do was talk about being pregnant. i dont care about the fucking weather, IM MAKING A BABY! HOW COOL IS THAT? IM MAKING A TINY HUMAN!

also, empire lines make you look bigger, not smaller, surely! :S i have only ever tried on one empire line item that looked okay on me since ive been a 12/14, and i bought it in two colours, to savour the moment, thank god it was cheap.
i would recommend a loose vest top and a thin 'waterfall' cardie. naff, but distracts from the belly quite well.
[as mine is growing again...sigh]

MMT, I did that, too! Got a round of (tentative) applause on the Tube - and I took the offered seat

Slightly off-topic - I also spoke up when some git stuck his hand up my fanny on the tube - grabbed the wrist, as I couldn't tell who it belonged to, held it up high, and asked "WHOSE HAND IS THIS?"

That one got a standing ovation.

ItsGraceActually, I actually think I'm now in love with you.

ItsGraceActually, how awful!
you are a GOD though. i would have taken you for a drink.

Cheers! The answer, btw, was an ordinary-looking geezer in an expensive suit ... and a very red face.

When I was sz 14 I was overweight and I'm 5'4".

Back on topic I had a mc recently and was off work . No one knew the reason. But I am pretty sure some people think I'm pregnant. They keep looking at my belly. And others tell me I'm 'glowing'.

On a hen night and old school friend said, Oooh look at you, i stopped her and said, I had my baby 11 months ago...she was mortified and I was really pissed off. On seeing the photos of night out though, I did look pregnant. Why oh why did I wear that dress?

beegey i love the word eejit

This happened to me a while back, I was quite overweight then and we hadn't seen this relative in a while. However she said: "Can I ask you, are you expecting or did you just let yourself go?" I was and and joined the gym.

Two years ago we got back from holiday and our neighbour was due while we were away.
We see her over the fence and I notice the lack of bump, ensues a conversation.
Me: "Awww you've had the baby, how lovely etcetcetc"
Dh turns up: "Hello, ooh, you still haven't had the baby yet?"
neigbhour : "yes, I have"
dh: (genuinelly perplexed) "oh, but you're still big!!"
I was MORTIFIED, told him since he's not allowed to comment on anyone's belly/bump.
(which didn't stop him say to a 1 week overdue pregnant friend of mine "you look ready to burst!").not sure he'll ever learn.

I'm v careful about this having been on the receiving end of it a few years ago.

So I was mortified the other day when I was absolutely sure one of the mums at school was pregnant, asked when it was due and she said she wasn't pregnant.

Lesson to me: even if you are convinced woman is pregnant don't comment until she mentions it herself.

OP, YANBU. I agree with you, as do all of the posters on here.

Which is precisely why I don't understand all of the wailing and gnashing of teeth when pregnant women do not get offered a seat on the bus or tube. It is pretty much the same thing, no? Why are there two sets of rules?

My sister had a baby on Monday.

On Tuesday one of the cleaners walked into her room, looked at her holding brand new DD and asked "Who's baby have you got?" "Mine" said DSis. "But [confused}" said the cleaner pointing at her post pregnancy belly!!

Some people just do not get that the tummy doesn't disappear immediately - or ever in my case

I was asked this once at the church creche, I was bf the baby at the time. That particular person has no idea how depressed she made me. It still makes me want to cry and DD is 7 now!

I am 23 weeks but have been in the fat camp for a while
Anyway, someone I know DIDN"T know and didn't want to ask.

She asked a VERY clever "how are you feeling?" which made me start launching in to quick preg-related "fine thanks, not due until november just huge blabla" which confirmed it to her. Then she fessed up she wasn't sure and dind't like to ask!

If it's any consolation I was offered a seat on the underground PRE PG number 1

When I was heaving a massive bump about the woman in our corner shop didn't mention it until I said myself "when the baby comes" etc. Then she said she had been desperate to ask about it and say congratulations, but she didn't dare as she has once congratulated someone who was obviously very pg - and it turned out they weren't but had some kind of terrible cyst! The poor woman (and the woman she asked of course)

So now I too don't say anything until the other person mentions it. (Though I'm not above asking around to find out from someone else...)

moondog Thanks you've really made me laugh at the thought that fat women are blissfully unaware of their weight until someone is "helpful" enough to give them a wake up call, then they can start to sort themselves out.

I am pregnant

Someone asked me in the gym when I'm due. I was really tempted to play a mean trick and say "I'm not pregnant" but decided that would just be too mean.

I had this sort of backwards. When I was a out eight months pregnant one of the horrid old nurses at work said "finally you look pregnant, you were so fat before it was hard to tell". Obviously I burst into tears, she said "what's wrong? Must be hormones" the tears quickly turned to rage.

I doubt people do it to be mean

It's good that you are so happy and comfortable with your figure, but a size 14 in most cases is generally overweight. Not fat, but overweight.

LOL you need to do some sit ups sister!

i agree, only ask when its HUGE

i had the same when I went to mothercare to get fitted for maternity bra AFTER BABY WAS BORN by some skinny 17 year old

"when are you due"

I was offered a seat on the tube by a gorgeous, willowy, 65-year-old.

I am 31. I am not pregnant. I am not wearing that dress EVER again.