What does alcoholic liver disease look like please? I’m concerned.

[practicemakes]

A friend , despite all of our support and best efforts , is drinking upwards f a litre of vodka per day and has been doing this for over a decade. She has lost her marriage and children to this horrendous disease. She does not want to give up alcohol but I’ve noticed that the whites of her eyes are now a bright yellow, her skin has red angry rashes, she has lost a lot of weight and her limbs are skin and bone, like they’ve wasted away.
I know that she has been told from the doctors that her liver is not good but that was a few years ago.
im so worried and scared for her as the decline seems extreme
andnshe looks decades older than her fifty years.
what can I do ?

Yeah I mean, it could be longer or it could be less, its so hard to say but if someone already has yellow eyes and has no intention of stopping or accepting help, that would indicate severe alcoholic hepatitis and that is unpredictable and very medically serious. The liver is an incredible organ and can cope with a huge battering until one day it just cant.

You are right, it's incredibly sad. She urgently needs medical help at this point

I would make sure she is home and get her an ambulance - this would be my last resort. Obviously she has to engage with crew so it's risky and could waste precious resources, but she needs urgent help.

She has chosen to ignore all advice and won’t even answer the door anymore

She will die like I said.

Yes I’d do this. Do doctors still do home visits? Could that help? Where’s her husband? Family?

If it’s her by herself the police may go round? Maybe? Sorry didn’t read PP’s.

She got addicted to an addictive substance, happens to lots of us unfortunately.

Sadly there is nothing you can do unless she’s willing to help herself. Very sad

Her husband left with their children a few years ago following years of trying to support and some time spent in rehab. The children were traumatised and begging to leave by that stage. Her family and her friends have been shut out entirely. She refuses any intervention and says she needs the space.
The woman I am describing here is nothing like the woman I knew from childhood. I can never understand it.

Don't try to understand it, she's dying from alcohol related liver and brain disease, if she won't accept help, won't let anyone into her house then she will become very unwell and die alone, it can be very frightening and unpleasant. Are you in contact with her, do you have a key to her house, is there a keysafe set up, I'd perhaps do this .

This is absolutely the wrong thing to do.
Firstly it's not a 999 situation, even if she wanted help.
And secondly, she doesn't want help.
You can't force treatment on addicts.

Yes - as I said it's risky.

How is she getting the vodka, if she's becoming confused then a shop shouldn't be selling it to her, if its online shopping and being delivered she must be opening the door and paying online.

There is absolutely nothing you can do I’m
afraid. Losing her family hasn’t changed anything so nothing you could say will. I would probably prepare yourself for the worst, it sounds like you are really struggling with this (absolutely understandable) so I would recommend you maybe consider talking to someone yourself to try and process it.
I’m so sorry. With her symptoms and continuing drinking like she is it probably won’t be very much longer.

Problem is she is an adult with capacity. She has every right to refuse help and treatment, even though she desperately needs it. She knows she will die from this I suspect.

You’re describing the last six months of my DH’s life. I realised there was nothing more I could do to persuade him to stop and just had to step up and do the practical stuff, POA, getting his paperwork in order etc. Protect yourself, it’s a hideous situation. 💐

Sounds weird and a last resort but could you get into her house not via the front door?

She might have stockpiled it.

My friend died age 45 in a similar situation - in denial, refused any medical or social work help, eventually refused to even see her family.

Truthfully it is a very bad death. My friend suffered, alone and probably for days at home. The patient becomes disoriented and probably unable to gather their thoughts to seek help. The death is painful and messy.

As a young woman my friend had been vivacious, witty and very clever. She found alcohol age 17 and it slowly took over her life, and then ended her life.

Yes you are right that alcoholism is a cruel disease, and it’s hard to watch someone you care for decline this way.

Ability to find drink is the last faculty to go.

Is she still driving. Please tell me she has given that up . If not she needs reporting before she kills someone else.. You say she has already had driving accidents or did I misunderstand ?

I don’t think she is driving now. She doesn’t leave the house too much anymore .

I hope she's not driving, do you see her much, does she let you into her home.

No she pretends she’s not there and downplays everything

When did you last see her

Three weeks ago