The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring into Summer 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Lighter evenings, blossom and birdsong are with us once again. Pull up a chair, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

@Onewildandpreciouslife Thinking of you this week 🙏🏻.

I’ve just come back from a long dog walk in the sunshine. It’s a beautiful day after much needed rain yesterday. It’s done the garden so much good and flowers and weeds alike are growing like crazy so I will be spending a good few hours today pulling out nettles and fringed Willowherb!

Welcome to everyone new. I don’t post much here now but I do read this thread most days. The bit of the Claire Poole book often quoted here is so true. The first few days, weeks, months are the hardest but it does get so much easier to not even think about alcohol as time goes by. And sobriety is so very worth it. I’m over a year and a half sober now and life is better, easier, calmer and definitely healthier.

Hope everyone has a happy and peaceful Bank Holiday Monday.

Hi all
Very grateful for bank holidays today. I feel very calm.

Is it a "check how the treatment has gone" scan @Onewildandpreciouslife? Is there some nice things you can do for yourself this week or for afterwards that will take your mind off it? Or at least help you be okay with the feelings?

I have to say I do miss Instagram. I've been trying to find somewhere to buy a summer top and I follow quite a few independent uk clothing companies that have been impossible to find on google. I shall have to make a list somewhere so I know where to look. I still find myself picking up my phone a lot and looking for something to look at. Need to form some new habits all over again.

It’s a “is the treatment working and has the cancer spread anywhere else” scan. But I’m very lucky as I should get the results quite quickly. Been for a lovely long walk today so feeling good

Hello @CarrotSeeds - lovely to hear from you again! So pleased to hear that you are sober and reaping the rewards of it.

Hope the scan goes OK @Onewildandpreciouslife - will be thinking of you and really rooting for a good outcome.

Just about to take Sid out. Looks like it's going to wee down. We shall dash between the drops.

Strength and courage. xx

It’s been sunny today so I’ve been out and about gallivanting!
@Onewildandpreciouslife hope everything goes smoothly with your scan this week.
@WendyWagon oh I feel for you. House selling buying is hideously stressful. But I’m sure the right opportunity will come.
@CarrotSeeds lovely to see you here and glad you’re doing well.
Nothing exciting to report. Ive been watching re-runs of the real housewives of NY. If there was ever a motivation to maintain sobriety watching that show is it!

@Onewildandpreciouslife hope the scan has a good outcome.

Happy bank holiday all.
Been out visiting family today which has been lovely. Feeling tired and a bit depleted eill am.get to bed at a decent time.

Everything is crossed for you @Onewildandpreciouslife
Welcome to newcomers!
Will catch up properly on the thread on Thurs/Fri this mad time at work ends for now, but I’m still going strong, happy AF (my niece told me that it has too meanings - I’m both!!)

Hope it all goes well, @Onewildandpreciouslife🤞🍀. x

I have a liver scan on Thursday, and am hoping there will be no fluid this time. I've spent the weekend with my daughter, her partner and the dog, which was lovely. Dog is getting old though. I don't see him regularly, so I notice when things change. I love him to pieces though, and will be very sad when the inevitable comes to pass.

Evening all.

I'm on Mumsnet through the Facebook. I couldn't load the page.
We've just been naughty and had burgers (not the handmade kind!).

I had a friend call ( I thought she was coming tomorrow). We had a good chat and she's living with her mil who has dementia so I suspect a breather at mine.

I did find a fabulous abode yesterday @REP22 so I think you're physic! Hopefully a viewing but it is with the totally fruitcake agent. He once told another agent my husband and I ran an illegal business. We'd be retired by now if we did!

Good morning
Hope it's a good start to the week for those of us lucky enough to have the bank holiday off. I did a little meditation session using the headspace app this morning. Trying to quieten my brain a little. I think it might have worked but need to get a streak going to feel the benefits properly.

Good luck for your scan @ShyMaryEllen. Will they actually give you the results of this one or is it one of those where they'll only tell you if there is a problem? Hope you get some answers.
Thinking of you @Onewildandpreciouslife. The walks really are something at the moment aren't they. I saw some hares the other morning! Not as warm today but still bright.

Much depends on the radiographer. Some are chatty and pleasant, and others grim-faced and secretive. I don't expect them to diagnose anything, but it's reassuring to be told if there have been no changes since the last one. My last one was worrying though, so who knows?

I usually get a letter weeks later saying something vague. Even last time, when they found fluid round the liver I wasn't called in or spoken to - it was just a letter with the findings. If I didn't know the implications I'd be no wiser.

Afternoon all.
I've got a viewing on Friday at the cottage ( old stables I think). Very keen.

Nothing to report on the drinks front. I'm chilling a pre mixed can of G and T.

Can I please join.

I have NC for this but only because I’m
a little embarrassed about my earlier attempts at reducing my alcohol intake.

I have reached a point that I know I need to do something and I can’t just drink moderately. I have tried and failed.

I came back from an All inc holiday with DH 12 days ago and I reflected on just how much I drank. It’s a lot more than I ever planned. I started off ok but by day 6 (of 9) I was starting before mid day. (Was self serve open pool bar with good quality spirits, cava , beer etc) and we also had a mini bar in room that was replenished with Prosecco , beer and red wine (and soft drinks too) . I was very active in mornings with 3 mile walks and 45 minute swims in ocean so it was a treat to have a drink or two - more like double/triple vodka and coke after my activities. DH didn’t know there was alcohol in it (if he did, he never said) I would have water with lunch but then back to the pool and self serve bar.

DH doesn’t drink at all and he has no clue about my level of drinking. I tend to drink just enough to still keep my wits about me. Last day of holiday though we were out all morning and I didn’t have my usual fix, we then sat around pool area waiting for room to be cleaned. DH was planning an afternoon in room so I was planning my drinks alone . As soon as he left I had two massive Aperol sprits (as I made them myself it was 2/3 cava, 1/3 aperol ) back to back, then a rum and Diet Coke, more cava, a one more rum and coke and by the time I was done at the pool area I went for a coffee and don’t even remember walking back to the room. I felt awful, sick and lost all appetite. Ruined our last day on holiday. I don’t even remember walking down to the restaurant which is awful. I felt such shame. As I hide things from DH I kept apologising and making an excuse that my one drink must have been really strong. He’s completely clueless when it comes to alcohol and believes me. I feel like a fraud and hate that I’ve been lying. Drinking alone is so shameful.

I bought a big bottle my favourite liqueur at DF before flight home. It’s 31% abv and sweetly delicious so first few days home it was half gone along with a half bottle vodka I had in freezer. On Saturday that just gone I bought another litre of passion fruit mango vodka and I had 2-3 shots in Fanta few times yesterday. Woke up at 2 am drenched in sweat, shaky and could not sleep. I came to the realisation that this is it. I can’t keep doing this. I’m heading down a scary path. This is by far the worst my drinking has ever been.

As soon as DH left for work this morning I went downstairs and dumped the vodka and remaining liqueur . I have two bottles of wine left, Malibu which I hate (belongs to dd who is at uni) and some cider in fridge but I might gift those? Maybe I’ll still dump but those don’t tempt me as much. It’s the spirits….

I’m 46 and just want to enjoy my life. I am envious of my DH when he sleeps and I’m
awake after drinking - this is happening more regularly now. I am relatively healthy in every other way though but weight is creeping up from the drinks and inevitable snacking. I love to swim, walk and do Apple fitness workouts at home. I can’t believe how much control alcohol has over me.

I am listening to some podcasts about sobriety and have some books that have been recommended that I’ve been putting off as I didn’t want to stop drinking all together. I will go back and read over posts here too.

I just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks f you for this far, thank you for reading. I’m going to have to come clean to DH and I’m worried he will be disappointed and worried about me. I know he will support me but he will be shocked and I probably won’t be telling him everything . I’ve been hiding and drinking alone most of the time 😔

I hope my post wasn’t too detailed or triggering…

Huge well done for taking this step. I have been where you are in some ways. It was a holiday of excess where I decided to stop. One great advantage - your DH doesn’t drink and that is amazing if you want to stop (at least for now).

I stopped just over 70 days ago and no regrets. I have been drinking for around 30 years since I was a teenager and we are a similar age. Things start to feel not so good anymore at this age. It all catches up and I want to go into the next 30 years feeling as good as I can. The quit lit has been life changing for me. I am re-listening to Clare pooleys book. I love it. There are so many good ones. It’s been easier than I thought in some ways and hard in others. Apparently post three months it gets a bit easier and post 6 months even better. But the time is truly flying and despite loads of bad stuff happening in my life atm I know that I am handling better now than if I was drinking. I dread to think what would happen if I was.

stay in touch here it’s so supportive and no judgement whatever happens x

Hope scan goes well

Quick check in

The no booze going well but I am really looking forward to feeling a little less grumpy and more pink clouds. I was reading that days 45-120 approx can be a bit tricky for some while everything is recalibrating and that is certainly true for me. Add a nice dose of fluctuating hormones in peri, an unemployed grumpy husband and a testing young child and it adds up to one grumpy lady!

I know I would be a lot worse if I added drink in the mix here. I am just hoping for the day when calm and happy is my norm again. Please tell me it’s coming! I used to be such a positive and optimistic person and I just feel so grumpy atm. I keep focusing on all that has and could go wrong and can’t seem to get myself out of this loop.

Thank you @Sunshinebound99 and well done on 70 + days. I plan to post here to keep accountable and to be inspired. I know I’m very lucky that DH doesn’t drink , even my DD who is 19 rarely drinks and I don’t really have a social life. Very introverted and love being at home (hence mainly drinking at home which has proven very problematic!)

@Sunshinebound99 I feel you on the peri hormones, I’m at the beginning stages of peri- not ready for HRT yet but hard to come to terms I may have this for like 10 years. Periods and menopause runs really late in the females in my family 🙄

Thank you! Sounds like a very good plan. Great about your husband and daughter. I’m pretty introverted as well which was dangerous for my drinking habit. I have been forcing myself to catch up with people and do more and I’ve actually had a good time (when I can get out of my grump - don’t let my post above uninspire you! My family and I have just had a lot of bad luck all at once recently, so I think that’s the main reason)

Similar and it’s such a pain. Oh the joys! I have heard though that it’s easier to manage without booze and slowly I’m finding that. But still very early days for me

@TickleMeElmo1 welcome. I’m new here too, and on day 10 of no alcohol. Posting here has really helped. I can understand a lot of what you said- I too am very introverted and drink (drank?) alone. Also spent a lot of time planning my drinks, and panicking if it didn’t work out. Many events where I can’t remember getting home, even mid-afternoon family affairs. And also hiding it from my husband. When we were newly married he got excited that I was pregnant, because of my constant ‘tummy upset’. When of course it was the booze I had hidden in the cupboard.

I’m sure a lot more wisened posters will have some great advice for you very soon. I’ve found alcohol free prosecco in particular has really helped when the craving has been hard to ignore, like on a sunny Sunday afternoon. The Freixenet one is good.

I have a hangover, the first in a very long time and it is the worst feeling in the world. I feel like I have let you all down but I need to admit it to you shipmates. I’m at a work event that I’ve been planning for months, everything went really well yesterday and I did not say no/order AF when everyone went back to the bar after the meeting. I had 11.6 units, half the amount I was drinking per day up until 29/12/25 (without hangovers!!) but I’ve had very little sleep, think I might vomit & want to cry. But I need to shower, pack my case, check out of my room & meet my colleagues for breakfast, we then have training until 5pm & I have a 10pm flight home. Today is going to be horrible. I’m sorry. Last night was the final alcoholic drink of my life, it was cognac, I don’t even like cognac but our ‘big boss’ ordered one for everyone to celebrate me & what I’ve recently achieved. I feel like such a failure.

Oh @TwoNicePuppies - a mistake does not make you a failure. You've recognised it as a mistake and you've already put it behind you. It is so hard at these work things when there's a big boss wanting to show generosity and motivate people by buying the drinks, and everyone around you seems to be having a great time, and the atmosphere is 'we've worked hard, we deserve this'. It is really difficult when you feel like the party-pooper by saying no. You were caught off guard but it's a learning experience, next time you can be better prepared.

@WendyWagon So sorry to hear about the Colefax house. All you can do is file it under 'not meant to be' and wait for the right one to come along. It's gutting, though, you think 'should I have offered xxx, should I have said this' etc. especially if you feel the estate agents might have had their own agenda.

A quiet Bank Holiday for me. A moment of temptation came out of the blue, we were having a pub lunch on Monday and I was glancing round to see where the loos were, and I saw a pint of Guinness on a table - a full pint, perfect head - and I couldn't stop playing out in my mind what it would be like to drink it. I used to really like that ice-cold Guinness in summer and, what was worse was that it was a bit of a 'trademark' for me, 'Phantom and her pint of Guinness' - I liked it because it wasn't a traditionally feminine drink whereas I am quite traditionally feminine in my dress, wear make-up etc. It sounds really pathetic when I write it down!

I didn't order one, thankfully, but it's disconcerting how moments of temptation can come from nowhere - this was lunchtime, not a trigger time for me normally, I was rarely (of course, not never) a daytime drinker.

I have a meal out coming up soon for DH's birthday, so that's one I am preparing myself for mentally. We are thinking Italian so the red wine will be calling me as soon as get the first waft of garlic.

Morning all.
Welcome aboard @TickleMeElmo1 - I’m glad you’ve made the decision to join us. How was your first night without alcohol? Annoyingly, sleep will probably be rubbish in the first few days because your body isn’t used to getting to sleep without alcohol- it will get better, I promise! Just take it one day at a time.

@TwoNicePuppies - you haven’t let anyone down and you’re not a failure. You’ve had a blip- it does not define you. Drink plenty of water, and just grit your teeth to get through today. It will be all right x