Calling time on wine: 100 days sober - starting 01/01/26

[reset100]

My wine drinking has slowly spiralled into a daily habit and I’m calling time on it. No drama, no rock bottom - just the realisation that it’s become a crutch and I want out of the swirl.

From 1st January, I’m committing to 100 days sober and I’d love others to join me. This isn’t about moderation or “just weekends” - it’s about a clean break and supporting each other to go completely alcohol-free for the full 100 days.

If alcohol has crept in as a daily default, if you’re tired of negotiating with yourself every evening, or if you simply want a proper reset with people who get it, you’re very welcome here.

No judgement. No pressure. Just accountability, honesty, and support.

Welcome @Els1e
Well done for hanging on when your friends have thrown in the towel.

I had 8.5 hours of sleep last night which is a huge amount for me but I'm still not waking up feeling fresh and energised. I have a lingering cold so it's probably that but it's so frustrating!

DP offered me a glass of red last night. I declined and it wasn't actually difficult, I didn't fancy it at all despite it being a Friday.

I've never completed dry Jan before, the only time I've been dry for a month or more is during pregnancy, so I'm quite excited to be able to say I've completed it and I really think I will this time!

I feel this is what we need at this stage of out “ journey”

LET'S BE HONEST.

If you need a drink to relax, you’re not relaxed.
You’re sedated.

🍺

If you need alcohol to be fun, confident, interesting, and connected.

You don’t have a social life.
You have a coping mechanism.

🧠

That’s not a moral judgement.
It’s a diagnosis of the culture.

Nearly everyone is using something to tolerate themselves.

You stopping doesn’t make you boring.

It makes you a problem.

⚠️

Because when you stop drinking, you don’t just quit a habit.

You expose the deal everyone else has agreed to.

A system where personalities are rented.
Where bravery is borrowed.
Where joy is outsourced.

🎭

Alcohol wasn’t your problem.

It was your substitute.

For confidence.
For imagination.
For permission.

So when it leaves, there’s a silence.

Not craving.
Identity.

And most people can’t sit in that long enough to hear what’s underneath.

🔥

Good.

That discomfort is the rebuild.

---

Here’s what actually changes when you stay sober long enough for it to matter:

👇

• 🧠 Your humour sharpens. Less noise, more timing.
• ⚡ Your energy evens out. No chemical peaks, no crashes.
• 🚫 Your tolerance for bullshit collapses.
• 🎨 Your imagination comes back online.
• 🪞 Your confidence stops disappearing the next morning.

No hype.
No transformation porn.

Just reality returning.

🧱

This isn’t willpower.

Willpower clenches.
Character restructures.

Independence isn’t quitting alcohol.

It’s not needing to be altered to feel acceptable.

That’s the shift most people never make.

Not “I don’t drink”.

But:

“I don’t need a substance to access myself.”

🧭

Before you get the upside, you walk through:

• 😐 Boredom
• 😬 Awkwardness
• 🥶 Social friction
• 🔕 Silence

Then:

• 🧘 Presence
• 🧠 Self-trust
• 🧲 Respect that sticks

---

FAQ. Because your brain will try to negotiate.

❓ “Isn’t life dull without drinking?”
Only if your personality depended on sedation.

❓ “Don’t you miss it?”
I miss the fantasy. I don’t miss the cost.

❓ “Is this forever?”
It’s long enough to meet the version of you that doesn’t need permission.

---

This is the reward no one markets.

Not dopamine.
Depth.

🪓

If this pissed you off, good.
It usually means something cracked.

I work with people rebuilding this identity properly.
No slogans. No pretending it’s easy.

📅

Book when you’re ready.
Not when everything’s on fire.

That difference decides who actually changes.

@SwiftyFifty 👏👏👏

That was just what I needed to read. I have another social situation today and would love to drink. However, I have my second fasting day on the 5:2 diet tomorrow. Clearly there is no way on earth I’d be able to fast with a terrible hangover. Sticking to my diet is what’s keeping me going today.

I was about to say the same. I went down with the lurgy on NYE (maybe the universe trying to tell me something 🤔) but the bloody thing has knocked me off my feet and just won’t go, and I do wonder to what extent it’s being prolonged by the effects of drinking detox. I’ve become totally exhausted, running on empty, and I think it may be the sheer strain my immune system is under, trying to fight on too many fronts.

Just trying to feed myself good things and rest as much as possible in hopes of turning a corner soon - I’m with @freshstart2026 in that the start of my week 3 will be next Thursday, so if the Ian C timeline is correct, that’s something positive to aim for.

Wishing everyone a happy, sober, healing weekend x

@needastrongoneagain thinking of you. That is so tough. Be kind to yourself. Well done on not drinking.

@reset100get well soon.

Is anyone else struggling to find “joy”? Previously my joyful moments and the times I looked forward to almost all revolved around alcohol - going to the pub, out for a meal, drinking with friends. Now that drinking is no longer an option I’m feeling rather flat. I do get some joy out of my sober early morning coffee and a nice evening bath, but I need to find more things that spark joy to replace the alcohol.

@freshstart2026 previously I had this. Last year I did twelve days and each one felt like punishment. I’m focusing on healing my body- a new take for me and it seems to be working better than other years.
in terms of joy, yes and no, I’m still revelling in waking up feeling good ( physically and mentally) and I am planning stuff each day of the weekend to keep busy. Today a musical ( I hate the theatre ) tomorrow cinema. If I was drinking I would do none of this. Saying that, whenever there comes another time where I’m going to the pub, I’m not sure how i ll feel.
when I think a night getting absolutely pissed ( at home alone) and chain smoking, sending “ hilarious” memes to people constituted a night out in my book, I feel very cringe!!

I’m so inspired by reading everyone’s posts. Day 10 for me. It’s so weird but I too don’t feel the desire to drink …I’d got to the point where I hated the hold alcohol had over me but just couldn’t break away. Previously when I’ve tried to abstain I’ve told everyone ‘I’ve stopped’ but this time I’m just quietly taking a day at a time which is a much better psychological tactic I hope. Just calculating what I haven’t spent - 10 days, a bottle of wine on Tues, weds, Thurs and Sundays - abstained most Mondays as it was always a new start after doing something shameful at weekend because of alcohol (£6 job from the local Tesco on way home from work) = £30. Friday and Saturday blow outs - 2 bottles a night of the same cheap crap = £48. Probably 4 packs of cigarettes (always want a fag with a drink = £76. That’s £154 in 10 days 😳. Unbelievable 🙈. I’ve found my crew and I’m so thankful to you all. I’m so sorry for all the crap life is throwing some of you at the moment- you are amazing to get through and keep your resolve, bless you xx

@1Flew0ver now put that £150 into a separate account and do the same in another 10 days and book yourself a trip with that money as your reward .

Thank you so much for the kind words again, you are all so kind.

@freshstart2026 On the They Think it’s all Sober podcast, they came up with a great idea. A gratitude list. Sounds a bit cheesy but these two guys actually message each other one thing every day. The idea is they do it not just when life is amazing, but when they really have to dredge something out to be grateful for each day. Now, I haven’t gone as far as messaging a mate, or even telling anyone, but I have started my list. I write it down so I can refer to it after a few months. Today I was up early with the Spaniel and it was still and frosty - a perfect winters day. He’s 12, but he still bounds about like a puppy, particularly in weather like this. It was quiet and very calming, I was glad to be outside to see the sun come up. So, nothing special really in the great scheme of things - but a small moment of joy, and I think they will add up. X

@needastrongoneagain thats a great idea, thank you. Some days I just feel grateful to have a warm house and a roof over my head! Would that count? x

@1Flew0ver I’ve also saved about £150 by not drinking a bottle a night, going to the pub or buying takeaways after drinking to soak up the alcohol. Incredible really.

@freshstart2026 I reckon if we all perhaps valued the smaller things like a warm house and a roof over our head just a little bit more then the world might feel a more contented place 😊

I just spent my weekly booze saving on a pair of wide leg jeans from Sezane for the spring. Whoops!

That may be the first time I've seen the words "spaniel" and "calming" in close proximity, @needastrongoneagain ! But I do know what you mean - we had a springer and it was very hard not to feel your spirits lift, however bleak you were feeling, at her sheer excitement about going for a walk, and the way she would boing around rushing back to tell you what fun it was (before running off to pursue her lifetime ambition to catch a deer, for the bazillionth time).

Day 10. Ten more of these and we'll be at Day 100.

Hi all, can I join? Doing Dry Jan and then fot some teat results back for something unrelated, but liver was slightly elevated and it has properly shocked me. I was struggling with a month off wine but this has mega jolted me into reality and I'm now committed to going sober full term. At least 100 days but hopefully far beyond. Im doing ok so far now that the first week is done and starting to rediscover who I am without anaesthetising my personality three to four nights a week. No one really talks about what an addictive poison alcohol is, and how easy wine is to drink, but we are literally harming ourselves when we drink it! So that's me and that's why Im done with it! I gave up smoking almost 15 years ago, I can do this!

I find it in running / exercising. If I try and stop drinking or drink less without the benefit of being able to exercise properly it doesn’t work. For me, exercise is the upside to not drinking. Can you put some effort / time into a hobby or pursuit you enjoy? Something you can focus on and look forward to instead of drinking?

I’m focussing on the joy of the good sleep, zero hangover, clearer mind and skin currently. I do know what you mean I loved that feeling of wine unwind…friends over and just getting stuck in. I’m focussing on the joy I’ll get from 100 days sober.

Hmmm today was tougher than expected, first time I have felt a sense of missing out and wanting some wine! Passed fairly quickly though.

Managed to get 4 enormous beef bones from the butcher (£2!) to make beef bone broth with. Been bubbling away since lunchtime but ideally needs 24 hours so need to figure out a plan as although the batch in the slow cooker will be fine to leave I daren’t leave a pan on the hob overnight!

Finally dragged my ass onto my exercise bike and did 30 mins. Getting into a consistent exercise routine is def my next step.

Found some of my Korean collagen masks earlier so might pop one on while we watch a film tonight.

Bone broth is meant to be great. I’m noticing the habit that is drinking rather than the need. Went to the theatre and at the break went to the bar. My friend had a Prosecco and I would have automatically got one then got the taste and popped to shop on way home for a bottle which I would now be halfway through. Instead I got a raspberry lemonade which was delicious, hit the spot and was a third of the price!
Hunger is definitely something I need to avoid too as that’s when I drink wine like bloody water.
well done everyone we can get through another weekend.

DRY JANUARY: THE BRUTAL TRUTH

This is the part no one fucking tells you.
Not the glow-up.
Not the sunrise journaling bollocks.
The first 10 days of Dry January.
The real version.
Read slowly.

First things first
Nothing is wrong with you.
You’re not weak.
You’re not “failing sobriety.”
You’re not secretly broken because you’re bored, irritated, flat, restless, or wondering why everyone on Instagram looks reborn while you feel like an unplugged toaster.
This is a predictable response when you stop long-term drinking.
Especially functional drinking.
Especially midlife drinking.
Especially when alcohol wasn’t chaos — it was routine.
I drank for decades. Pub culture. Wine at home. Weekend rhythm. Army years. High-functioning. No rock bottom theatrics.
When I stopped, this phase surprised the hell out of me.
So here’s the unsanitised truth.

The First 10 Days of Dry January (No Influencer Edition)
Day 1–2:
You feel weirdly proud.
Also slightly smug.
Also annoyed that nobody has thrown a parade.
Sleep is shit. Brain is loud. You think, “Is this it?”

Day 3:
Your nervous system clocks the absence.
It’s not craving alcohol.
It’s missing the off switch.
You start pacing like a zoo animal.

Day 4:
Irritability arrives uninvited.
Everything feels mildly hostile.
The dishwasher breathes wrong.
You Google “why am I angry after quitting drinking.”

Day 5:
Flatness.
Not sad. Not happy.
Just… beige.
This is where people panic and assume sobriety is a scam.

Day 6:
Boredom with teeth.
You don’t know what to do with evenings because alcohol used to structure time.
You weren’t relaxing.
You were ending the day.

Day 7:
Sleep starts glitching. Dreams get vivid.
Your brain is recalibrating without chemical sedation.
This isn’t healing.
It’s maintenance.

Day 8–9:
Mood swings without a plot.
Moments of clarity followed by “why am I doing this?”
This is the nervous system adjusting, not a personality flaw.

Day 10:
You realise something uncomfortable:
Alcohol didn’t just numb pain.
It filled space.

FAQs People Are Too Polite to Answer Honestly

“Why don’t I feel amazing yet?”
Because dopamine doesn’t give a fuck about your calendar.

“Is this what life after alcohol is like?”
No. This is life without the shortcut while the system rewires.

“Why am I bored after quitting drinking?”
Because boredom is what shows up when constant stimulation stops.
It’s not emptiness.
It’s unused capacity.

“Shouldn’t I be happier?”
Not yet. Stability comes before enjoyment. Always.

“Everyone else looks better than me.”
They’re posting highlights. You’re experiencing biology.

Here’s the part that matters
When something has been part of your routine for decades, removing it doesn’t create peace.
It creates silence.
And silence feels wrong at first.
You didn’t lose alcohol.
You lost a regulator.
A time-marker.
A socially-approved sedative.
So your nervous system does what it’s supposed to do:
It protests.
That protest is not a sign to go back.
It’s a sign the system is updating.

Reframe this properly
This isn’t a void.
It’s space without instructions.
You’re not standing in loss.
You’re standing without anaesthetic.
The noise stopped.
That’s why you hear yourself now.

One rule. Nothing else:
Routine before meaning.
Not joy.
Not purpose.
Structure.

If this hit, tell me:
Which day has been the hardest so far?

Thanks @SwiftyFiftyi needed that. Feeling bored and twitchy tonight 🫣

Me too @katinthehattt

Thanks @SwiftyFifty

Im going to have a 2nd ginger beer to hopefully stave the craving. Watching a crime drama and a woman grabbed a bottle of wine from the fridge and necked a quarter of it back, I felt myself salivate. WTH….