A cry for help

[newme2025]

I have drunk a bottle of wine (sometimes more) most nights for years. I successfully completed Dry January 2025 with the help and support of this forum. In February I started drinking three or four days a week (did 14 days sober) and now in March, I’m drinking four days a week and am drinking at least a bottle again on those nights.

I’m so ashamed of myself, especially because I know I’m setting a terrible example to the DC, who often see me with a glass of wine in my hand. DH and I sometimes have rows when we’ve been drinking and I know this hugely upsets the kids if they overhear.

I desperately need to stop drinking but have dreadful social anxiety - I’ve had it since I was at primary school and have tried therapy and medication. The latter did help somewhat. I also use alcohol to drown out feelings of self-loathing and general anxiety over life and the future.

This morning I’ve woken feeling absolutely awful from drinking heavily yesterday. I drank so much that I have no memory of getting home. I was hoping after Dry January that I could moderate, but am clearly unable to. I’ve got to the point where I absolutely need to stop, but I’m scared to make the leap to full time sobriety and what it will mean for my friendships. I also worry I’ll have no way of escaping anxious thoughts or unwinding after a hard day at work. Please help.

I could have written your post. I drank a bottle of wine a night. Felt like I deserved it, everyone was doing it etc. but I slept so badly and had awful anxiety.
i ended up telling a doctor who told me to go to AA. I was terrified but went that evening and it was brilliant. Helpful supportive and what I needed to reassess my life.

It’s very easy to get used to drinking a bottle of wine a few nights a week. I’ve done exactly that at various times in my life, often for stretches of several months, with efforts to cut back lasting a few months before getting back into the almost daily wine habit. I do occasionally drink socially now but I’m very careful as I know that I am only a supermarket aisle away from getting back to where I was. Not drinking at all has become much easier than trying to limit my consumption.