Dry January and beyond

[BulldogMumma]

I couldn't find a dry January thread so thought I'd make one.
I've posted on the alcohol threads before but never see it through. This year I'm determined to do dry January and even beyond.
My drinking has really crept up lately and I know I need to address it. I lost my mum this year due to alcohol and I don't want to go the same way. I've been using alcohol as a crutch since losing my mum but now's the time I stop relying on the wine and take back control.
Anyone else who wants to join me are more than welcome, would be good to have some buddies along the way x

Being honest in this situation I would just drive even a short distance just go avoid the temptation. I agree it's good to learn strategies but one of this is driving places in my view.

Is there any clubs you can join that focus on other things? Churches often run free events and activities like this. Any groups that do things like coffee meet ups or set activities? Do you think any of your friends are feeling similar?

My friends aren’t the issue, I am! I would happily tell them about dry January but at this event someone - a friend, an acquaintance, a waiter - will say “would you like any wine” and that’s the moment I have to say “no thank you” and not “yes please”. That’s my challenge!

💯 agree with you @BulldogMumma i know it’s coming from their insecurities around how much they drink, all the same I just hate the judging I don’t judge anyone so would be great to just be accepted and not have to answer questions or explain all the time why I’m not drinking it makes me not want to socialise. And yes I think you’re right @Fundays12 that’s a good idea I normally go to the gym early mornings just over coming the jet lag but think I can manage tomorrow the sun is out may even get some fresh air and listen to a podcast I love the sober awkward ones! Always make me laugh Victoria has some funny stories from her party days

@Comeonicandoit I have to practice as bad as it sounds! I look at the menu in advance and decide on a drink - alcohol free or fancy mocktail and talk myself into looking forward to it. I know it sounds dramatic but it helps me stay focus. Ordering a coke in the moment won't work 😂

I've just been to the supermarket and walked straight past the wine 👏👏
Currently drinking a sparkly water I seem to be thirsty a lot, probably because I've dehydrated my body with wine for god knows how long

I find once I make the decision to abstain for a few weeks, I'm not tempted. It's having AF days during a normal drinking week that I find difficult. One thing that helps though is if I chew some gum - after that I don't want to drink as it would taste awful.

On the judgemental friends, I've come to the conclusion that people are just generally more judgemental these days. Most of my friends are now either TT or rarely drink, and I definitely feel them judging me when say I like to drink wine most evenings at home on my own (even if only a glass) - they'll say something to the effect that they wouldn't do that for 'health reasons' and quickly change the subject. I don't bother to tell them I'm doing DJ as they just say that a month is nothing and they haven't drunk for X number of weeks!! I can't win basically 🤐😉.

@Comeonicandoit ,lots of people recommend "playing it forward", so, thinking of the consequences of drinking - sick, headache, anxiety, remorse, shame, disappointing self and family, regret etc- there are usually lots to choose from!
versus health, money, self delight, faith in judgement, able to stick to a decision, resilience to manage the next social event etc.
Might this help?

Just dropping by. I’ve been a MN DJ Penguin for years (any other old timers on here?). We used to joke about the penguin huddle. Sometimes you are on the outside but sometimes you just need the support of the middle!

day 2. Last year I managed 21 days and fell off due to a work stress. This year I’m trying again, but I’ve really used it as a crutch in the last quarter of 2024 and I can see my reliance on it is more, so I already think this will be hard. My tolerance has also changed and I have to drink more to get where ‘I want to be’ - which for me is less head noise, less overthinking, and knock-out drops for sleep as my mind seems especially lively when the lights go off sober 🙄

I’ve been there, done that. Meditation. Hobbies. Gritty lengthy box sets. Walking. 0% treaty drinks (bleugh - just pointless to me - sorry!). Over the years I’ve tried it all and it’s just a case of gritting my teeth and getting it done which is a bloody waste of time but it needs to be so.

I’m twitching tonight already so I’m counting through the hours one at a time. If I can get to 8pm it’s done, as I wouldn’t normally bother after that. It’s cooking and eating which are my triggers. 4pm id already be ‘looking forward’. 5 I would be opening a bottle. One glass cooking. One with dinner. One clearing away - and look - a whole bottle gone!

Not good.

30 mins until I finish work. Off tomorrow. Would usually relax with a glass of wine. Tonight I'm going to take the dog for a walk to get my steps up then have a bath & paint my nails.
Decided to reward myself with a pamper rather than alcohol. Think I might watch the new Harlen Coben too

I'm joining too if I may. I am seriously considering give up alcohol altogether. I always drink too much, make a right tit of myself and forgetting hrs.
Am going to stop drinking at home unless special occasions but 1st DJ.

I'm keeping a journal for now, track of sleep how I feel etc..

I'm planning my days more now to avoid triggers. Nice bath, face mask, hand& feet ones etc. Plus have some nice non alcohol alternatives and finish the night with a sleepy tea which am now on day 4 seem to work so far.

Going away next weekend and DH just asked if I like a bottle of champagne then. Dickhead.

Hi everyone, I’d like to join if that’s ok. I’m going to try and do dry Jan, I’ve done 1 day so far and it was hard!! I’m 36, I drink every night 1-2 large glasses of wine, I finish a bottle every 2-3 days. I know it could be a lot worse but it’s become such a habit and what I look forward to in the evening. I’m hoping cutting out the wine for a month will help me to lose some weight too. But I don’t know what I’ll do in the evenings now!

Day 2 here. I did not have a good night's sleep. Not sure if that was a lack of alcohol or just one of those nights. Took christmas decs down and big house clear up, so I've been busy. Found 3/4 bottle of wine in the fridge left over from New Year. I poured it down the sink rather keep it in the house.

I froze the last of the open wine into ice cubes for cooking so that puts it out of harms way for now.
Looking at non alcoholic drinks last night I came across a few of the Mother Root/switchel type drinks. The PRICE! Do not pay for this stuff. I made my own today and it couldn't be easier,plus you can adjust to suit your own taste. This batch is ok but needs less honey and more apple cider vinegar next time for my taste.

Welcome to the new joiners!
@missgraciea before I started DJ I was drinking a whole bottle a night. I'm 42 so really need to rein it in.
I'm also doing the pampering on an evening, I've got a foot and face mask for tonight.
I'm actually tired tonight so after tea it'll be shower, foot and face mask then early night with my quit lit

Day 2 nearly done. It's not too bad for me during the week but it'll be tomorrow evening when we'd normally have a cheeky something when it'll bite. I'm planning to do myself a pedicure so as to keep my hands busy. A bad night's sleep for me too last night but I think that was knowing I had some sad news to break at work to a colleague rather than anything else.

@Comeonicandoit - can you try imagining you're on antibiotics and that having anything alcoholic will make you really really ill? I've done that before and found it worked ok.

Thanks for the encouragement @BulldogMumma and everyone <raises cup of tea>

@TonstantWeader tomorrow will be hard for me too because it's the weekend, I was drinking every night so I'm going to treat it the same as last night and tonight.
I've had a shower and got my foot pack on, I'm watching Emmerdale with a cup of tea ☕️

I've just found some blue becks hidden in the fridge. Yes!
I'm feeling the need tonight but I find one of these takes the edge off. They are a good alternative for me

@hby9628 ooh I like a Becks Blue too, might get some in for the weekend

Well so much for my early night and feeling better for it. The early night went as planned. And then DH woke me up coming to bed just after midnight, followed by DS waking me up at 1am going to the toilet. And then failed to get back to sleep for ages. So tick for not drinking but not for an improved night's sleep!

Will try again tonight...

As for the how to avoid temptation question, pure stubbornness! Failure would be admitting I've got a problem, and I don't want to have to do that. It's not a good reason, but it works.

It's as good a reason as any @BookShark . Anything that keeps us going is good.

I'm off to bed to read. So tired today. To be fair, I did rip it up on NYE. Definitely not recovering as quick as I did in my younger days.

Quite pleased so far though. Thursday is a regular booze night for me, this is the first Thursday in a very long t, maybe a couple of years, I've not had a drink (got plastered).

I have a massage booked in for tomorrow after work. The weekend will be when my inner voice starts to tell me I'm fine, I feel great, just have a wine.

It's our last night of hols and we went out for dinner. One AF beer for me (that I didn't even finish!). I was observing everyone else and what they were drinking and feeling that pang when seeing the white wine drinkers.

I then reminded myself that it is poison and they can probably have one and stop or maybe not and they will feel rubbish in the morning.

Lots of mental gymnastics going on but it remained a sober night. I'll be glad to be in my home bubble tomorrow night and as long as I don't buy any on the way home from the airport I won't drink.

@BulldogMumma it was lovely. Had it in the bath with my candle lit. Going to paint my nails now

Took me 90 mins to drink. I'd be nearly a bottle of Prosecco down by now usually

Day 2 complete despite an unexpected mother "drama"- but I threw away the Bailey's I had added to my hot choc, and made a fresh AF cup.
Well done, everyone too!

Day 2 done, slept a solid 10hrs last night, I love sober sleep 😴