An unexpected Day 1 of sobriety

[freshstart321]

I was browsing on here this morning and read a thread that someone had started asking about the positives of not drinking. Someone on the thread recommended the book 'The Sober Diaries'. I downloaded it onto my Kindle.

Reading the book is almost like reading about myself. There are so many moments where I think 'that's me'. I've just read the part where she mentioned that the tooth fairy had been late a few times due to drinking the night before. The last time my youngest's tooth came out, only a few weeks ago, I drunk a bottle of wine once the children were in bed then went to bed myself and the tooth fairy didn't arrive. My son found it funny that she was late, but I was mortified.

It's time I stopped drinking. Properly. Not just had a couple of days off and then opened a bottle of wine with food on a Thursday evening because it was almost the weekend and then proceeded to drink for the next 4 or 5 days but then feel good due to my 2 days off.

The questions the author asks in the book about whether she is an alcoholic because she doesn't drink in the morning, she can go a few days without, etc etc all ring so true to me. I am definitely very dependent on alcohol.

100 days from today I am taking my children on holiday (I am a single parent). My aim is to reach the airport without having touched a drop of alcohol from today. 100 days alcohol free. I also hope it will help with the many pounds I've gained, with my anxiety and depression, with my awful sleep and so many other things.

Day 1 of freedom.....here we go

I dream a lot more now.

I've gone down a lot of Google wormholes on this! Alcohol dulls your sleep processes, and reduces your REM sleep, which is one of the most important aspects, and when you dream the most.

Therefore, going no-alcohol lets that aspect loose.

This happens to me whenever I stop! It's crazy, like the alcohol was dulling your brain.

At least the vivid dreams are normal (even though the majority are very strange!!). Day 8 today and at the moment I'm finding it relatively easy. I'm sure not every day will be like this but definitely making the most of these days.

Well done, I'm on day 9 it's going well so far, did miss it at the weekend but had some alcohol free kopperberg.

Well done @greenose I think alcohol free alternatives were my saviour this weekend. I haven't touched one this week though, it must be a psychological thing for me!

Day 9 for me today. Having an alcoholic drink crossed my mind today. Only briefly, but it did. I am so proud of myself for 9 days sober though. I truly can't remember when I went this long without alcohol.

Whoop whoop @freshstart321 ! You're totally allowed to think "wish I could have a drink", but then you don't and you are ah-mazzz-ing!

Day 11. The last 2 days have been full of wanting to drink. This evening I took my children and the dog to the beach for a walk and the beer gardens overlooking the sea were full of people enjoying a drink or 2 in the sun. Last night I put my pyjamas on before 6pm so that going to pick up a bottle of wine would involve me getting dressed again so not quite as quick and easy as jumping in the car to go to the shop and would mean I had extra time to stop and think. This evening I opened a bottle of alcohol free prosecco and I'm drinking that. My period started yesterday, and I know it's not quite the same as chocolate cravings but I'm wondering if that has something to do with why I'm really feeling like I want a drink and having to be very determined not to have one.

You’re doing really well. What I would say is that you’re very early into sobriety and you’re entering a dangerous zone around 2 weeks in where the novelty of not drinking has worn off a bit but new habits haven’t been formed yet to start getting the longer term benefits. So do whatever you have to to stay off the drink. Eat chocolate, cake, sweets, treats to reward yourself. Don’t worry about being super healthy and depriving yourself. It’ll still be healthier than wine. Just keep going. One day at a time.

I did dry January in 2023 and have barely touched a drop since. I loved a drink, but post menopause it just left me feeling groggy and tired, no buzz at all.
I still like the ritual of an end of the day drink, so have AF beer (Peroni) and cider (Rekorderlig) and Nozeco with elderflower cordial is my fave to start the evening.
Good luck,
Has anyone mentioned the book called The unexpected joy of being sober by Catherine Gray

The weekend hasn't gone too well unfortunately. The meal venue for last night changed to a local pub. I arrived, reached the bar snd ordered a pinot grigio. I ended up having 3 (187mls each I think). I was home by 9:30 and didn't have anything else which is positive for me as I would usually continue drinking if I arrived home early. This evening I have had the lonely cider that has been in my fridge for a few weeks. It did cross my mind earlier in the day to get a bottle of wine, but I didn't so it is just the 1 bottle (500mls) of cider. I am not having anything else today, and will be back on day 1 tomorrow.

Here with you, I've decided to cut out alcohol completely, I'm using it as a social crutch and just something to pass the time as a treat at the weekend. I'm so bloated ATM, I don't think fizz actually agrees with me. Time to pull my finger out. Had a lot of water today and a small glass of orange juice. Day 2 tomorrow

@freshstart321 it sounds like you have avoided pressing the 'fuck it button'. The last week and a half still count as progress in my eyes, despite this bump in the road. Keep it up

This may happen again, it's completely normal. You just pick yourself up and start again.
I log every day I am alcohol free on a google calendar. When I look over the last 48 days I can see that 30 days out of 48 I was sober. So I drank 18 times in that period. Had I not been trying to cut out alcohol it would have been 48 days of drinking alcohol, zero days sober.
If you look at it from that perspective over a large amount of time, one day or a couple of days drinking isn't a failure as long as you can get back on your streak.
Good luck to you, you have done amazingly well so far, don't give up.

Thank you!

Today is day 1 again. I have been logging every day on the Try Dry app (I think someone here suggested it) and will continue to do so. I am feeling proud that I only had 1 drink yesterday. A previous Sunday would have involved a few drinks (as it was still the weekend). I'm going away by myself next weekend but planning on taking a big selection of af drinks so won't be touching alcohol.

Really good that you posted, @freshstart321

As a PP said, it's all too easy to get into fuck-it mode and start a stream of drinks or even several days.

Day 3 today and my MIL was round for my toddlers birthday and she is fairly testing...I'd usually treat myself to a glass for biting my tongue and not saying anything but just had a glass of orange juice and brought myself up to bed now she's left