Hello, I’m drinking a bottle of wine a night, sometimes more, and really need to stop. I feel hungover much of the time with all that entails - tiredness, irritability, nausea, no energy, anxiety through the roof. The alcohol means I’m not looking after myself either - my sleep is disrupted (hence typing this at 4am), I eat junk food to counter the hangover, my skin is dry and sometimes I even fall into bed without brushing my teeth 😔 I’m spending a fortune that I can’t afford and whilst I enjoy my job and am getting by at work, my performance would no doubt be far better if I was 100% alert and clear-headed at all times. Most importantly, I’m a mum and want to be a better, more energetic parent.
I’ve been reading other posts on this forum and one thing others seem to emphasise is the importance of addressing why we drink. For me it’s self esteem - I have struggled with social and general anxiety since primary school, have never liked myself very much and have little confidence. I have had therapy to tackle this and have just restarted sertraline too, which has helped my anxiety in the past. But turning to alcohol has always been a quick and easy way to block out negative thoughts and escape, at least for a few hours.
Anyway, I didn’t drink yesterday (first time in ages) and am hoping to not drink today, or the next day, or the day after that. I can’t commit to any more at this stage, because whenever I’ve set myself a bigger target like a whole month off, it feels so daunting that I inevitably give in and am back on the wine.
Thanks for reading and here’s to day 2.