Nothing works!

[Winegirl]

I've name changed for this as I'm not sure if it's appropriate, or maybe people will think I'm ridiculous.

I drink around 80 units of wine a week. Have done for a long time, I'm middle aged. I so wish I could stop and I have spent years reading everything there is to know about effects, how to moderate, going sober, there's probably not much I couldn't tell you about all the negatives of alcohol.

But nothing works. I think this is partly to do with the fact that I haven't suffered any negative effects from alcohol so far, other than weight gain, I'm also in peri. Another reason, I think, is that I have family members who are much older than me who have drank in the same way and they have not suffered any serious ill effects and I tell myself I'll be fine.

I'm a very black and white thinker and deal in facts, not averages, and have a it won't happen to me mentality, even although I think about it every single day.

So what I'm asking is, does anyone have real life stories of drinking between a bottle and a bottle and a half of wine every night, and how it ended up in the end health wise? I think this may help, due to what I've said above, and also the niggling voice in my head that tells me it's only wine, it's the spirits that do the real damage.

Thank you

My mum was in hospital recently (not alcohol related) and one of the nurses mentioned they are seeing a sharp increase in the number of middle aged women with severe alcohol related illness. He commented they are drinking at least a bottle of wine a night and don't think it's a problem, then suddenly it is.
So I don't think you can always see it coming.
I cut back massively recently. I decided I should look after myself properly. So instead of seeing it as a negative, I reframed it as something that was all for me. I'm sleeping better and my skin is better. I now have a few drinks a week but my tolerance has gone through the floor and I don't want more than one or two

Thank you. I have signed up to the OYNB challenge today, the 3 month one. I have never tried this sort of thing before but I really want to commit and give it a shot, so here goes......

Day 1

I hope that it brings you more than it takes- please do keep in touch here, this has been a really thought provoking thread and I commend your courage and honesty, as well as that shown by other posters.

Well done OP! You can do this

You have got to REALLY want to stop for a start you seem more concerned with carrying on as long as your health is ok …..no amount of alcohol is good on your body in reality….alcohol got to grips with me in Covid I was drinking a litre of barcardi or more a week tbh I really enjoyed it 5 years solid week in week out ….I stopped in January because I WANTED TOO for myself …health wise (hope I haven’t done any damage ) I want to live a long life …I want to be there for my children…I want to be there for my grandchildren…so many positive reasons alcohol is a killer end of

Good luck. Please let us know how you get on, if you feel able to. I’ll be thinking of you. Alcohol has been problematic for so many people I know and often they don’t admit it until it is far too late to reverse the damage.

Alcohol has been problematic for so many people I know and often they don’t admit it until it is far too late to reverse the damage.

Yes indeed - and this is one of the many reasons why alcoholism is such a terrible thing.

Thank you for your kind words. I will update 🙏

Thank you I will update, hopefully positively.

Hi everyone,

I just thought I'd come back and update a little of how it's been so far. So for about a month after I last posted I was stringing days together then lapsing for a few days and nothing was really changing I felt, but since June I have stayed sober consistently, other than 2 one off occasions. One was a loss and I drank a bottle of wine the night it happened, the other was a planned night out. Both times I only drank on the one night and didn't fall back to familiar habits, so other than these 2 occasions I haven't drank in 3 months.

I know it's early days and I'm taking nothing for granted, but I'm feeling so at peace and grateful right now. I still think about drinking regularly, but it doesn't feel like the compulsion it was before, it feels now that I am making the choice not to drink because I just don't want to. I just keep taking one day at a time and slowly they just keep adding up.

I also want to thank everyone again who contributed to my thread with their thoughts and experiences, it was so appreciated

That is absolutely fantastic!! You should be so proud of yourself! You've inspired me to really cut down too, so thank you 😊

Thank you 😊

OP, I love your update and am cheering you on.

Keep going, be kind to yourself and know that every day, your mind and body are recovering.

Have you been able to add any new, calming/nice/active things to your life? You said you live rurally. Can I recommend something like Yoga With Adriene? (I found it so boring at first – and then it becomes magic.) Or get yourself a nice flask and have a coffee/tea walk in the mornings.

Really pleased to hear your update, had wondered how you are getting on. Be proud of your achievement and well done !

Well done OP! this is brilliant

I'm so very pleased to see your update OP, well done indeed to you. Amazing!

Thank you 😊

I've recently attempted baking cakes! 😀Yea, I should look at the Yoga, it's something I've always been interested in but never got round to. Maybe soon. I'm not getting any younger! 😫😂

Thank you! 😊

Hope you're doing ok

Alot of people on here haven’t quite got there facts straight op and the suggested tapering off keeps people drinking when the reality is it’s highly unlikely you are physically addicted I mean suffering from physical symptoms! A lot of people are scared to give up because of this misinformation I suggest you follow Khodi in recovery he’s amazing and from America literally decades ahead of us when it comes to medical care! I went through a period of drinking like this for almost a year yes I was terrified that first evening I put it down but the night before that instead of drinking 1-1 and a half bottles of wine I had x2 glasses ate my dinner went to bed woke up with no hangover symptoms and I knew come that night I was ready it’s easier to do when your not hungover I just stopped it really is as easy as that! I can moderate now I can drink very normally now and have x1 glass if out for a meal etc but it’s very rare xxx

I listened to a podcast about Naltrexone, you take it while drinking and it blocks the fun part of alcohol and makes it easier to have more and more days without it.

www.thestranger.com/features/2018/12/19/37093776/this-drug-could-change-alcohol-addiction-treatment-forever

I know a few people who have done this (it's called The Sinclair Method.) very successful indeed (although one friend had to stop the pills as they made her so sick- but also had the side effect of putting her off alcohol completely and she is practically teetotal now (was a dangerous drinker before.))
The science does seem to support it, if it's followed properly.

OP, have only just seen this thread, but I’m glad I found it. When you started it you asked for essentially horror stories of peoples experiences at the hands of alcohol, some suggested you shouldn’t read them as it won’t help, but I disagree, it REALLY helps.

Im 42, I got alcohol induced pancreatitis at the beginning of 2023, I’m not allowed to drink at all, and it’s a lonely place as nobody understands. My childhood and teenage years were ruined by my parents, family and people around me drinking alcohol, everyone always thinks that their children don’t notice if they drink, but even one glass has a negative impact on children.

I’ve started a couple of threads on here and something I’ve noticed is how defensive people get about alcohol, people don’t want to hear that it’s a dangerous drug and suggest that people like me are the ones with the problem, nobody believes that actually a lot of us who suffer the consequences of alcohol were no different to many other drinkers, it’s just bad luck.

People drink purely because of the effects, nothing else, any of us who have ever drank alcohol enjoy the buzz, it’s why it’s such a powerful and dangerous drug, it’s a dangerous neurotoxin and ruins so many lives.

I knew how shit alcohol was from my youth, but eventually pier pressure got me to drink and of course that’s it, now I can’t anymore and hearing others devastating stories helps me to remember what this stuff does to the human body, there are no physical benefits to it, I commend you for the progress you’ve made, I’ve still not found anyone who really understands this lonely place, because most people can still drink, and when you are addicted, which all drinkers are, you can’t see it, I mostly get shouted at for daring to suggest there is no real point to alcohol in the modern world, but I get it!

Thank you for your post, I've only just seen it 😊I agree with everything you said. Even when I was drinking it made me very angry how the dangers of alcohol are minimised in society. It is basically poison in a bottle, and while I knew this when I was drinking, (in later years), I just couldn't stop.

Yea, people get very defensive which I find difficult to understand, I mean, if you're going to drink, then fine, just own it. No matter how much you protest, it doesn't change the facts that there are no benefits to drinking alcohol. None. If it was introduced today it would be illegal.

I'm sorry you feel alone in this. Are you suffering health issues due to the pancreatitis? Are you not feeling a strength in your sobriety?

Hi @Winegirl thanks for the response, I appreciate it, and thanks for the thread, I really thought it was a good one. I hope it picks up again, there is a good one in alcohol support that is stories all about the end of everyone’s journeys with alcohol. I’m doing ok, I do have lasting problems from the pancreatitis, namely something called a pseudocyst, but am doing well. I’m finding the person I was before drink entered my life and the benefits to not drinking alcohol are incredible really, I always knew the stuff was bad, but you get sucked into the hype, but it is just poison, that is literally all it is, it’s a drug to target that core in your brain and dull it, that’s why humans like it, but the arguments back to me on here are always ‘I enjoy the flavour’, no you don’t, you are returning for the effect!

But don’t ever try to say that on here, the arguments you get in return are, it was in the bible, it’s woven through all social occasions, people used to drink weak versions instead of water blah blah blah, but they don’t want to admit they like feeling pissed on drugs and no one ever wants to talk about the HUGE list of medical and societal problems it’s always been responsible for, I don’t know, there are so many stories of ‘normal’ drinkers that this catches up to, i wish people would keep telling these real life tales, I saw the effects of it around me in hospital, we see it everywhere, it has to be shown more to demonstrate what this does to humans. But of course it’s always the next man and never the individual that has a problem.

My closest friend hasn’t been to visit me since 2022, through my mum’s death and two hospital stays, there has been murmurs we should arrange a meet, but I think because I don’t drink anymore, a visit is not as interesting to them, that’s a common theme I read from those who stop drinking.

How are you OP? Are you still keeping away from booze? I hope you are well. Thanks for answering my post, had forgotten about that one, when I see I’ve been quoted in my notifications my heart always skips a beat, I just naturally assume I’m about to be told off 😂