Medical detox - handhold please

[SignalLoss]

I have had a physical assessment and am seeing a doctor tomorrow to discuss medication requirements. I am motivated to stop, but also scared. Anyone with experience of this? Thank you.

Day 4 yesterday was ok, my mood was a bit low. BP also low, a combination of the meds I’m already on, Librium and no alcohol. I went to bed early and feeling brighter today.

@alco I will see the nurse weekly for the next while and when alcohol free for six weeks I can be referred for CBT, although there is a waiting list. I think I have a fair bit to unravel. I hope you are doing ok now. I’m not one to journal either, but I thought if I post on here it will give me something to look back on if I have a wobble. I have a feeling the next week or so will be tricky until the acamprosate takes effect.

@Avatartar @QueefQueen80s thank you so much for the support, I really do appreciate it x

Once you have finished your detox they can give you Naltrexone which stops the cravings, you need to take this for at least 3 months.

Brilliant that you're feeling brighter this morning @SignalLoss your body is readjusting to being free of alcohol. @alco is right I'd forgotten that dreams come back and can be really intense. Just think how proud the you of a week ago would be to see you now. Day 5! Thinking of you x

It doesn't have to be AA but are there any alcohol support groups near you? It is really helpful to talk to people who understand exactly how you feel. It makes you feel like you're not alone.

Full of admiration for you @SignalLoss . You are doing so well. Don't ever underestimate how very brave you are to admit that you need help and to undertake the detox. That takes great courage and strength.

There will be grim times - but you are on your way to winning. Keep posting and sharing your story, it might help you and may also give strength to unknown others who are facing similar.

I am AF now, but have had many grim years behind me. It's still hard, but going in the right direction. I can remember (vaguely) my first detox in hospital. I screamed the place down because giant Alsatian dogs were climbing up the outside walls. 😖

Everyone finds different things helpful in their own personal situation. For me, I have found the books "The Sober Diaries" by Clare Pooley and "The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober" by Catherine Gray to be non-patronising and helpful.

Keep going. You can do this. It will be alright. xx

So day 8 is almost done! I started the acamprosate on Friday, slightly nauseous but otherwise fine. I haven’t had any severe cravings, but did miss my usual Friday gin to start the weekend. Had a fentimans rose lemonade instead.

My dreams have been vivid, I am still tired in the evening, but feel much more refreshed in the morning. I also have more time for skincare and reading at night rather than passing out on the sofa.

@alco there is a charity that does group meetings, but I’m not sure if that’s for me. I am feeling supported by all you lovely mumsnetters for now!

@REP22 thats great you are AF now, your journey sounds much more difficult than mine, you’ve done brilliantly. Thank you for the reading recommendations.

For anyone thinking of getting help I would absolutely encourage them. I found it scary, daunting and was ashamed. The nurses have all been amazing and had no judgment whatsoever. It took me a lot of determination but I have felt the benefits already; more present in the moment and most of all more time.

Just posting to say well done, and to offer encouragement for you to continue. You're doing great. Keep on going, and think of all the potential benefits. This might be one of the best things you ever do for yourself, even though it's hard at times it will be worth it.

YES! Go you @SignalLoss that's brilliant you're on day 8! Now your body doesn't need alcohol it's just about creating new habits and slowly it will become your new normal. I love the rose lemonade too. And AF corona zero for barbecues :)

I did go to a few AA meetings at the beginning (was before covid so in person) but then I felt strong enough to just face it myself. Personally I didn't find it useful to my recovery to keep dwelling on the past after a while. I made my amends and started my new way of life. For me, the best amend is being the real authentic me, sober me, the one who got lost when the drinking was at its worst. Words are cheap, my husband must have heard me say I needed to give up a zillion times. but just living your life, notching up week after week of sobriety, showing you are sticking to your promises, is incredibly healing. Actions speak louder than words.

I gave him a breathalyser and told him he could ask me to blow into it any time. He did, loads at first, but I was done. it was always 0. In the end it's just between you and yourself, it always was.

Keep going and keep letting us know how u feel. So proud of u X

I think you are doing so well giving it a go - and the last thing you need is someone making out that a bottle of wine a night plus some over a long period. TBH I experienced this and then it gradually crept up, as it does, so dealing with this now is amazing. X

Hope you're ok @SignalLoss. Thinking of u

@SignalLoss Hi how's it going? How was the weekend?

@VoldemortsKitten I owe a lot to AA I really do. But I haven't been for a few weeks now and I do feel for now I might not go any more. There is too much looking back. I have looked back and dealt with what I needed to and really grown as a person enormously. You are right the only amends we can really make is showing those we love that we have changed. That's what I do too.

So day 16, I can’t quite believe it!

I felt fairly low this last week and didn’t want to post anything too negative. To be fair it was a rubbish week. More than one unexpected expense in the £100’s and issues with DC being bullied during a school week away. I was teary and my anxiety was high, ‘D’P assures me I was more than a bit moody! I guess I didn’t have the usual go to of a bottle to make it all seem better and actually had to face life without it being masked. I also took another week off work as I’ve have been very tired. I’m sleeping better at night, usually just waking once and getting back to sleep quickly. I seem to hit a wall early afternoon and have slept up to two hours most days. The nurse says that it’s probably down to the stress on the body of detox and possibly the heat. I have an appointment with her on Wednesday and she will check BP in case it has dropped too low.

Thanks @SamSam111 for the encouragement and to @VoldemortsKitten and @alco for checking in on me.

I’m still feeling optimistic overall. I haven’t had any severe cravings and will try my best to keep going. Thanks again for the support, you are all lovely 💐

Well done OP, that’s a fantastic achievement! Hopefully the daily battle will become easier and with those unexpected costs, just think how much you’ve saved towards it by not drinking and how much more money you’d have had to find. Keep going, you can do it!

Sorry you've had a grim week, @SignalLoss - especially sorry about your DC.

But you are doing so, SO well, especially in the face of adversity. Don't underestimate the strength and courage it has taken to get you this far. You're amazing.

Keep going. It will get better. xx

Keep going OP, nice to hear your update. You are rocking it 🖤

Hope the BP appointment went well @SignalLoss you're doing brilliantly. Sleep as much as you need, the first few weeks your body is recalibrating itself. Are you still having really vivid dreams? Proud of u x

Day 23 almost done.
I’m am still really tired and napping at least once a day as well as a good 8-9 hours a night. I spoke to the nurse as I am worried about my work. It’s hybrid but I’m definitely not as productive as I should be. She said it could be the acamprosate but it’s been over two weeks now and I expected side effects to lessen. I can stop it if I want for a few days however I haven’t had any major cravings and don’t want them to start now. BP is still all over the place which can also cause tiredness along with the detox taking it’s toll. All in all I’m a bit stuck on what to do and feeling quite flat. Where’s all the extra energy I was expecting?
Sorry to moan. I hope everyone else is doing ok and thanks to all who have read this far!

Hang in there, you sound like you are doing amazing. Really well done!

@SignalLoss Thank you for the update; you're doing so well, really. The energy will come. It takes time but it will get better. Keep going. You're amazing. xx

Day 1.
Gutted.

@SignalLoss it's a slip, they happen, identify the triggers but don't dwell on it or beat yourself up.

It's one slip, it is in the past, don't lose sight of the 30+ days where you were strong and didn't give in. You can do this.

Thank you @AltitudeCheck . On a day out with a nice meal and I had a glass of wine. Disappointed in myself but glad I stopped at that.

Hope you're ok @SignalLoss and any withdrawal is minor. Your brain is still literally hot wired to see having a drink as the solution, it can take a few false starts to get free of it. Don't be too hard on yourself and don't let it put you off trying again. Very brave to post here too when it would have been easier to just drift away. we are all rooting for you ❤️

You have done really well to stop at 1. It's not starting over in a negative way. You are continuing, because what you have learnt in the last month or so is invaluable to you.

I hadn't seen your last update. The first few weeks/ months are such a rollercoaster.

Yeah our messages crossed. Totally understand the nostalgia of having a glass of wine with dinner and u did well to only have one. The only danger is that it leads you back where you were. No one else can tell you whether that will def happen, but a lot of us can say that's what happened for us. X