The moderating drinker - anyone care to join?

[notanotherusernameidea]

I'm at a stage in life where I'm aware I drink too much. I would say I drink 5 nights a week, probably consume best part of a bottle on these nights.
Ironically I work in healthcare so you would think I would know better.
I don't want to be tee-total but I'm aware I need to reduce my alcohol intake.
Is there anyone similar who would like to join this thread and maybe we can support eachother?

Yes I will if you like. I probably drink nearly every night though. It's purely habit. I'm also in healthcare and definitely should know better! Tonight will be (relatively) easy as I've none in the house and I'm going to need to do some work later so need a really clear head. My risk always is starting a glass as I'm making the kids' supper then collapsing with the rest of the bottle in front of crap TV once they're in bed. It's neither enjoyable nor productive.

I hear you @Foxesinsockses !
Every week I have this talk with myself. Monday is fine. Tuesday is a wobble. Then wine Wednesday appears and then we drink each night telling ourselves we will be better next week 😬

We have said we are going to allow ourselves Friday and Saturday night drinking (as in tonight and tomorrow) but then we have to get a grip. Sunday is always a struggle not to have a relaxing bottle of wine between us (DH and I) on the sofa in the evening.

So this weeks goal is no drinking Sunday through to Thursday. It's gonna take a lot of will power but we've worked out we probably spend around £250 a month on wine 😬

I took my BP a while ago and was shocked at how high it was. That was enough for me to stop this very unhealthy habit.

I saw a programme that monitored 3 groups of women. Group one drank within the recommended units per week, group two 28 units and group three 36+ units. All 3 groups saw a drop in BP, after abstaining for a month.

I have had the odd glass of wine, but nowhere near what I was drinking before. Going forward I plan to only drink socially, and a planned amount.

How are you feeling today, OP?

I’ll join you. I live with a highly functioning alcoholic who has only just started seeing a psychologist. I’m hoping that will help him drink less.

I drink most nights and I’d like to have more alcohol free nights as I feel I waste so much time

I'm in too! I can completely resonate with OP, let's do this together

Can I join? I probably drink most of a bottle 4 nights a week but the guilt the next day is getting unbearable. I’d like to cut down to half a bottle 3-4 nights a week

Hey guys, how are we getting on? I read Catherine Gray's fab 'The unexpected joy of being sober' a couple of years ago which at the time really struck a chord with her downward spiral, and her journey to sobriety was so inspiring, and genuinely not patronising. So, two years have passed and it's a distant memory. I'm going to re-read it, and have just ordered her journal to help. In my head I don't want to be teetotal, I want to just have a couple of drinks, but I don't know if that's possible for me

Hiya sorry only just seen these messages so will reply properly later.
I managed nothing Monday and Tuesday then last night I caved after a stressful day. Feel shite today. Absolutely nothing tonight other than water!

@notanotherusernameidea you still did well Mon/Tue! For me it's easier to have something else to do when I get in from work for a couple of hours. My dogs have never been walked so much, lucky it's nice weather for now

@notanotherusernameidea

Hiya sorry only just seen these messages so will reply properly later. I managed nothing Monday and Tuesday then last night I caved after a stressful day. Feel shite today. Absolutely nothing tonight other than water!

It's good that you had a couple of days off OP, I know how hard that is. It's possible that the alcohol that you last consumed was still having an affect days later, so that the stress you were feeling was exacerbated by that. So the 'cure' is to drink to relieve the stress, whereas it's actually the alcohol causing the stress in the first place. I too work in healthcare, and yea it's stressful, particularly at the moment. However I have really noticed a difference since quitting alcohol during the week. And hugely limiting what I have on Saturday night.

It think it was Alan Car who said it's like wearing tight shoes all day, just for the relief of taking them off. We crave the alcohol to relieve the stress, that alcohol creates.

Can I join in? My half-bottle habit is becoming more like 2/3 three or four nights a week. At the weekends I drink the whole thing and maybe a gin or a couple of beers unless I'm driving in the morning. My Fitbit instantly registers the change as my drinking increases or decreases.

I'm in my 40s and think I've developed alcohol-related indigestion which wakes me up and scares me some nights. I also had glandular fever a couple of years ago and even though the nurse initially freaked me out by misdiagnosing, telling me my liver was failing and asking how much I drank, that brief feeling of fear hasn't taught me a lesson.

I also don't want to give up drinking completely but I definitely need to cut down.

Can I join too please?

I've been doing this for a month or so now. I've started by just cutting out booze Mon-Wed and only having one drink on a Thurs (I work Mon- Thurs). I found this made me drink slower at the weekend (no idea why) so that had made me drink less! I wasn't always perfect, but had a max of one drink and only as a social thing. I've also been watching how much beer I drink, as I don't drink beer very mindfully!!

This week was very stressful at work so I decided I was ok to drink every night, and decided not to beat myself up about it. I found I drank less than I would have done previously, which is positive.

I must not drink Mon-Wed this week though or else it will become habit again. I'm also going to drink fizzy water every night at 10pm other than Friday night and Saturday night when I'll drink it at 11pm. I really like fizzy water late at night, so this should help limit intake.

Going forwards, I also think I'm absolutely not drinking on a Monday, but if I really want one drink on Tuesday or Wednesday then I'll have one - but this should be the exception rather than the rule!

Good luck everyone

@PurpleFresias

Hey guys, how are we getting on? I read Catherine Gray's fab 'The unexpected joy of being sober' a couple of years ago which at the time really struck a chord with her downward spiral, and her journey to sobriety was so inspiring, and genuinely not patronising. So, two years have passed and it's a distant memory. I'm going to re-read it, and have just ordered her journal to help. In my head I don't want to be teetotal, I want to just have a couple of drinks, but I don't know if that's possible for me

I know friends that have had to go teetotal. I'm hoping that I can just moderate as I've just gotten into bad habits, which I'm trying to break!

I'm in! I was drinking a bottle most nights and I've reduced it now to a half bottle 3x per week which is 14 units roughly.

I like a glass of wine and two glasses is just enough but I am terrible with will power so if it's open, I'll drink it. Same for a lot of things - not just alcohol. I've found a lovely Rioja in 37ml bottles so I buy one of those, drink one glass while making dinner and another with my meal and that's enough.

37cl not ml!

I’ve drank less this past week. I’m getting into the habit of doing something else when I come home from work for an hour or two then only having two or three drinks (more at weekend) which is a lot less than I used to. I’m aiming for two alcohol free nights next week. Might need some moral support :)

Read Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck. I read it with the intention of cutting back and oops.. it made me quit completely. Two years 3 months and I'm never going back to that shite. Moderation was so bloody difficult that I am happy to go without.

anyone still around? I have to cut down. I've put on so much weight mostly from wine. Would like to cut out alcohol during the week and cut down at the weekend

Same here Fork! I’ve put on loads of weight and probably made some silly spending decisions too because of it! I would love to not drink at all Monday to Thursday.

Hello I’d like to join. Not had a drink for over a week now. Just suddenly came to the realisation that my relationship with alc hasn’t been that amazing over the years. Familiar story I think - started going out at the W/e’s at age 16, binge drinking (along with everyone else) at uni. Friends just all seemed to be doing the same. Went into the world of work where there was a drink culture. Got married, had 2 kids, more vino - a lot of my mum friends drink wine/gin on the evenings so it just seems so normalised. But I know it’s not and I know the volume has massively increased over the years. Also taken it too far many times (childhood trauma) had way too much and regretted it - the anxiety!!! My MIL drinks like a fish and always tries to pop a drink in my hand whenever we are there and it’s like it’s a big thing if you don’t drink - so hard. Any advice/tips/support or anything greatly welcomed!

Can I join in too please? I need to be accountable somewhere. I drink probably 5 nights out of 7 and weekly I'm having up to 30 units. I've been drinking like this for years and I know it's not good for me. I'm rarely drunk, but I want to cut down. I'm trying to stop drinking in the week, and if I only drink at weekends I'll be content with that.

I've ordered some 'three spirit' sample bottles to try. I like sitting down with 'a drink' to watch some TV before bed but I have struggled to find a decent alcohol free alternative. Some nights I'm happy with a cup of tea, but sometimes I really want a glass of something nice and a soft drink just doesn't cut it and I cave in.

I need to join in. We went out for lunch yesterday and I had a glass of wine which was lovely but then opened a bottle when we got back like a complete fucking idiot and finished it. Posted something really stupid on a colleague’s LinkedIn status and now feeling like a complete idiot. The anxiety today is insane and I’m getting so little out of my relationship with alcohol. There are times when a glass of wine is a genuine joy but so often it’s about drinking to fill time and shut our voices in my head and that’s not positive.

Am drinking a bottle of wine probably 5 nights a week and I’m beginning to seriously panic about the health impacts. Would like to keep drinking to social events and maybe just Friday and Saturday night at home.

Hi @Dollywilde. I'm the same, once I have one I want more!