I'm giving up drinking.

[WeAreAllAdults]

I'm writing this so I can come back and remind myself why I'm doing this when I feel weak.

I don't want to drink anymore. I don't want hang overs. I don't like how irresponsible I am drunk. I hate waking up and wondering what I did last night. I hate feeling guilt and remorse the next day. I hate that if I don't get to have a drink on a Friday night I get annoyed. I hate that I can't just have one without wanting more. I hate that my friends buy me alcohol for my birthday because they know I like a drink. I don't want to end up like my dad.

I don't want it. I don't need it.

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

I have just downloaded Allen Carr and have a confession to make: ever since I heard of his book, I thought it was written by Alan Carr, the comedian. I was expecting the book to be a lot funnier. 😂

[comfortablynumb1]

I can do this! I'm going to have a lovely chamomile (my auto correct just suggested champagne while typing that 🙄) and spiced apple tea that will help soothe my poor throat.
@seaweedandmarchingbands I have to say the Alan Carr you're thinking of has an amazing book too,it made me cry with laughter. But yes, this Allen Carr isn't as amusing I agree.

[Rupertpenrysmistress]

Second Allen Carr too, I had the audio version really helped me. Hope you all have a peaceful night.

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

I did, and now on day 6! So far so good. No cravings, and feel a lot more positive. Now, this is when the wine monster usually creeps back in... Lockdown!

[RaymondStopThat]

Hope you don't mind me popping on to say that a close family member had a huge problem with alcohol. He has been sober now for over 2 years and the thing that makes the difference for him is the Club Soda Alcohol Free FB group. It's a closed group, so I can't tell you much about it personally other than it offers a huge amount of support in a safe environment. Apparently the majority of posters are women. Might be worth a look?

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Thanks, Raymond. As a teacher, my concern with Club Soda (which looks amazing) is anonymity. Half the people on there are probably my relations as well!

[RaymondStopThat]

You could make an anonymous FB profile if you have/get a second email address? I've got loads of email addresses for sign up special offers etc.

[femininefrillsandfurbelows]

Just thinking about how often we are bombarded with messages about how it’s acceptable/normal/desirable to drink.

Today I googled ‘autumn walks’ and ‘afternoon tea’, for different reasons. The autumn walks search came back with ‘autumn pub walks’ (don’t want a pub, just a walk). The ‘afternoon tea’ search came back with a few variations on Prosecco, champagne, ‘fizz’ etc. I just wanted sandwiches.

[comfortablynumb1]

Day 6 here! Feel so happy that I didn't give in to the voice last night and have wine. Didn't sleep that well. I was awake at 4.30a due to the heavy rain but I wasn't lying there for once hating myself and sweating alcohol, I just listened to the rain and felt cosy.

The adverts for alcohol seem to be EVERYWHERE.. every other advert on the underground is for Jack Daniels or some 50 year old whiskey etc. I never noticed it before now I can't unsee it. It's relentless.

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Definitely feeling the creep of the Friday night indecision. I’m reading Allen Carr, having lots of tea and sugar, and just focusing on waking up tomorrow feeling like enjoying the day instead of wishing it away.

[WeAreAllAdults]

Another one feeling the Friday creep here. This is where my true test begins... wish me luck. I've got to make sure I distract myself and do all the plans i set out earlier in the week when my resolve was a bit more steadfast! I'm going to do some housework and get an hour of German lessons in.

I'm going to wake up with a clear head tomorrow, treat myself to some new coffee I bought especially and head out on some early morning errands with my son.

Good luck everyone!

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Good luck!

That’s how we need to think about it: a little creep 😂

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Friday night witching hour: how are we doing? I’ve made and eaten dinner, am reading and in my pyjamas, and am not tempted to drink. About to review my day on my app, and looking forward to a peaceful weekend.

[comfortablynumb1]

Same, bath, pjs on.

Feeling okay about not drinking tonight as I have work tomorrow.
Tomorrow night will be the test I think. The voice starts when on the way home from work. It's what I've used to 'relax' for years so I've got to undo that thought process.

Hope everyone is having a lovely AF evening.

[rollon2020]

Hi all

Wondering if I can join?
I decided I needed to do something in August as I was drinking at least a bottle of wine a night and more on weekends. I realised there were no dry days and I was counting down until I could have a glass. It was really affecting my mental health.

Since then I've cut down loads and only drink at the weekends and just one bottle of wine between the two evenings. But last weekend it really affected my mood and I was up worrying and anxious all night!

So I just need to admit to my self I need to completely stop. I work every other weekend and feel like I need a glass of wine after!

My family are big drinkers although DH isn't,so it'll be family occasions I'll struggle with the most I think . We are visiting next weekend so I think that'll be my main challenge

[lilybetsy]

I was you. I stopped drinking on March 12th 2016. I haven't drunk since and my life is SO much better. I also have not done one embarrassing things since I stopped drinking, have had no awful embarrassing moments....

I wont lie and says its been easy - but it has been worth it!

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

I’m struggling with sleep at the moment. It’s hard to get to sleep, and I know being tired can have an impact on recovery. Does anybody have any good tips?

Welcome, rollon2020! This thread has helped me no end in these first few days. Hope it can be of help to you too.

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

lilybetsy

That’s brilliant!

[comfortablynumb1]

@seaweedandmarchingbands I've been taking my earphones to bed with me and dropping off with my audiobook or the headspace app which is helping me.

I'm trying to reprogram my brain to nod off without the anaesthetic of alcohol that it's had for years (either that or I was hungover and shattered from the night before and used to go off easy.)

Now I'm waking still in the night and not getting straight back to sleep but still not as tired as when I had a "full nights" sleep on the drink if that makes sense?

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Definitely makes sense. I’m having a hard time nodding off. I’ve bought some sleepy tea and I’m trying to cut out afternoon caffeine; maybe I can counter the effects of that last cup of coffee by sinking a bottle of wine, but if I’m sober it’s keeping me up!

[pennyhasdropped]

Hello all.! How we all getting on. After my blip Wednesday evening and the awful regret Thursday I've stayed off the wine since. Also had a good 3lb loss at SW on Friday so that's spurred me on. Sleep is so much better and I actually look more alive lol. Weekends are going to be tough I'm guessing as that's when it's nice to sit in front of the tv and have a tipple .. wish me luck 😬

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Good luck, penny. I’m watching a film and having a drink (herbal tea). Just reading through a list of typical withdrawal symptoms over thirty days, and reminding myself how much better I feel!

[Shiloh221]

Hello everyone I wanted to just highlight some of the points why I'm giving up/cutting down dramatically if anyone would like to add anything please do it's so I can come back to it again! I think this thread is so supportive 😊
Pros:
Helps me 'destress'
More confidence
Temporarily forget my troubles

Cons:
Making me fat
Skin is awful dry and ageing
Taking all my money and pouring it down the sink
Makes me miserable
Snappy
No patience with DP and DC
Contributes To drunken arguments
Lasting health damage
Addition creeping up on me slowly
Killed a family member at 45
Want to sleep all the time
No energy
Making mental health worse !!!

I'm sure I will think of more !!

[comfortablynumb1]

Good points to start with @Shiloh221 your cons far outweigh the pros by a long way.

I'm still hanging on here. Had a lovely takeaway with the family tonight and an early bath, I lit some candles and watched a film.

I got some new lovely spiced ginger teabags which I'm enjoying. Now I can't stop yawning so I'm thinking of heading to bed soon and waking up fresh tomorrow.

A massive difference to last Sunday where I realised I couldn't go on any more drinking the way I do.

I just want to get through to next Sunday now knowing I've made it two weeks and see the difference in my energy levels, skin, clarity etc I already feel better but I'm still having wobbles.

My god daughter is having her first communion soon and I've offered to go to church every Sunday with her mum (my friend) who is planning the communion.
I would never have done that even a few weeks ago as I knew I would be hungover and miserable. I've made a commitment to my friend so no going back for me.

[seaweedandmarchingbands]

Shiloh221

That’s a long list of cons, isn’t it? I certainly wouldn’t put myself forward as anyone to coach anyone (seven days here! 😂) but I might suggest you read Annie Grace/Allen Carr and come back to that list of pros again. It’s a myth that alcohol destresses you or gives you confidence. I agree it temporarily helps you to forget your troubles, but it also stops you addressing them!