This is long, really long, but a short summary is as follows.
My DH and 4 yr old ds are very keen to adopt again. I'm wavering a little, not least because DH is a workaholic so I will be doing all the childcare. DH does loads when he's here, but he's not here much and he often simply fails to come home when he said he would if he gets busy. He doesn't drive and DS's potential new school is a drive away so he will only be able to do the school run by taxi or a longish journey on train and tube, although I think he only did and average of one drop-off and pick-up per term at DS's old school which was 10 mins from his office. I'm sure you've heard me whinging about him before.
We were recently short-listed for a little girl (thread here). Since then DS has had a lot of trouble at school and we have removed him (long thread here). We told our social worker about this thinking (hoping on my part) that the little girl's social workers would pull out of meeting us. We met them yesterday and were very upfront that he had been showing behaviour issues in school and would be moving to a new school. We also said that we could be sure that he would be ok in the new school and that we didn't think it would be a good time to adopt another baby if DS didn't settle and had to be taken out again.
I think you can guess the rest, as with any job interview that you don't think you have a hope in hell with and are not sure that you want anyway, they chose us.
I am really torn. She is adorable (from her written info and photos), and her background and personality are so like DS was at that age. She is exactly the child that we would want if everything else in our lives was peaceful and orderly. But on the other hand if DS isn't happy at the new school (which he will start on Monday if he's accepted following our interview this Friday) and DH doesn't move back to live at home as he has promised (he spends 4 days a week abroad) then I am signing myself up for a couple of miserable years.
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.
Adoption
Lovely adoption types, come and say soothing words to me please
bran · 18/11/2008 20:06
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