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Adoption

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Advice on pursuing fertility treatment vs adoption :D

43 replies

Cosmos24 · 02/04/2024 20:25

Hi all, I've just joined this site a few days ago and want to start by saying thank you so much for all the honest and caring messages I have read through the adoption threads so far. They have been so helpful, I wondered if I could ask a question of my own...

Unfortunately my husband and I have had 3 miscarriages in the last 12 months, which has been really heart breaking. We had always said we would like to consider adoption as well as having biological children, but I guess we just started trying to grow our family the old fashioned way. Things have been a lot harder than expected and we've reached the point where we want to make decision on how we move forward - do we seek further fertility investigations/treatment or is it time to consider growing our family through adoption?

For years I have been very pro-adoption and always thought we would probably adopt as well as having biological kids. It hasn't been until recently though that I have really gained some level of understanding of the stresses and strains involved - both in the long application process (which I realise is necessary, but is obviously very tough) and then to quote one poster on here, the "lottery" in whether or not you end up with kids who are sadly so traumatised/affected by their poor start in life that their families are in crisis (someone said 1 in 3 chance).

I realise this is a hugely personal question, that no one can really answer for us, but I would be interested in hearing people's opinions/experiences of fertility treatment vs adoption. How did you decide on one over the other (including single adopters considering sperm donor)?

The main reason for considering adoption prior to our own fertility issues was the idea that I wanted to provide a loving home for a kid/kids who wouldn't otherwise have one. Realising they did nothing to deserve their difficult start in life, but fully deserve the best future possible (I meet a lot of people from abusive backgrounds through my work and can see the difference a loving home could make). But now I am wondering a) it seems there are more prospective adopters than kids so is that even necessary and b) if we would be able to cope with the stresses and strains of raising traumatised children - would we be the lucky ones who's kids have manageable challenges or would we end up hopeless/divorced?! There is a very reasonable chance we could be successful at a biological pregnancy in the future, but who knows...

As a bit of background we are both working stressful jobs, but I hope to take a year off (either maternity or adoption leave) and then work 2-3 days/week and am happy to change careers if the current job is too much with kids (either adopted or bio). We have a 4 bedroom house, so could in theory adopt 3 siblings and would definitely consider this, but I suspect 2 might be more than enough to start with!

Sorry I've written so much, I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of this! Entirely reasonably, the local services want 6 months of no fertility treatment/investigations before applying, and it already feels like such a long process, I guess I'm maybe putting too much pressure on us to figure this all out so we can get on with whatever decision we end up on...

Thank you!!

OP posts:
Italiangreyhound · 03/04/2024 00:00

Hi, I am so sorry to hear of your miscarriages.

We had fertility treatment, including with donor eggs, for as long as we could afford to. Then we looked into adoption. We already had a birth child, who was nine by the time we adopted a boy aged three.

Italiangreyhound · 03/04/2024 00:05

If you do decide to go down the adoption route, in your shoes, I'd want to make sure I had as many answers as possible about causes of the miscarriage.

I am curious about your age, if you are still quite young I really would want to know what the problems are caused by, the hospital should be doing investigations after three miscarriages.

All the very best.

Torvy · 03/04/2024 06:50

It is a tricky question, and as you say, very personal.

If I'm brutally honest, modern adoption is rarely the first choice for many people for a reason- it is often less straightforward and less forgiving than a birth child (although not always), and you are constantly thinking and juggling some very complex and ever changing situations. It is wise to consider carefully!

Yes, there are more prospective adopters, but that's not a reason to not begin the process, particularly if you have an element of your life that might make you particularly good parents to a specific child. The bedrooms situation for one sounds very positive, although I will caution as someone who adopted two siblings at once, it is certainly a bold choice, and three traumatised children is a lot to manage off the bat unless you have a significant support plan in place. There are many ways families can grow over time, and it may well be you start out with one child and another opportunity presents itself later on. However, some children may well fare best with all the love and attention of their parents poured into them, rather than having to negotiate multiple familial relationships. They deserve a home too! It would be great to be able to offer a child a bedroom and a sensory room for example, or consider a home gym set up if you can't get childcare.

Its also worth thinking about your lifestyle too in terms of whether you would be in crisis or not and whether it would be manageable, and this can be really personal. For example, our jobs and life centre around the school terms, and we make a point to go away and visit family every single holiday because we get to relax and get built in adult attention and grand parent
/aunt and uncle/cousin babysitting, even just so that we can eat a meal without being the ones who have had to cook and load the dishwasher as well. It means that every 6 weeks or so, we can have not a complete break but a change of scenery and the chance to take a breather. At one set of parents they are one of many boisterous cousins, and at the other they are the sole focus of their grandparents, so there are opportunities for us to let the foot off the pedal for a bit. Do you have the family set up to accomodate and allow you these breaks ? It is important to work out where you will fill your cup from and where your support network will be, and although it might change, it can help stave off a crisis. For other people they might have an excellent level of mental fortitude that comes from another area of life.

That being said, a crisis looks different for everyone. On the surface, and according to our Insta, our life looks relatively idyllic. One SAHM, one doing well in her career, two kids who are always out and about... but the reality is that it takes everything I have to keep any semblance of a home life going, and it is a fight and a battle to get the kids to a place where we need to be when we need to be there. It is not relaxing, and we dip in an out of crisis from week to week depending on how much either of us have in the tank. Crisis for us usually looks like losing the battle with housework and spending lots of time out and about, driving the short distance to school because the kids are too impulsive and reckless to be safe walking and locking the cat away for her own safety. It sounds insignificant, but if you are used to relaxing and having a quiet clean and tidy environment , it's amazing what a toll an overturned bag of flour can have on your mental health. It's never just flour, it means not baking the cake you had planned, a change in schedule, an extra trip to the shops, more mess to clean, another apology to extract from a belligerent 4 year old... I mean, Our kids were never really painted as manageable or easy, but you get the idea- some days flour on the floor is no big deal. Some days it is the straw that breaks the camels back.

You do learn as you go. For example, weve learned that our children don't do well indoors, and can tolerate a maximum of 2 hours in the house without stuff kicking off. One of the biggest things we have had to cope with is the continual movement and lack of relaxation unless they are asleep. I look in wonder at people who have PJ days and tell me that they didn't do much on the holiday and watched loads of TV, because the idea of a chilled out day that deviates from our routine sounds like bliss. We have a very specific order and time frame that currently cannot be moved from or else the kids think life is falling apart as they know it. So think no lie ins, shower and dressed in the same order at the same time, same breakfast (we've recently been able to introduce pancakes on a saturday) etc. My parents think we overschedule the children for days out during the holidays but they literally cannot cope with being in our house and trash the place unless they are physically exhausted. Not always intentionally, but they are high energy, active and curious with no off switch and a level of defiance that descends into dangerous behaviour unless managed carefully. That being said, they are bloody lovely, hilarious kids with a lot to give and so much love in their hearts that it's impossible to imagine our life without them.

It does get to a point in any fertility journey where a decision has to be made, so i understand that. The thing is, you will always have to reckon with the what if, and at some pijbt you need to choose your hard. Sometimes its helpful to have someone else say some of the harder thoughts so you know you are not alone. If adoption is the route, on your darkest days, you will probably wonder what if we had just kept going, surely it would have been successful and we would have had a bio child eventually and skipped out on some of the challenges we face. If you keep going and are successful in getting pregnant, you may feel guilt about it, or resent how long it took, or be cross with the child later on if they have difficulties because it took so long and so much effort to concieve them. If you keep trying and it doesn't work out, it could feel like time wasted with any adoption process and like you have possibly missed out on a child destined for you. These are all hard and and big feelings, and often unresolved- therapy can help clarify decisions and the intentions behind it, but to some extent the road not travelled may always haunt you. I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we had made different choices at different points of our journey. We didn't, so I don't dwell, but it is only human to think about it.

The thing I found hardest was letting go of when deciding to go for adoption was what i imagined the outcome to be. It was often too painful to think about a child at the end of it, in case it all fell through. When we did, the child was an abstract concept. With adoption, at first you lose the idea that you are able to shape and create the influences in a childs life, because they are often presented to you as a complete person that you need to accomodate in their entirety, as though their experiences are the sum total of what they are, as though they won't fit and adapt to you. In many ways this is true. Adopted kids often need you to make space for them in a way birth children dont because they grow around you. Its hard to describe how this will affect you, because it will be small things, not the big ones that matter. When we were going through the process, we tried to imagine the type of kid we would be paired with so we cpuld try to predict whether we could cope with those challenges. I don't think that we did imagine our two, because in the same way you probably didn't imagine your life partner doing or saying the things they do, or being in the situation you are, or having the good times and in jokes one does in an intimate relationship, you forget that there could be any other option, and you can't even begin to imagine that the quirks they have and how you will like them (or hate them) because you never thought about it.For example, we always wanted to travel with our kids. With birth kids, we would probably have done it immediately, they would have been used to flying and car journeys and it would have been normal for our family. With adopted kids, we didn't necessarily realise the level of complexity it would entail, but also the random joys that it would bring. Ok, so we need to do social stories about airports, and spend an inordinate amount of money on McDonalds because it is the same wherever you go, and have googled "how to stop a child removing his seat belt at 70mph on a motorway because he is cross you wont give him mint imperials you don't have, no really, why is it illegal to Superglue a seat belt harness together" etc, but then again, they also get obsessed by singing it's a long way to tipperary with so many wrong lyrics it's adorable, look at you like you are incredible for taking them to a museum with buses and make a genuine, unprompted apology for slamming their tablet so hard in their brothers face they gave him a nosebleed. It isn't what we imagined.... and yet it is more.

Adoption is absolutely a lottery, but then again, so is life, so is dating, so is work, etc. You might find The One. You might also find someone who will give you a good foot rub but picks his nose, and you decide you can live with that. Few people are in jobs or careers that are absolutely perfect, more people go to work to earn money to do what they love. What is manageable for one is not for another. I know for sure our two couldn't have been parented by many other families, because their behaviour would preclude it, but somehow we are rubbing along one way or another, trying our best amd making it through to another day. Life is continuing, it is vastly different to how we imagined, but it continues and brings both joy and despair in equal measures. Its also worth remembering that not all lottery winners are happy and not all poor people are sad! Gambles may pay-off in many different ways. I bought a euro millions ticket the other day not because I have much hope for winning but because my grandma and I always played the lottery together, I wanted a reason to walk to the shop and I like the idea that I have a tiny sliver of potential hope in my purse u til Wednesday. Those small joys are important too, even if I don't win.

Unfortunately there is no easy answer, and I don't envy your position. TTC is an emotional journey, and there may not be a "right" answer or time, but rather a "good enough" or "ok for us" time to stop.

Cosmos24 · 03/04/2024 18:48

Thank you guys so much for your replies, they're both really helpful.

@Italiangreyhound - I'm 33 and my husband is 35. We only started TTC 14 months ago, so while it feels like a long time to me (and compared to a lot of my excessively fertile friends), I realise that's quite a short journey/attempt compared to many people.

I've had the basic miscarriage investigations through the NHS hospital (various bloods, 3D ultrasound etc) which were all normal, and we're awaiting the genetic results on the last pregnancy. There are loads of (very expensive and unproven, but possibly helpful) tests available in the private sector, which is what I'm considering. I suppose my question is less about the tests available, and more about how to decide when to transition from pursuing fertility to pursuing adoption.

Do you see adoption as a wonderful thing to consider at any stage as a way to grow your family or is it a last resort option? Given the challenges adoption has (both in applying and with the kids), if you thought there was a reasonable chance of success with bio pregnancy would you keep trying at that? In people's experience, what causes the tipping point between the two options? (I guess for you that was financial)

According to the Tommy's miscarriage calculator I have a 73% chance of success with the next pregnancy, but I also had an 81% chance of success with the one we've just miscarried, and even higher with the two before that, so I'm taking that all with a pinch of salt... You hear of women having 10+ miscarriages and I guess it's just hard to know when to call it a day...

@Torvy Thank you so much for your honest and detailed reply, that is super helpful and interesting. Haha yeah I honestly don't think we could cope with going from zero to 3 kids in one go! 1 or 2 would be the starting point I think, but we would definitely consider adopting a new sibling if the birth mum had a further baby in the future.

That's a really interesting point about factors ton consider that might make us more or less at risk of getting into crisis. To be honest, we don't have a huge amount of support super locally in terms of day to day help, but we have family about an hour's drive away who would definitely fit the bill with your termly mini-break level of support as well as meeting up for day trips ~once/month. We also have friends locally who would be happy to do occasional babysitting if the kids were able to cope with that.

I guess what you're describing in terms of your day to day life is basically the equivalent to most people's family life on steroids. I imagine lots of those challenges would be there with bio kids, but probably not so relentless or excessive. Although thinking about it, I am sure there are tons of parents with bio kids who are in or close to crisis and as you say, there are obviously no guarantees that bio kids won't have their own challenges/neurodivergence/mental health or regular health struggles etc. that would also make parenting harder. I suppose most people just don't really think about what life could look like when they have bio kids, they just kind of bumble into it, where as with adoption you have it really spelt out for you to a scary degree.

Yeah all of those "what if's" are what's going round my head right now. I think because we do still have a good chance at success with bio pregnancy, I'm leaning towards giving that another go, but I'm worried that we won't be successful and will have "wasted" another year when we could be halfway through the adoption process by then... But it sounds like adoption is something you have to be 1000% sure about, and really I don't think I've reached the point where I could say I've given pregnancy a full chance. I guess prior to researching, I just had this romantic idea that adoption would be a wonderful thing where you "save" a kid from a life in care, but actually the reality is a lot more challenging and nuanced than that.

Yeah, you are so right that all of life is a complete lottery. "Its also worth remembering that not all lottery winners are happy and not all poor people are sad! " I love this!

Thank you guys :D

OP posts:
Italiangreyhound · 03/04/2024 23:00

Parenting children can be hard, birth or adopted. my birth child is on the autistic spectrum and has certainly given me some grief. My adopted child is going through a phase of being quite hard at the moment but I love them both equally.

For me the question was really, in the long run, what did I want to do. Personally, I wanted to explore all options for fertility that we could afford and had energy for. We had treatment with donor eggs. Twice. And it failed. I didn't even get pregnant. So, for me I felt the time had come.

Interestingly, ever since my twenties I had wanted to adopt, but having had one birth child, I desperately wanted another. I cannot explain it. At every part of the journey one has to decide if you want to carry on with the treatment and trying to conceive.

How does your partner feel? My husband was ready to go for adoption before I was, but he had to go at my pace, and of course I had to go at his pace. So we had to try and work out what our pace was. It was not easy but I feel we gave everything our best shot and I am happy with my two children, however they got here.

satonmyhat · 04/04/2024 02:51

I'm very early days adopter.
I would say if you want biological children then I think it would be sensible (especially given your ages and the short time you've been TTC) to give yourself time to have exhausted your fertility options.
Adoption is parenting but it's not remotely the same journey that birth parents have.
You need to go in to it ready because it's really hard in so many ways (my DC is not remotely difficult to parent so far) but there are so many aspects about adoption that you can't really appreciate until your child/children are placed with you.

Italiangreyhound · 04/04/2024 13:10

I agree with satonmyhat

"I would say if you want biological children then I think it would be sensible (especially given your ages and the short time you've been TTC) to give yourself time to have exhausted your fertility options."

Certainly, if it were me, I would continue with fertility treatment. Our fertility journey lasted about 5 years, then the adoption journey lasted from application to coming home about 2 years. In many ways "for us* adoption was much easier, virtually free (apart the cost of a medical) where as fertility treatment costs us thousands.

However, for us it was the right thing.

In your shoes I would exhaust fertility guidance and TTC before exploring adoption. Because you do need to be done with TTC before you start the adoption process.

Ted27 · 04/04/2024 18:08

@Cosmos24

just to add a perspective from a single adopter. By the time I was 40, all of my friends had had their babies. I spent a lot of time with them and although I loved them ( some more than others!!) I came to realise that I didnt much like babies, I was much happier around them from the age of 2/3.
What I really wanted was to be a mum, and as I really didnt relish the idea of pregnancy, nappies, teething, then adoption was the obvious solution.

For some people the experience of pregnancy, giving birth, having a baby, pushing the pram - all that really matters. And thats fine - carry on with the IVF if thats what you want.
I agree that you need to be ‘done’ with the idea of fertility treatment and birth children before you start the adoption process. But there are more ways to be done with it than exhausting treatments.

Jellycatspyjamas · 04/04/2024 18:18

I just had this romantic idea that adoption would be a wonderful thing where you "save" a kid from a life in care, but actually the reality is a lot more challenging and nuanced than that.

I think it’s good to set down that idea of “saving a kid from care”, you’re realising it’s much more than that. It’s opening your heart and home to a child who has had a rocky start that may have life long consequences for them.

I didn’t consider fertility treatment at all, like @Ted27 I wanted to be a mum, wasn’t fussed about pregnant and babies and my two were 4 and 6 when placed with me. They are fantastic kids, they gladden my heart and make me a better person. It’s also hard work because their needs are completely different despite being siblings, having the same foster carers etc, so I need to constantly flex my approach to each of them which can be exhausting.

You have time on your side, but it’s advisable not to go into adoption thinking bio kids light come along later - you’ll be expected to come to adoption with no plans or expectations of having bio children.

Gafan · 04/04/2024 20:42

Hi
We tried for 5 years and was considering IVF when I fell naturally but sadly ended up in a miscarriage. Then had one round of IVF which failed.
Hubby didn't want to try again as there was no guarantee at the end we would become parents where as we felt that adoption would be a better guarantee and at the end of the day we would become parents which was the ultimate goal. I also never yearned or felt desperate to carry a baby , feel the kicks etc although obviously that would have happened had the pregnancy survived so adoption wasn't to me a huge change as I didn't feel the sense of not carrying which some women do really need and want.
I was also 37 and older .

I think you can go round after round of IVF if finance and wellbeing allows and still not be successful in that time you're also getting older plus the emotional toll it has on everything.
Then ultimately you may feel that adoption is your only choice .
Or your position allows you to have some perspective you aren't considered old, you also have had 3 miscarriage you will receive investigation and that might determine your journey going forward.
I think there are so many different things to consider that you probably won't receive a definite answer Vs answer but hopefully some different stories and advice to give you food for thought.

Best of Luck for your journey ☺️

satonmyhat · 04/04/2024 23:08

Sorry, when I say exhaust your fertility options I meant explore/consider etc. it's such a personal and private thing and you need to decide what you wish to do/how far you want to go before thinking adoption might be a solution.

I have never wanted to be pregnant or to have my own biological children particularly so I have no idea what grief that not being able to if that if that was your wish. Extended family can also grieve the lost of biological grandchildren/nieces/nephews etc.
I imagine it's incredibly painful and I know that this loss should be processed properly and (in a couple) both of you need to be sure adoption is the way forward, and also when to consider adoption.

I'm a single adopter, so I don't have this consideration. My family/friends couldn't care less that my child isn't blood related which is great.

Couples who adopt are more likely to separate, adoption has all the same pressures of 'traditional parenting' and then a load more on top. If both of you aren't on board or have lingering regrets about not TTC for longer, that's going to be revealed if the shit hits the fan when you have an AC.

Torvy · 05/04/2024 06:55

I was thinking a bit more about this, and I agree with what @satonmyhat says about exploring not necessarily meaning exhausting your options.

A slightly different perspective that might fly in the face of conventional adoption advice: in some way there might also be some peace in knowing that you can say to an adopted child that you chose adoption not because you didn't have a choice to have a child any other way, but because you actively wanted to do it this way. You shouldn't give up TTC before you are ready to accept the outcome, BUT if you did stop just a tiny little bit before you have exhausted all TTC options, then you can honestly say to your child and yourself that you have chosen adoption rather than resorted to it because you had no other option at all. It might make you feel like you have a bit of control over subsequent adoption proceedings because you chose it ,and a bit less desperate if there is a knock back in adoption because you could (privately!) think to yourself that you have one last try even if adoption doesn't work out. When a social worker has really put you through the wringer and you are chuntering away to yourself over a glass of wine about how bio parents never have to prove xyz, sometimes it's nice to have a final alternative option held back in your own mind, even if you know for sure you would never use it in reality!

Obviously you would keep that as an inside thought, as others have said, you do need to be at peace with the idea that your TTC journey is done, but that doesn't mean flaying yourself to the ends of the earth for it just to say you did it. You want to be in a good state physically, financially and emotionally for adoption, and it's ok to say I would rather save a couple of thousand pounds for a potential adopted child than try another round... or vice versa.

I think the thing with adoption is that there is not necessarily a rule book or a "right" time, because everyone's journey is so different and different things matter at different times. We found that as we moved through the adoption process, other options naturally closed themselves down in a way that felt OK, and the more we learned the more we found ourselves at peace with the path we chose. But that can take time, and can be scary, so allowing yourself to genuinely feel all of that and accept it is really important.

onlytherain · 05/04/2024 10:52

My husband and I met in our late thirties and soon had a miscarriage. We both wanted to be parents and the guaranteed option was adoption. We both have adopted family members and friends (though adopted many years ago in very different times), so to us adoption was an easy decision. We did not explore any fertility treatment even though our chances would have been good, but, like @Torvy pointed out, we can say to our children we chose them over birth children and we all feel good about that.

I think you need to be aware that having birth children and adoption are not the same. It looks the same from the outside and of course has a big overlap, but the two are fundamentally different. Your child will be traumatised, there is a very high chance of additional or special needs, there is a birth family, an unknown history without you and so on. You cannot just get on with it like most birth parents. It is highly unlikely that you won't have severe challenges at some point. You will need to research and think deeper all the time. You will be part of a lovely community. You will be questioned, you will need to advocate, you will need nerves made of steel, a lot of empathy, strong communication skills, self-confidence, listening skills, foresight. It is hard to describe, but it is much more demanding. It has taken over my life and I love it, but it takes a certain personality and a lot of dedication I think.

Rosenoire · 05/04/2024 18:34

give TTC your best shot. accelerate all investigations etc and really
hound the medical people to get things looked at as soon
as possible. consider
all options - donor eggs etc. really ruthlessly push on this as your priority now. then if it doesn't work in the next timeframe you
know you have given it your best shot.

then if you take the
leap into adopting you know absolutely you gave TTC your best shot. and that to be a parent adoption was your only shot.
consider fostering too maybe ?

i have an amazing LO. so far very early days and they are doing really well. i was very nervous but i just took each week and each decision one by one. no-one can force you to take a child. you are in control. also to be frank i have been incredibly lucky as my LO has had a lot less adverse childhood experiences than the vast majority of adopted children. but you will
learn what the risks you are willing to shoulder are through the process. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and genetic propensities
are stress inducing - but all parenting birth or adoptive has unknowables. I know many on this thread understand and support you
and wish you all the best as you make this decision. my LO is the best thing in my life.

ifchocolatewerecelery · 06/04/2024 07:19

My OH doesn't remember it but we had a conversation about what our (my) limits were when we were ready to start a family. I got pregnant once that ended with a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks. The whole experience was stressful. We continued trying only to discover we had secondary infertility. We had enough investigations to establish the cause and IVF was the only option to become pregnant again. IVF was where my limit was set with adoption having already been discussed if we still wanted a family at that point. 9 years on we've been through the process twice and our children are 8 and 4. It's been the hardest thing we've ever done and we came close to splitting on occasion due to the impact on our own relationship. We adore the children and overall life is good but certain aspects grind us down.

Cosmos24 · 06/04/2024 16:56

Thank you guys for such thoughtful responses, they've been really helpful. I think we need to take a bit of time out to think about our options, but also to just grieve and process the losses. I think we probably will have a consultation with the private recurrent miscarriage consultant to discuss those options, but need to have a bit of a break first.

OP posts:
Tasha0429 · 11/04/2024 00:18

Cosmos24 · 02/04/2024 20:25

Hi all, I've just joined this site a few days ago and want to start by saying thank you so much for all the honest and caring messages I have read through the adoption threads so far. They have been so helpful, I wondered if I could ask a question of my own...

Unfortunately my husband and I have had 3 miscarriages in the last 12 months, which has been really heart breaking. We had always said we would like to consider adoption as well as having biological children, but I guess we just started trying to grow our family the old fashioned way. Things have been a lot harder than expected and we've reached the point where we want to make decision on how we move forward - do we seek further fertility investigations/treatment or is it time to consider growing our family through adoption?

For years I have been very pro-adoption and always thought we would probably adopt as well as having biological kids. It hasn't been until recently though that I have really gained some level of understanding of the stresses and strains involved - both in the long application process (which I realise is necessary, but is obviously very tough) and then to quote one poster on here, the "lottery" in whether or not you end up with kids who are sadly so traumatised/affected by their poor start in life that their families are in crisis (someone said 1 in 3 chance).

I realise this is a hugely personal question, that no one can really answer for us, but I would be interested in hearing people's opinions/experiences of fertility treatment vs adoption. How did you decide on one over the other (including single adopters considering sperm donor)?

The main reason for considering adoption prior to our own fertility issues was the idea that I wanted to provide a loving home for a kid/kids who wouldn't otherwise have one. Realising they did nothing to deserve their difficult start in life, but fully deserve the best future possible (I meet a lot of people from abusive backgrounds through my work and can see the difference a loving home could make). But now I am wondering a) it seems there are more prospective adopters than kids so is that even necessary and b) if we would be able to cope with the stresses and strains of raising traumatised children - would we be the lucky ones who's kids have manageable challenges or would we end up hopeless/divorced?! There is a very reasonable chance we could be successful at a biological pregnancy in the future, but who knows...

As a bit of background we are both working stressful jobs, but I hope to take a year off (either maternity or adoption leave) and then work 2-3 days/week and am happy to change careers if the current job is too much with kids (either adopted or bio). We have a 4 bedroom house, so could in theory adopt 3 siblings and would definitely consider this, but I suspect 2 might be more than enough to start with!

Sorry I've written so much, I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of this! Entirely reasonably, the local services want 6 months of no fertility treatment/investigations before applying, and it already feels like such a long process, I guess I'm maybe putting too much pressure on us to figure this all out so we can get on with whatever decision we end up on...

Thank you!!

Hi

I've not adopted, I would absolutely love to! I don't have the room right now, or financially in a position to do so, however, I just wanted to say, that I think your looking to deep, if you adopted a child, and have a big heart to do so, you would love them enough to long way beyond any trauma they have, a child with any issues still deserves a loving home, and your love could change their life 🥰 look way beyond any of the what ifs, you could have a bio child and have any issues, but none the less you'd love the unconditionally and I'm sure you'll do exactly the same with any adopted children ❤️

Torvy · 11/04/2024 07:08

@Tasha0429 with all respect, if you haven't adopted it seems a bit strange that you would come to an adoptive parent forum and then suggest that someone is thinking too hard about adoption, effectively minimising the deep concerns that someone rightfully has, and then suggest that love is enough to heal a deeply, deeply traumatised child.

Living with a child who has been traumatised is not as simple as loving them out of it. You can love someone very, very much and still be hurt by their actions, and anyone pursuing adoption in the UK deserves to have a full picture of what they are getting into both good and bad. On this thread there are several well balanced posts about the challenges and rewarding aspects of adoption, the depth of love that people have for their child and how that is shown. It isn't for everybody- love can be turning up to therapy three times a week, being hit in public by your child and twice as muh in private, sending them to special school, going only on holidays where you know they can have certain food, if you are able to go on holidays at all, being isolated from family and friends who said they would support you and a whole lot of soul searching. Some people don't want to or possibly more importantly do not have the skills to navigate this effectively and efficiently whilst also parenting a child. That's OK. Love alone will not give you those skills, you already need to have them. You might also not love your child immediately, so that being the primary driver is not enough to keep a placement going.

To suggest to op that she disregard the "whatifs" flies in the face of the statistics of modern adoption in the UK, and the lived experience of many adopters documented here, and also on this thread.

Unfortunately love alone is not enough, and OP is wise to seek further input before deciding whether this is the right course for her family and any child they might adopt.

Tasha0429 · 11/04/2024 10:21

With all do respect I came across the thread? So because I've not adopted myself i can't comment? You know absolutely nothing about me? None of my background nothing? In my opinion a child needs love and a loving home, regardless of any background or disability! My opinion is still valid! And that is what I believe. Thank you for taking your time to comment purely to out someone. Very disturbing that you have took your time to write a message purely cause you didn't like mine! I'm sorry you feel that way. Have a lovely day ☺️

WittyUsername123 · 11/04/2024 10:27

I don’t want to derail OPs post, but I agree that it is not necessarily helpful to talk about ‘love’ as a panacea to a child’s needs.
Not to sound like Shakespeare here, but what is love? It’s not something you can touch or hold, or something that will magically fix developmental trauma. A ‘big heart’, especially if it encourages the mindset that adopted children require rescuing, may well make adopting harder for you when you find you are not met with the grateful smiles of your imaginings!

Tasha0429 · 11/04/2024 10:41

This reply has been deleted

We are taking this down as it is not in the spirit of the site.

WittyUsername123 · 11/04/2024 10:57

This reply has been deleted

We are taking this down as it is not in the spirit of the site.

Wow.
I have two adopted children and saying this to me is staggeringly offensive.
I wish you healing and greater understanding. Not going to engage further.

Amotherlife · 11/04/2024 10:59

We went through all this 20 to 25 years ago. One thing I would say is adoption is not a cure for infertility nor is it just like having your own children.

Personally I needed to prove to myself that I couldn't have my own birth child. (Like you I had previously had some leaning towards adoption). That meant persevering with investigations and treatments. It was heartbreaking - the worst time of my life - but it was a process I needed to go through. I was your age when we started trying to conceive and around 38 when I accepted there was 100% no hope.

We then went on a waiting list for egg donation but I never really felt OK with that, especially as I knew I'd never want to donate one of my own eggs if the situation was different. After a while we were offered an egg sharing programme- to pay for someone else to have IVF but to share their eggs. The idea of going through the medical procedures all over again, knowing it wasn't guaranteed we'd be successful, decided it for me - adoption was the route we would take.

So by that time we fully accepted we couldn't have a child of our own and we understood the issues associated with adopting. We felt we were good candidates and felt confident we would have a child / children placed and that we would make resilient parents. We felt more in control of our life again. Plus, although we were both around 40 by then, we knew that wasn't old in adoption terms. We now have two grown children - neither have been easy to parent but they are definitely our children and overall, the rewards have been amazing. But you certainly need to do your research and I do know many people who have experienced huge struggles with their adoptees.

You also, IMO, need to accept you can't have birth children- you are nowhere near that yet.

Amotherlife · 11/04/2024 11:01

Torvy · 11/04/2024 07:08

@Tasha0429 with all respect, if you haven't adopted it seems a bit strange that you would come to an adoptive parent forum and then suggest that someone is thinking too hard about adoption, effectively minimising the deep concerns that someone rightfully has, and then suggest that love is enough to heal a deeply, deeply traumatised child.

Living with a child who has been traumatised is not as simple as loving them out of it. You can love someone very, very much and still be hurt by their actions, and anyone pursuing adoption in the UK deserves to have a full picture of what they are getting into both good and bad. On this thread there are several well balanced posts about the challenges and rewarding aspects of adoption, the depth of love that people have for their child and how that is shown. It isn't for everybody- love can be turning up to therapy three times a week, being hit in public by your child and twice as muh in private, sending them to special school, going only on holidays where you know they can have certain food, if you are able to go on holidays at all, being isolated from family and friends who said they would support you and a whole lot of soul searching. Some people don't want to or possibly more importantly do not have the skills to navigate this effectively and efficiently whilst also parenting a child. That's OK. Love alone will not give you those skills, you already need to have them. You might also not love your child immediately, so that being the primary driver is not enough to keep a placement going.

To suggest to op that she disregard the "whatifs" flies in the face of the statistics of modern adoption in the UK, and the lived experience of many adopters documented here, and also on this thread.

Unfortunately love alone is not enough, and OP is wise to seek further input before deciding whether this is the right course for her family and any child they might adopt.

This 100%.

Amotherlife · 11/04/2024 11:12

onlytherain · 05/04/2024 10:52

My husband and I met in our late thirties and soon had a miscarriage. We both wanted to be parents and the guaranteed option was adoption. We both have adopted family members and friends (though adopted many years ago in very different times), so to us adoption was an easy decision. We did not explore any fertility treatment even though our chances would have been good, but, like @Torvy pointed out, we can say to our children we chose them over birth children and we all feel good about that.

I think you need to be aware that having birth children and adoption are not the same. It looks the same from the outside and of course has a big overlap, but the two are fundamentally different. Your child will be traumatised, there is a very high chance of additional or special needs, there is a birth family, an unknown history without you and so on. You cannot just get on with it like most birth parents. It is highly unlikely that you won't have severe challenges at some point. You will need to research and think deeper all the time. You will be part of a lovely community. You will be questioned, you will need to advocate, you will need nerves made of steel, a lot of empathy, strong communication skills, self-confidence, listening skills, foresight. It is hard to describe, but it is much more demanding. It has taken over my life and I love it, but it takes a certain personality and a lot of dedication I think.

Totally agree with this. It does take a certain type of person. As an adopter I sometimes met prospective adopters who simply didn't have a clue. One persevered in attempting to take on a child, and the placement broke down within months. And she wasn't the only person I knew this happened to - sometimes early on in the placement, sometimes many years later. There were people who said their adoptees were fine, only to hit puberty and realise that was far from true.

You have to be realistic - about the challenges you could face (there will be some for any adoptee) AND more importantly, about who you are as a person - and who your partner is. Many couples end up separating. The stress these children can place you under can be monumental. It's not that you don't love them nor, necessarily, that they don't love you. Although even that can be hard - it took me two years to truly love one of mine, but there was no way I would ever have given up on them. On the plus side, little steps become huge accomplishments- you need to take an overall positive view to see your way through the chaos.

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