Since she was 5 my daughter has been very vocal that she DOESN'T want any letters from birth parents, she doesn't want to read them, she won't write, she doesn't want me to tell them about her and absolutely NO photos. I respect that.
The birth parents letters aren't great. The Birth father is sporadic, often nothing at all. The birth mum is ....😕Not good. Just a list of personal questions followed by instructions on who to be. Honestly I don't blame kiddo at all for wanting to ignore.
The first few years I sent thoughtful updates and asked if there was anything they'd like kiddo to know about them or her early months. They never shared anything personal. Nothing. They are strangers to us, other than what we were told during the adoption process.
We know my daughters siblings from same birth mum and they have had a horrible time with contact, really nasty mind games as soon as kids engaged themselves (not mum writing).
In light of that I am even more resolved in respecting my daughters wishes, especially as she has additional needs including anxiety.
Today we received a letter from the Letterbox office asking if we are aware of the 2002 children's act and do we understand letterbox contact, why hasn't there been any. I've told them it distresses my daughter, that whilst we will keep any letters we received for her and accommodate any request she makes in future to reinstate contact, we don't feel this is beneficial to her (she is 10).
Surely they can't enforce letterbox contact can they? has anyone had any experience of this?