adoption hearing tomorrow

[OurMiracle1106]

just that really. I know it's going to be emotional. Not helped by the fact that I was up most the night being sick and with belly pains.

I know this is security for my son and closure for me but please forgive a falling tear.

I know it's not very original -but you will have good and bad days.Grief is like that. But it doesn't get easier, I promise you. Not today or even tomorrow, but as you look back you will see that you are coping and feeling better.

Are you managing to eat properly and take some exercise? It really does help. .I guessing you don't have a lot of spare£££ right now,but some classes and groups are free to those on low income. Or sometimes your GP can refer you.

You will feel better mentally as you are doing something to look aftre yourself, as well as the social and physical benefits of exercise . And you will sleep better .

I got a referral for the exercise scheme last week so waiting on that. I'm trying to stay busy and I have bought myself a new dress and a new bra (which cost me all of a tenner for both) to treat myself. I am trying to eat well but if I'm honest old habits die hard and food isn't really my strength but I am eating daily.

I don't think we ever really get over anything I believe we just learn along the way how to live with it

I think you are right, you don't ever get over losing a child. But it does become easier to live with . You have been very brave so far and I know you've tried to do your best by your LO. I hope you find the strength to get through the bad times.

That's good news about the exercise referral - I know lots of people feel very skeptical about it, but most participants really love it and continue on aftre the programme is finished . And it will boosts your confidence for starting your course in the autumn .

Well done on eating regularly -remember it doesn't need to be complicated to be healthy - eggs, cheese , fruit, brown bread /rice /pasta , homemade soup if you feel up to a bit of cooking . Try to resist the junk food except occasionally . it will make you feel crap physically and guilty about wasting the money ( well that's how I feel afterwards )

See, I am bosssing you about like you are one of my kids ( big ones ) . I'm sorry you no longer have your own mum to give you a bit of TLC at this difficult time

I think I need a little bossing about. A couple of my friends have popped in one just left he popped in on route to work. My best friend has been nothing short of amazing.

I'm trying to look after myself. And hoping the exercise referral will help me lose weight too

It has been a long and painful week. Which I have filled with friends and things to do. (ive Been out the last three nights) my flatmate has I can honestly say been a diamond. There with hugs if needed tissues and chocolate and a listening ear.

I know I won't ever get over it but I'm hoping with time this pain comes easier to bear and the piece of me that is missing from me becomes less obvious as other things crowd my life though I know there will always be a massive gap and in quiet moments it will be my gorgeous son and the two babies I lost that my mind will wander to and wonder what if?

I think of all of those who have gone before me and I pray to them that when my ds needs a helping hand to find the right way in life they will be there to guide him, and keep him safe because lets face it he won't always listen to his parents will he?

miracle

Hugs to you Miracle.

I have been thinking about you, Miracle, and wondering how you were doing.
I am glad that you have the love and support of good friends xx

I'm glad you have some solid RL support. Take care of yourself

Much love to you, Miracle

Thank you for all your kind words and support.

I have today phoned up my local college and asked about finance and enrolling to study accountancy. I'm going to pop along to the college tomorrow or Friday. I made a decision that I feel part time would be best for me at the moment. I'm waiting on my gym referral to come through and I'm doing therapy as well so I thought that it might be too much to go full time at the moment.

I'm hoping it will get me out and meet new people and new friends and at least I can look back and see how far I have come.

Brilliant, that sounds like a v sensible plan