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Original poster

The Very Beginning

64 replies

djinnie · 07/03/2011 14:48

Hi everyone.

After five years my hubby and I have decided to try to adopt. We are right at the very beginning of the process. I have just sent the slip back requesting a first visit (after two phone calls and a lot of reading). I know we have some way to go. (Understatement).

I have been told there is currently a 3 month waiting list in our LA area for the assessment process.

I was just wondering how people found the first few meetings. Was your SW really supportive. Did anyone have any issues that they feared would make them less attractive to SS?

Any advice or comments you can give would be really welcome.

I already feel like this is with me day and night - always at the forefront of my mind. And I'm already frightened of being rrejected. This is my last chance to be a Mum.

Many thanks

OP posts:
Maryz · 01/04/2011 22:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kewcumber · 02/04/2011 00:16

we none of us have the energy Maryz. I assumed they don;t need to use the toilet becuase they never drink anything. My sw had a cup of tea or glass of water on every visit and never once drank more than a sip... in three years.

thefirstMrsDeVere · 02/04/2011 10:13

Get away! They ask to use the upstairs loo so they can have a fossik around your dressing table drawers and look under your beds.

Kewcumber · 02/04/2011 22:48

they definately didn't look under my beds or I would never have been approved.

Original poster
djinnie · 04/04/2011 08:41

Morning ladies Grin

You are right Maryz I have been having a life. No I haven't really. My Mum has been with me and I have been entertaining her and cleaning like you wouldn't believe. I've had DH at it too LOL. Given this process takes so long I will either have the cleanest house this side of the Pennines or I will run out of steam, they will see I am a slattern and tell me just to adopt more dogs.

I interspersed the cleaning with taking Mum into the big City for some shopping on Saturday and I did get my hair done but given that it is spiral curls I'll never look sleek and smooth. Envy I wish.

Both DH and I work full time so I needed the bulk of the cleaning and tidying done over the weekend and I can just keep topping it up before Friday. I will have to leave work at lunchtime on Friday and dash home and flush my SSon's floaters away! Blush Although if SWs never use the loo that might not be necessary...

I have biscuits! I bought a mixed box thingie. Something for everyone. Even the dogs. We don't drink coffee so will check that we have instant and posh. We do have a million different types of tea though...

I hadn't thought about what to wear Confused I'll just have finished work so thought I'd leave that on.

Hmmm... under the beds.... Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
djinnie · 11/04/2011 11:45

We had our first meeting and it went ok Hmm Fingers crossed.

They will let us know whether we are being put forward later this week so I will let you know. [nervous impatient dreading omg kind of emoticon]

xxx

OP posts:
Maryz · 11/04/2011 13:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
djinnie · 11/04/2011 14:41

phnarr. She didn't say anything about the cleaning and I asked them (there were two) if they would like tea but no!! One of them had a glass of water which she didn't touch! Hmpf. I had my knickers in a right twist about those biscuits.... Grin

OP posts:
MissFenella · 11/04/2011 22:40

Hi djinnie - sounds like we are at about the same part of the process. I had my SW visit today and am very happy (as is DH).

Might get a course in June or November and I guess that is when the fun starts.

Good luck to us both.

Original poster
djinnie · 12/04/2011 15:49

MissFenella - they've put you on a course already? Wah. Why am I still waiting to hear then?

Was this your first SS visit? How did it go? Anything surprise you?

I was asked a lot of questions about my relationship with my S/Kids which hasn't always been good tbh so that worries me.

Yes good luck Smile

OP posts:
MissFenella · 12/04/2011 17:50

No confirmation yet but SW told us those were the two courses they were thinking of for us. Ideally they would like June but Dh has only just given up smoking so they may make us wait. My Dss is 28 so not such an issue thankfully.

No surprises but I have been reading here for ages before finally logging in and posting. It's been a great resource and I feel I have realistic expectations. No drink at all for the SW which I viewed with suspicion......

Which side of the Pennines are you on? I'm near Holmfirth.

Original poster
djinnie · 13/04/2011 08:52

We're in Derbyshire.

No drink at all... Hmm

Well I might get the phone call today. I'm quite nervous....

Hopefully we'll be able to compare notes as we go if it's positive missfenella Smile

OP posts:
MissFenella · 14/04/2011 15:22

Yes, lets keep in touch - it would be good to have someone to share the expereince with.

I'm sure it will be good news all the way

Kewcumber · 15/04/2011 22:18

"One of them had a glass of water which she didn't touch! Hmpf"

Told you - I TOLD YOU! see "Kewcumber Sat 02-Apr-11 00:16:33"

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