Flexible work around school hours - what actually worked for you?

[MumLearningFlexibleWork]

Hi everyone,

I'm a mum of 2 trying to figure out what flexible work really works around family life. I've been researching lots of options that people suggest online and trying to sort what is actually realistic with school hours vs what sounds good but isn't.

Would love to hear - what has actually worked for you? What was a waste of time?

I'm happy to share a little checklist of what I found from my research if it's helpful for anyone else in the same boat.

Thanks so much x

I was a registered nurse and did 1 or 2 nights a week , it worked well I got home in time to do the school run , home , shower , bed and up at 2:30 to do the pick up so about 4/4.5 hrs sleep which was plenty for me even if I was going back to work the next night . Obviously for this to work you need a partner that works regular office type hours or reliable overnight care .

I should add my other advice is not to drift into SAHM assuming it is the only option especially if you are in a job already. We are all influenced by what is the norm in our peer groups. Look for ways to make it work, accept it will cost £££ early days, if you have a partner never talk about childcare fees in terms of coming out of one wage only. You don’t have to be CEO to make work worthwhile.

Childhood is all about long days and short years - my parents generation used to talk about ‘only’ taking a few years out to look after kids but the reality is that the ‘years out’ can make it super hard to get back in
and they are at primary school then secondary before you know it. The ‘pain’ of missing the odd Xmas fair/sports day and being in wrap around hasn’t damaged my child but not having my salary giving security would have.

@Autumnalcloud very good advice. The number of women (and some men) who stay at home while kids are nursery age, intend to go back to work once kids are primary age, and then discover that primary school is the
most difficult time ever to work with kids is mindblowing.
nursery is expensive, but on 50 weeks a year, 8-6.
School? 9-3 if you are lucky, loads of holidays, and you are expected to be there at least twice a term. Reception to year 5 is in my experience by far the most difficult time, and you need a good relationshio with your employer.

Not sure what you are looking for as family friendly. But plenty of jobs are even at non minimum wage. Since Covid, I moved to hybrid and DH went to fully remote. We didn’t need a childminder since year 4. As long as your child is old enough to not bother you. Between DH and I we managed to do all the pick ups and drop offs working full time. The trick is to find either a hybrid job that is close enough to home and short core hours, or fully remote. My core hour is 10-3 with over an hour commute. But DH covers my two days in office. You do need to be senior enough to control your own calendar.

And totally agree with not dropping to SAH if you can. Once they are year 5, they don’t need you to pick up and drop off. It hugely improves my flexibility for meetings because I know my children aren’t coming home to an empty house. But they let themselves in now, The extra curricular also are later in the day. But of mine do music but I only need to take them to lessons from 4pm onwards, which is easy to shift my hours for if I start the day at 8.

Having a good relationship with your manager really helps to get flexiblity.

I work for the civil service, school hours only (currently 5 days a week, so 0.75 FTE, but looking to go back down to 4 days/0.6FTE when I return from mat leave). It’s hybrid working - for most people that means 60% in office, but as one of my children has special needs which means she can’t attend after school club, I have a carer’s passport and go in once a week.