I hate my dogs

[theogcd]

I’m just using this as a space to vent because I can’t post it anywhere else
but I’ve come to hate my dogs.
i have 3, too many for my small house.
when I got my first 2, i had just moved into this house. I actually because a dog walker and it really took off.
i spent all my days with dogs and it was a good laugh.
and then my mental health took a serious turn, I feel like my whole personality changed. I hated my job and my dogs just started to frustrate me.
fast forward a bit, I got put on anti depressants and I became euphoric. Life was the best thing ever and I loved everyone and everything to the max, and I got another flipping dog.
dont get me wrong, the dogs are all well trained, usually well walked and basic care always kept on top of.
but I just hate them. They annoy me so much, I hate the constant licking and looking for my constant attention.
I know it’s my fault, and I feel like a fraud because people know me as this huge dog lover but I’m just not anymore. I dislike dogs in general and the whole culture around them now.
I feel like I could never rehome them because the guilt would be so deep, and I’d be so embarrassed. They don’t have a bad life, but I do ignore them sometimes and get annoyed at them for just being here.
i know it’s not their fault, and I do love them deep down. But I just regret having them and if I could do it over again, I wouldn’t.

anyone else feel like this? Or am I just a complete asshole. Probably!

I used to work in social services and Education and so many examples where the ones who treated their dogs the best were the most abusive and neglectful parents.
It was actually a common thread of abuse we saw, this pattern of letting the dogs rule the roost including taking priority over the children. And being casual about dog mess even when we told them it’s a risk to their child. Or deliberately endangering their child in other ways because they are obsessed with proving to everyone how “not dangerous” their pitbull is when they sit their child on it or something.

Children spilt milk? “You stupid wee cow!”

Dog peed over sofa? Or shit in kids bedroom? “Aww silly Fido didn’t make it out to the garden in time haha”.

I mean of course you will get some abusers who also abuse dogs, but the link there is abuse.

Broadly speaking there is zero correlation between not liking dogs and treating your children poorly.The MN “dog haters” usually don’t own or interact with dogs and therefore
don’t abuse them !

Dogs are typically being abused by dog owners and dog breeders or dog walkers etc (all of whom paint themselves as dog lovers).

That was a totally different situation though and wasnt re home? Someone got a puppy from a breeder, and most reputable breeders have a clause that you can return the puppy to them if you no longer can care for them. In that situation, posters were saying you'd only had the dog for a very short time, returm the breeder, because puppies are much easier to re home than dogs. In this situation, there are 3 dogs fully grown, and they are very difficult to re home. They will go to kennels and be split up. In addition, op is a dog lover. She love dogs. She's worked with dogs for a long time, and actually it's her mental health that's causing it to feel that way. It stands to reason that if she can get a mental health taken care of she'll be able to take care of her dogs. And may deeply regret getting rid of them now. Op, if you tried local dog sitters, have you tried rover?Have you tried borrow my doggy?Just anything to give you some rest.Pite during the day, and we really do need to go back to the g.P or your healthcare practitioner to get some help.

I know it’s my fault, and I feel like a fraud because people know me as this huge dog lover but I’m just not anymore. I dislike dogs in general and the whole culture around them now

A lot of posters are convinced it’s just a blip that can be resolved by meds, but no I think OP is no longer a dog lover.

It’s not just her own dogs annoying her, it’s the whole dog culture.

People can change opinions and preferences throughout their life. My childhood best friend loved dogs growing up and her family had two.

I was surprised to see how irritable around dogs she was as an adult. I asked her about it and she mentioned it was since she had kids she had no time for them.

Unlike OP she didn’t have dogs as an adult thankfully, so it wasn’t an issue
when her attitude changed. Her partner who lived in his own house at the time did have a dog at one point but that was temporary as helping a friend so it went back eventually before he moved in with her. With OP it is an issue clearly since she has 3.

Dogs aside, I would urge you to seek further medical advice, OP. I don't think depression to euphoria back to depression is the correct balance of things mental health wise. It sounds like you might be bipolar and not receiving correct treatment.

While I do think, 3 dogs is a lot for one person, this is the kind of situation where real medical advice is warranted. You've got lots of people on this thread imposing their own feelings onto you, which may or may not be pertinent to your situation. Your mental health is not in a good place and that should be your first priority.

And just to add - even if we do accept her dislike of dogs is caused by poor mental health or medication side effects (and I’m not convinced it is), it’s clearly not something that can be easily resolved.

Experimenting with other meds could even make it worse for a while and overall it could take time to resolve. There’s not necessarily a magic pill.

I know people who have been on meds for decades and still struggle with their mental health while on those meds and the meds and/or their mental health issues forever impacts their relationship with things and people around them.

This is who Op is right now and for the foreseeable future - be it a mental health issue or not - she doesn’t like dogs and I think any advice needs to bear that reality in mind.

Where does the op say that she hates the whole dog culture?All I can see is her talking about her dogs and very much connecting her current, not liking her dogs, to her mental health.She says nothing about overall dog culture and actually talks a lot about how much she loved dogs and built a whole life around them. What I do think, though, is that mental health is not a blip, and the op needs to take care of a self above everything else, and needs to ensure that she gets urgent, mental health care that's tailored to her needs.My post was around.Could she have any temporary relief from her?l Dogs, but ultimately she needs to take care of herself first

I literally quoted where she said she doesn’t like dog culture.

Sorry, didn't read it properly.I see it now!

I despise the comments on this thread suggesting to rehome your lovely dogs just like that. As if there are suitable, loving homes just at the ready!

OP, do not rehome them! They are your family. I’d suggest getting some help to give you some respite. Could you get a dog walker or doggy day care so you get some space?

Honestly, absolutely despise how flippant people are being about rehoming a family pet!!!!

Whatever other exemplary behaviours your dogs exhibit, constant licking and attention-seeking are not good behaviours and can/should be worked on. They can both indicate boredom/stress, among other things. I'd imagine you do already know that, as a trainer and dog walker.

Humans domesticated dogs 15,000 years ago for the purpose of keeping a furry quadruped in the home (and created birth control 4000 years ago)

"Natural" isn't relevant in this context, given that humanity appears to have accepted one for millennia while persistently trying to avoid the other. 😂

Women not wanting 10 kids is not a rejection of motherhood. Dogs were domesticated to do a job and not to be cooed over.

Licking is an appeasement behaviour. When I’m not ok my own dog becomes very clingy I think that thry get thrown when part of the pack is unhappy so want to be near you.

without seeing the dogs it’s hard, but my best guess would be they’re all trapped in a bit of a cycle where the OP is stressed, the dogs are trying to appease and make her feel better but are making it worse and they’re all feeding off each other

Wrong. Companion dogs have fulfilled a different role for centuries.

They don’t know anything else except you, you’re their whole world. And to start ignoring them and doing whatever else you do to them is terrible. Yes you should feel guilty if you rehome, and no doubt the new owners will struggle to look after them after the way you have treated them recently. Either get rid of them as a collective and let them enjoy the rest of their lives with someone who’s going to love them properly or start rekindling with them again.

Why would you get a fourth dog in a small house- pretty irresponsible.

There is someone in my family who has over 30 dogs, this is all in an ordinary three bedroom house.

I think ,op ..
That this is temporary
Your history shows you are definitely a dog person
Peoples personality doesn't change that rapidly as adults
So I think,what ever medication you are on ..it's not working
And I'd ask to try another to try to get yourself back to normal.
Antidepressants making you hyper ,I believe is a sign of bipolar
Also I can relate strongly to what you say
Since I went on ritalin,I'm a million times better with my dogs
It's definitely about getting on the right medication,to get you back to you xxx

You sound like a really warm caring joy to be around. I bet your friend is secretly relieved to be honest

Is it just dogs you are bitter about or everybody And everything else?

I don't like the modern dog culture (crating, taking them shopping and to restaurants etc) but I love my own dogs. I don't think the two things are connected. It's easy to choose not to be a part of the modern way of rearing dogs. I really don't think that's the issue here. It's the depression talking.

OP please do whatever you feel is right for your mental health and wellbeing.

It sounds like you can’t cope with external demand at the moment. Whether it came from DH or DC or elderly parents or your dogs. When we are overwhelmed with nothing left to give it is normal to want to be left alone. But you should address feeling overwhelmed by day to day pressures. Removing all pressures which are also comforts and give meaning and structure to your life is not the solution. Go back to your GP.

Actually we started selectively breeding them as companions and for the purpose of "cooing" during the Han dynasty.
So before Christ.

though you say they are fed walked etc basic needs met it is clear they are no longer getting the love they need. for some reason with your mental health things have shifted, only your therapist could explain this but i think these dogs need love. they need people who will make them the centre of their world as dog lovers will understand, its not guilt making its simply addressing and caring about the dogs needs.