How do I avoid being lonely on a solo trip?

[ThreeMogsAndCounting]

This is going to sound super pathetic, but I am trying so please be kind.

I am single. My relationship broke down just ovet a year ago and i am still grieving it. As part of my attempt to get over it i am doing things that scare me. Here's where i need you to be kind.

I have never been on a trip by myself, barring going to visit friends and one trip abroad with the kids in Feb. That was to an all inclusive resort and lovely though it was, I felt very lonely surrounded by families and couples.

I want to try a weekend away somewhere in the UK. Possibly a B&B.

So i need advice - how do I plan this so im not lonely? I've only ever been away with someone, so the company/entertainment was baked in. Im happy with forests, sea, hills, water whatever. I like walking and running. I dont have a dog. I read, take photos and write poetry. I am an extrovert and get my joy and energy from social interactions.

I really really want to do this for myself but I am pathetically scared of it.

I have been married 30 years and taking solo trips for longer than that! I am also something of an extrovert.
So solo.trips are not just for the unattached or introverts.
My tips:
I usually do city breaks with galleries, museums or art
Podcasts or music while walking, a good book when sittimg
Exhaust yourself in the day and maybe have dinner in your room.
do a guided tour or activity
dont go to a place with large families or lovey dovey couples.

Thank you. Somehow I was thinking of rural type trips, probably because I have a few work trips to UK cities soon so was thinking of something different, but maybe that's not sensible?

You could try going on a holiday aimed at singles so you still get company baked in or plan your time in detail so that you are never not doing something you fancy (doesn't stop you then not doing it so you can go at a slower pace, but gives you purpose).

Otherwise pretend to be an introvert for a night and enjoy the sheer bliss of no one demanding anything of you and freedom to do exactly as you please.

Practice at home, go out for coffees, lunch, long walks, visit a new town etc on your own.

The trip you are describing will be two or three days of that.

Always carry a good book with you so you can escape into it or use it as a prop if you feel a bit awkward .

I am not single and I go away every year on my own, I love it and I think I’ve really grown as a person since doing it.

I still don’t love the evening meal out on my own so I make the day very long and the evening quite short.

You could book a tour in the area you are going to if you did want to do an activity with people, something such a small food tour could work.

Also cinema or theatre trips work well.

I hope you have a lovely time.

I go on rural breaks too, though fewer. I think either are fine.

You quickly get used to it and it's liberating!

Nope, you need a city break where you can join walking tours, food tours etc. I travel solo a lot, am generally happy with my own company, and I can't think of anything worse than staying alone in a rural B and B in the UK!

I think it could work if someone enjoys long walks, cosying up with a book, a pub lunch or two etc.

Does it have to be a solo trip with the aim to spend time alone, or would something like a guided yoga retreat maybe work?

See whether there's a Parkrun in the area you're visiting and go along to that? Stay at a youth hostel with a communal kitchen? Youth hostels aren't only used by young people, and there are many where you can reserve a private room.

I like to go to fairly large all inclusive resorts, there I feel invisible in a good way. Lots of meals are buffets which work well in the evening and then I have a longer lunch at for example a beach restaurant.
I like to book
small tours to wherever is exciting to visit in that country and also go on boat trips.
These holidays really work for me.

This actually sounds good. If i could find a yoga or writing retreat over a weekend that would be better. A schedule and company feels less intimidating.

I took myself out for a coffee today. It was admittedly a tough day (to do with my ex) and I spent two hours trying not to cry in public, so not a great trial run.

Anyone recommend a good one that's not too expensive?

There are different types of solo holidays so the first thing is to to think about what you want.

Group holidays with a mix of singles and those travelling with others. There is a risk of being the only single person but even if you are people will normally include you.

Specific solo departues where everyone is on their own.

Booking yourself where any contact with others will be incidental (my favourite). If you pick a package holiday with tours you will be more likely to meet people to talk to. Coach holidays are good for this.

Activity holidays - either outdoors or art/music etc.

I would also recommend going into it with the attitude tbat if you do find a holiday lonely you can pick a diffefent type next time.

If you were based in a city it could be more worthwhile having lunch that you like the look of. Prices are often cheaper and lots of people go for lunch by themselves. For your evening meals you could pop into M&S and get some lovely things to eat .If you want to be with people it is far easier in a big town or city rather than being somewhere rural .One possibility is if you like going to a pub you could look for somewhere running a quiz as sometimes one group might need someone to make up the numbers or they might not mind you joining in if you ask.

What areas could you travel to, I have seen lots of reasonably priced ones in the UK?

How about a poetry based mini break?

I'd go for something that's organised so you're not trying to fill lots of time. Like a PP said, a yoga retreat or a walking group?

I think letting go of expectations makes space for new things to happen - someties good, sometimes not quite so good, but not usually a disaster.

As an introvert I found it very difficult to make myself get out to things. It helped a lot to reframe it. Instead of 'I am going to X to have a good time' I would think 'I am going to X to find out whether I'm going to have a good time'. Most things I found I enjoyed a lot more than I expected. The ones I didn't were still not failures because I'd found out that that sort of event probably wasn't for me.

YHA often run group walks and seem nice places to stay if you want to meet other people. You don’t have to share a room if you don’t want to, this time of year you can get rooms at a reasonable rate.

I just had a quick look at a website Book retreats.com and the prices seem to be a few hundred so it could be worth looking on there.

i like to either book some kind of activity

https://www.middlepiccadilly.com/

Or find out about lots of events that you could attend. Ramblers, meetup.com and local Facebook pages might have some ideas.

good luck.

Im near to Milton Keynes so kind of smack bang in the middle of the country. Happy to drive up to three hours i think.
I jave some money to spend, but with some big expenses coming up I don't want to spunk a huge amount on something.

A walking tour with others? Do the Ramblers do holidays? Or if abroad, what about the Camino de Santiasgo in northern Spain. Loads of people walk it either in twos, small groups or alone. You can go at your own pace and join or not join with others as you wish.
Somewhere llike St. Ives in Cornwall would be great for a few days - the gallery and cliff walks.🌺

You have missed it for this year but lots of group walks during this https://www.yha.org.uk/festival-of-walking

Lovely but it is in the middle of absolutely nowhere. Nice countryside around, though nothing dramatic. What could you do except have treatments?