Blonde hair favouritism?

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Are blonde haired, blue eyed, white girls still favoured?

I’ve noticed lately that the girls in my youngest sons school with the ‘halo’ effect are still blatantly favoured weather unconsciously or not. They seem to be the ones who have ‘star of the day’ way more than any other group of children. Today a picture of five girls was posted on the class dojo for their brilliant writing and they were all blonde, blue eyed and white surely that’s not just coincidence?

my son was the only one to do the ‘optional’ homework the prize was to read their work to the whole of assembly. He knew today nobody else had done it so was super excited he would ‘win’ only to be told as only one person has entered the class would write their own piece during English and then the class would vote, the blonde haired blue eyed white girl won again! I don’t know if I’m just looking for something as I’m annoyed on behalf of my son or what, does this happen in all schools?

There’s lots of other things I’ve noticed but that’s just a snap shot, is there still a bias towards these children? I’m just interested not wanting to annoy anyone or anything.

There is but also the assembly thing is outrageous. I’d meet or email with the teacher and ask politely that changing the plan like that was confusing and demotivating and that he needs to have the opportunity to read out his work in assembly as soon as possible. I’m livid on your behalf.

What percentage of the class are blonde haired and blue eyed? Depending on where you are it might be just a numbers game.
Not saying you're wrong, just something to consider! I have a blonde haired, blue eyed girl, and we live in Southern Europe, and to be honest I do think she is favoured here - not for things like good work or the examples you mention, but her looks get praised all the time, and I find it really quite uncomfortable. But whenever we go to visit family in the UK I always think that she just looks like half or more of the children in the playground, so that singling out would be much less because it's such a common look!

It completely depends on the demographic but also the awareness and inclusiveness of the school. I’d park the blonde thing and focus on the bait and switch assembly work.

I’d love to mention to his teacher how unfair the assembly project was but it’s just a little thing in a long list of other ways I feel my child has been overlooked. It’s just one of those things now.

There’s two girls who particularly win everything have been star of the day way more than any other child who fit that demographic and it just dawned on me today and I just thought it was an interesting thing id like to discuss.

it’s a fairly mixed area to those who asked about the percentages of each demographic I’d say 1/4 ethnic minorities 1/4 blonde maybe just under, the rest dark haired/mousy.

I think blonde hair and blue eyes are put on a pedestal in general. I don’t really know why.

I would say half of my children's classes are blonde. The other half are a mix of other ethnicities and brown haired/black hair white children. I would also say the 'naughtiest' child in my eldest's class, who everyone talked about despairingly, was a blonde haired blue eyed boy

I haven't really noticed any difference in treatment. Girls tend to be praised more by teachers I think, but their behaviour is often a bit better and their work a bit neater IMO (I have both) which is what the teachers like. But my children have done the same in tests and achieved the same

I'm not sure about blonde hair, but I find blue eyes very beautiful. Mine are hazel, sadly. I think it's well known that good looking people are treated better generally?

I know there is debate about this, with Toni Morrison's the bluest eye etc, but I just genuinely think bright blue is a beautiful colour and looks lovely in an iris

I think often there is a general bias towards girls. I bet they wouldn't have done the assembly thing if it had been one girl.

Every single school play/assembly/performance it is always the girls centre stage

I have blue/green eyes and have always preferred brown eyes because they look warmer and more soulful. Where I grew up 80% had blue eyes so brown eyes were popular. But when we went on holidays I was surprised to see how people marvelled about my eyes. I think it just depends on the demographics where you live.

I think continually showcasing a few kids isn't fair because effort should be celebrated as much as result. I think you are reading a lot into it though. I have twins who are blue eyes and used to be blonde, now brown as teens. One was always celebrated because she was such a good kid. She always listened and tried really hard and was helpful to the teachers. She recently got chosen to represent the school in something. The other didn't give a shit. It's not surprising the first got more prizes and rewards. I would be insulted if someone said it was just because of her eye colour, she worked much harder than anyone else.

I’d have been really annoyed at the assembly thing. To have a child really excited that they’d done this optional work outside of school and would get to read it out should be encouraged.
By all means get everyone else to write it if you want it written. But the child who did it originally should win.

The assembly thing stikes me as odd.

Mine went to very homogenous schools. They were/are blonde and blue eyed (DS's went green by the time was about 6/7). DS got more prizes than DD because he was more confident and his year group was less bright than hers.

Despite attending homogenous schools, as blue eyed blondes, they were in the minority. (London). Dark haired DC got lots of prizes too.

I'm not sure about blond dc but I do think teachers favour girls.

Completely agree. I am a primary school teacher and also the mother of 2 boys. I am a rarity in primary education preferring boys. They are more straightforward and less whingy.

I’ve had the exact opposite observation throughout my DCs’ years at primary (two different schools): boys were always celebrated more and treated with WAY more lenience than girls for things like behaviour.

Not recently but when I was at school in 1987 only girls with blonde hair were aloud to be mermaids in the school play. I was told I had to be a Hawaiian dancer and wear a grass skirt because I have dark hair. I had such a strop that they let me be a mermaid. My mum still has the video. A group of elfin looking blonde girls and solid, awkward looking dark haired me with the thickest fringe known to man. I was thrilled with my costume, blue leotard and a net skirt that shed sequins and sparkly stuff wherever I went.

When I was a child I desperately wanted to have blonde hair and blue eyes. And be called something sophisticated like Stephanie or Danielle. Although now I'm older I feel differently. My son has long curly hair that's so dark it's almost black with blue eyes. I'm biased but I think he looks very striking with that combination.

Bring it up with the school. Any leader worth their salt would want to investigate and do a thorough job of assuring themselves they weren't exercising unconscious bias (or worse). If you don't raise it, people might not self-regulate. I would do it in a heartbeat for my kid. And even if this weren't racially motivated or just 'blondes over brunettes' / prioritising 'pretty people': I'd remind them that young boys need more support and encouragement to care about academics so they need to take that more seriously.

I think what you're seeing is actually a cultural issue we've adopted as white Brits in our efforts to address sexism. What we've done is spend a lot of time making sure we notice little girls and boost their self esteem, while also sort of putting a dampener on our boys so they don't turn out arrogant or worse, violent.

I potentially live in a more diverse area than you (because I live in one of the most diverse areas), and I'd say this is about girls and not just blonde blue eyed girls, as in, I notice the same things as you about awards and the like about the girls generally, irrespective of ethnicity. But once my eldest went to secondary school, and that environment was less diverse than his state primary school, I'd say there was a clear bias towards the fairer, slimmer girls when it came to being the face of the school bar the token non-white people they'd include of which my son was one.

It would definitely be an advantage if you ever wanted to work with Trump .

On the other side of the arguement do you also ever think about a dumb blonde cliche .

Frankly if you have such a bias and describe girls as ''Whingy'' you should be nowhere near a classroom.

You should definitely challenge the assembly thing - I'd ask for a meeting with the head and explain how demotivating it is to do the work asked and then have the terms of the competition changed and his rightful reward, taken away.
Thats very poor teacher management.

Id also have a word about how the same children seem to be constantly rewarded. I'd steer away from saying it's always the blond blue eyed girls - I don't think you are wrong about the bias but I think the school will deny that they are biased and possibly resistant to acknowledging the possibility. But they should be made aware of a need to share rewards and recognise the contributions of those kids who really work hard and try, rather than just picking the same kids over and over again and ignoring the efforts of others.

Well. My DD is now 17, but she was a cute little thing, blonde curls and blue eyes. She has always been a bit of a loon however, absolutely not naughty or unkind though. Sensitive, v motivated sometimes, quirky. Probably ADHD I would say now I understand that a bit more and how it presents in adolescent girls. Picked on a bit and tended towards isolation aged 11-13 ish. Anyway, despite looking like an angel from 3-7, she was never first pick (never Mary in the nativity!) and we waited until JUNE for her to be star of the week in Year 1, and by then she was literally doing extra homework because “surely Miss B will think I deserve it for this!”. My heart broke for her every Friday when she didn’t get it and then she did in like week 31 of the year… there were 31 in her class. It doesn’t always follow looks; personality is a factor and she has always been not ultra biddable, despite wanting to please, and marched to the beat of her own drum. She is utterly fabulous. But has not experienced the halo effect at all.

I really dislike blue eyes, I find them creepy.

Yes. There was an academic essay about why "lightness" is in some way favoured across all societies, not just ones with predominantly white people. We know about white skin favouritism, but there is colourism, and skin bleaching which is awful, in some places.

But on average, very pale white skin doesn't seem to be preferred? And many people use fake tan, so while the palest skin isn't always liked, blonde does seem to be, as you say.

Natural blondes are rare, which is one reason. Blonde is associated with youth and fertility.

It's no longer the case, as it used to be, that all the "heroines" are blonde, like She-Ra, Supergirl and most famous young women.

But I've noticed a lot of people in my friend/family groups who are Black are trying blonde, which isn't something I remember them doing in the past.

Very worrying that you’re a teacher with this attitude ☠️