Who would you like to tell to fuck off?

[TheImpOfThePerverse2026]

I have a very annoying and demanding customer. He's very rich (apparently) but never pays his bills on time. He expects us to jump to his tune and even worse, mis spells my name on emails.

I've found out, he's a chubby little fat man who's 5'2". He can fuck right off

It’s not his fault he’s vertically challenged!

I was going to be wildly unoriginal and say Donald Trump.

Just Putin really. If I ever meet him, I will do it!

If he wasn't such a tight prick I'd let the weeble thing go....

@AnneLovesGilbert i think there will be a very very long line of people wanting to say this to that man

Trump
Putin
Netanyahu
The world would be a different place if power came with conscience.

Donald Trump & Ryland Clark

Colleague. Think she knows everything. Knows very little. Full of self-importance. Certain days it’s just the two of us working in our office and I dread them.

These and a client at work who has been a complete arse

Would you like me to punch her in the face for you?

Mrs Jiff at number 58 (I've changed some details for data privacy). She is a liar, a cheat, she smells and I have proof she dug up my daffodil bulbs

Farage...but I suspect I'll have to join the very long queue.

My "husband"

Everyone except my DC.

What’s Ryland done?

PILS
A couple of colleagues

Johnny in accounts. Who generated a thread of 37 emails querying policy relating to £1.67 on an expense claim that I had approved. He was witholding £250ish from a lowish graded member of staff and had done so for two months. I did better than telling him to fuck off, I sent it to the Director of Finance (same grade as me) and just wrote "FFS can this be sorted out please".

If you can do without him - get rid. It’s the misspelling
name on email that does it for me! Never mind the not paying on time. Entitlement and no respect.

I have a project manager on one of my workstreams I’d like to tell to fuck off. He’s misogynistic homophobe to start, and a tricky liar to boot.

My ex manager, she didn't stay long but caused major damage and ruined a pleasant work place while she was there....a nasty useless vile woman..I used to imagine running her over in the car park....oops..foot slipped on the accelerator pedal...!!

Robert Jenrick, even worse than Farage

Farage, Jenrick, Tice, Trump et al would all get wood at being told to fuck off. It would be meaningless to them. It’s almost their oxygen.
Rylan without the redundant D - is harmless and not worth wasting a ‘fuck off’ on.
If I was to start dishing out the Fuck Offs I’d start with influencers and Double Z list slebs!

It was the PA misspelling of my name that pissed me off. My boss hates him too🤬

The chap who stole a little England flag which I had put in my window box to support the Lionesses in the women's Euro finals last year . It cost 25 pence but it was mine. I saw him on a recording from my door camera - he actually walked past on his smart phone and then came back for it. He can fuck off to the far side of fuck and then fuck off some more.
( I realise this is not of global significance , but it pissed me off 😂)

Oh to put them all on an island miles from civilisation with no way off.
Put them in a survival situation and leave.
Not filmed just consigned to struggle for rest of their miserable lives.

A couple of people at work who are making my job really miserable at the moment.
A near neighbour who regularly shouts and swears in the street and flings her boyfriend’s belongings into the garden (he always returns a week or so later and on it goes on repeat).
A very judgmental and rude close relative but I try hard to keep the peace even when I’m being loudly criticised.

Generally just Ofsted, living with the pressure that has been piled on week after week as the school is expecting 'the call' is ruining my life. Literally we are living and breathing it and cannot relax for a moment. 2 people are already off with stress and I expect another may well follow.