If you had a child after 40, how was your menopause?

[MNChkn]

I was 42 when DD was born, and aged 52 I think I’m done on the menstruation rollercoaster - my last period was April, although I know it needs to be a calendar year before you’re medically considered menopause.

Perimenopause wasn’t stress-free for me, but it seems to have been very easy by comparison with those of my friends.

Some months I experienced horrible menstrual flooding, and for a while I had irregular start-stop light periods that went on for two or three weeks at a time. Shudder. Also bouts of insomnia and low mood (perhaps linked) which was the worst, because I have always been a sound sleeper and blessed to have a cheery disposition. A very few hot flushes, which were peculiar rather than arresting as they have been for some of my friends.

I haven’t needed HRT or any other medication, nor any interventions beyond doubling up with period pants as well as a tampon.

I’ve just been discussing this with a group of friends, and the only one who has had a similarly gentle menopause also had her last one late, at 44.

I’m now pondering whether having children late in life offers some sort of protective hormonal benefit that makes the menopause more bearable.

As an amateur historian, I know that women often had live births into their late thirties and beyond in the years before contraception and family planning. Were women similarly afflicted by the menopause then, and silenced because of taboos; or was it just easier to endure physically, because they had never been on the Pill, and continued to have pregnancies right up until they were no longer fertile?

I suspect that people who are still healthy and well enough from a reproductive health standpoint to have children later in life probably have an equally easy time with perimenopause.

I had my last baby at 37 (which isn’t particularly late), but always had an easy time with periods and my cycles. Perfect 28 day cycles, no period cramps or PMDD or any hormonal issues. Got pregnant pretty much first cycle three times.

I am 45 and I suspect nearly through to menopause now. I had 4 periods last year. So far only one this year with no sign of another appearing anytime soon. I haven’t really had any signs of perimenopause that I can identify. I sleep well. No anxiety, no other issues. No HRT, never felt like I needed it so far. It’s been very easy.

Had my last at 47, I am 48. No signs of menopause although this time round very many symptoms I normally have had while breastfeeding are worse.

Sorry, no mine has been awful. Last child at 41. I was fine for around a year, when impact of the pregnancy hormones completely wore off it was horrible.

however, I am hypermobile and also hypothyroid so was frequently adjusting medication as hormones fluctuated. I think that had a knock on effect with menstrual cycles and they played a merry game of ping pong. The associated inflammation was really hard. Big I didn’t know a lot of what I know now about how to take care of myself. I was on hrt but tbh it hasn’t been as effective as the exercise and eating approaches I adopted after breast cancer. (Had to come off the hrt.)

tamoxifen for breast cancer has actually given a slightly better level symptom control as it stopped my periods. Or I’m post meno, not sure.

Barely noticed menopause, also had fairly “easy” periods. Had second baby at 43. Have a long term autoimmune disease which started immediately after having my first baby at 35 (hence gap)

Not sure this is true, I was very affected in my teens by my periods but after that they have been no bother, as regular as clockwork, conceived first attempts & at 44 still clockwork periods but I am definitely suffering perimenopausal symptoms. I am weepy one day, hate people the next day, I am struggling!

@WarriorNwhat habits did you adopt please?

Last baby at 43. Last period at 48. Pretty easy so far at 52. I wonder if this has been studied. As you say, women would have been having children well into 40s.

Had my last child at 26 and hardly noticed the menopause.

I had a child at 40 and my menopause has been fine. I came off the mini pill at 52 and found it had already happened. Have some joint pain, sleep isn't fantastic but haven't needed any HRT. I was fairly active doing competitive sport until 57. I don't imagine there's a link but it's an interesting proposition.

That’s very interesting. I was 41 when I had my last child and haven’t had any great problems with menopause - just rage and a couple of hot flushes, which evening primrose oil has sorted out.

Had the last of my three children at 41 (first at 37). Hit perimenopause at 51/52 and had last period at 54 (almost two years ago). I went on HRT pronto due to a combination of frighteningly low mood and insomnia (both of which I struggled with to a lesser extent in the week before my periods). HRT cured the insomnia, the aches and pains that had started to creep in and the worst of the low mood, though I had to add in sertraline as well (have had a lot of shit thrown my way in recent years by the not-so-kind furies/fate/gods - take your pick)! Physically and psychologically, I am on the most even keel I’ve ever known, despite said shit and being rather tubby!

Only baby at 43, and menopause wasn't dreadful, although it coincided with a very high stress period of life. Fortunately, now in the rear view mirror.

Last baby at 40. Still think I’m in peri at nearly 50 with regular periods. Physically fine but mood and brain fog issues have been awful and improved with HRT and lifestyle changes.

I did read somewhere that if you have kids later it can delay menopause, no info about if it makes it easier! my younger sister has already gone through menopause but never had kids.

Last child at 42 and very easy menopause at 58… few night sweats and TIRED for a year but that was it.

Horrendous periods, fourth birth at 43,easy menopause (just memory loss)

Snappier and more irritable and hot chest/facial flushes but otherwise fine. Had a baby at 40 and 45. Always had Dreadful periods (pcos) but they seem to have totally stopped now and haven’t had one for over a year. Yay. I’m 55 now.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but if your last period was April you are far from out of the woods. In 2024 I went eleven months without a period then they returned. Currently monthly. I'm 52 and peri started 8 bloody years ago. Sick of it.

I had dc3 aged 42, I'm 47 now and have no peri symptoms, and periods are coming regularly (every month, with a slightly shorter cycle than before). No sleep issues, flushes or any problems staying fit and being active. Periods have always been painless (no cramps or need for painkillers) ditto pg and had easy births staying the minimal time in hospital, breastfed dcs beyond 3 yrs each easily.

Isn’t HRT also good for warding off dementia and protecting your bones?

Last child at 42. Barely noticed any symptoms other than periods stopping. Had several years before persuaded to take HRT as a preventive for other issues for which I’m higher risk.

Really interesting theory OP. Had my youngest at 28 and still absolutely floored by perimenopause. There might just be something in what you say.

I was 39. 53 now and still pretty regular but they're heavier now 😕

Congratulations! Please may I ask you if you conceived naturally? I am trying but no success so far. I’m also concerned about the raising of a baby should I manage to conceive, so I would be really very very grateful for any insight, hints or tips. x

Last child at 41, horrendous perimenopause. Very low moods, once regular periods are completely out of whack, insomnia, frozen shoulder, etc. I don’t recognise myself at all.

Interesting ? Have you looked st research?

Second baby at 45 used HRT patches to conceive and then started to take them again when peri started

both pregnancies v healthy but had massive issue with panic attacks which started as i hit peri at approximately 48 i think