To just accept it and stay in for the rest of summer?

[NoSummers]

Cut a long story short, my oldest is autistic and prone to aggression and lashing out. I’ve tried and tried to take her out, but it’s getting too much for me and I genuinely don’t feel I can cope with taking her out anymore.
The problem is that it can happen completely out of nowhere. There doesn’t necessarily have to be anything that sets her off.
For example, the last time we were on the bus, she was sitting in her seat and absolutely nothing had happened. She suddenly stood up and started screaming and shouting. I went over to her and told her to calm down and that we would get off at the next stop, but she then started jumping up and down, screaming and lashing out.
There was a woman with a pram nearby and I was really worried she was going to hurt someone. Obviously, the bus was moving, so we couldn’t just get off immediately. We had to wait until it stopped and then get off.
There was genuinely no build-up to it. Nothing had happened immediately beforehand. She can just become extremely dysregulated very suddenly, which makes taking her out incredibly difficult because I never know when it’s going to happen.
I’m now at the point where I don’t want to take her out for the rest of the summer. I’m honestly scared that one day something will happen in public and someone will call the police.
I have other children as well, and I can’t constantly be dealing with a situation where this keeps happening with little to no build up.
I feel awful saying it, but I genuinely don’t know what the alternative is anymore. If it means we all have to stay in for the rest of the summer because I can’t safely take her out, then I don’t know what else I’m supposed to do.
Should we just accept this is it now and stay in for the rest of the summer? Shes at an age now where someone will call the police and I don’t want to be dealing with that.

That’s why exactly I suggested support via the EHCP. That way, you don’t need CAMHS to agree to it.

The GP said to ask the school to make a referral and that it usually carries more weight so im going to contact her teacher when she goes back

The other benefits of having provision via the EHCP rather than a normal referral to CAMHS is that you don’t have to sit on the normal waiting list, support can be more frequently and for longer than typically available via CAMHS, and support not usually available via CAMHS can be provided.

Do you know what provision would be given for it? Im just thinking if it might be something they already have at the school she can access it?

Provision is based on needs, so it would depend on DD’s needs, but examples of provision in F of an EHCP can include sessions with a clinical psychologist, therapies like CBT/EMDR/play therapy/music therapy/animal-assisted therapy, support from a mental health nurse, mentoring… Provision in G can include things like more general support from a psychiatrist including things like medication reviews.

Even if the school offers it, it should still be in F. That is because having it in the EHCP provides legal protection to ensure it happens and enables you to enforce it if necessary. In your DD’s case, it is also important to ensure the EHCP matches DD’s needs and the support she requires as part of the phase transfer to post 16.

Ok thanks hopefully I can get this updated on the next AR review.

Tomorrow is monday. In the morning you
Call the duty social worker children with disailities ask for urgent call back
Say they need to arrange agency carers to stay with dd in the house so you can take your other kids out
Or arrange someone to take your other kids out for the days

Still nothing has been arranged, I called them and nothing has been arranged yet, this is coming up to the 3rd week now we haven’t been able to leave the house, can anyone understand why she keeps asking to go to places literally listing off loads of places asking if we can go then laughing? then I say get ready then and let’s go and she says no. Struggling to not think shes getting pleasure out of us being trapped home

When did you contact children’s services?

When you contacted them what was it to ask? Was it to request they provide the provision already agree? Or was it to request updated assessments - a carer’s assessment for you and an assessment by the children with disabilities team for DD? Or both or something else?

Personally, I don’t think DD is doing it on purpose like you think she is. Complex needs are, well, complex and I think it is part of DD’s presentation and anxiety/overwhelm.

You need to call every day to follow up ask when someone is coming to assess
Call your gp as well.