Am I unreasonable for finding a neighbour using the lawn outside my flat odd?

[GardenFlatTheif]

Not posted in AIBU as I know I technically am, but would you do this?

I live in a ground-floor flat in a small block of 11 surrounded by lawned communal gardens.

My flat seems like it was an afterthought. The main building is a rectangle, and my flat has been added onto the end as a smaller rectangle, so it's set back from the rest of the block.

I also don't have an upstairs neighbour, and I have my own private entrance. All the ground-floor flats have a patio and lawn in front of them, and there's also a large lawn at the rear of the property that is also quite private.

Because my flat is on the end and set back, you have to walk around the corner to reach the lawn outside mine or even know there is a flat there at all - as I said, it’s kind of been stuck on and is self contained. A lawn also runs down the side of my flat as well as in front too.

Nobody really uses the space outside mine due to its odd location and even the communal path doesn't lead to it... well, nobody except one person.

This neighbour has her own patio and lawn directly outside her flat, but she seems to prefer putting her clothes airer on the lawn outside mine. There's also plenty of space at the back of the building for hanging washing, where there are not really any windows overlooking - if she's after a bit more privacy for underwear, etc.

I know the gardens are shared, and technically she has every right to but it just feels a bit bizarre - the flat was empty for while before I moved in, so I am wondering if she was using the garden for washing and hosting etc.

She has to go out of her way to use this area because my flat is at the end and isn't connected by the path, this also means she walks quite close past my front door and windows. It's no sunnier than any other part of the gardens, and as I said, she has plenty of space directly outside her own flat.

It's not that I mind looking at washing. It's more that, because I'm the only person overlooking this little area, I start feeling responsible for her stuff. For example, it's on a corner and gets quite windy, so her airer regularly blows over. I've just had to bring my own washing in because it's started raining, but hers is still out there.

Am I being unreasonable for finding it a bit odd? I obviously won’t say anything to her as I know she technically has the right to it, but I just personally wouldn’t and nobody else does too!

You've been nice picking up her blown over washing (don't you have whirlies or lines provided in the communal area)? But I'd just leave her to it, if you keep picking it up how will she even know it blows over?

I’d probably ask her! Why do you use the grass outside my window for your airer instead of the one outside yours?

Well it’s currently blown over and soaked from the rain, we have had a bit of thunder too so I am expected another downpour. I am just going to leave it - but she will know I have seen it all on the floor and i am such a people pleaser so it’s taking everything not to go sort it out.

Or go out when you see her, start pottering around then start asking her nosey personal questions. "Ooh I like your lacy thong, where did you get it, though I couldn't wear it myself it would cut me like cheese wire. Don't you find it rides up your, you know"?

People are weird!

This would annoy me too even though, as you say, it's a communal area so she's allowed to. Maybe you need to get some garden furniture out there, or some nice big flower pots right where she puts her airers!
Or start putting your washing outside her flat, see how she likes that!

It sounds more tucked away and private as only overlooked by you (without a DIAGRAM I’m struggling to picture the set-up exactly) and perhaps that’s why she likes it rather than the other more open expanses that other people might be sitting in, playing football in etc.

I’d find it odd too but I’d ignore it. I wouldn’t be picking up her washing.

Does it stop you using the grass directly outside your flat? Just as they all have patios/lawns outside their flats, this bit outside yours could be deemed ‘associated’ with Number 32 - for that reason I might talk to her.

Do you have a patio directly accessed from your flat?

I too want a diagram 😆
I wouldn't want to be staring at someone else's washing all day! Surely if people visit you, they will assume they are your clothes out there?

Have you ever spoken to her? Next time she approaches with her washing, I'd go out and confront her.
'oh hi, I'm Gardenflat an this is my flat right here. Which one are you in? Have you lived here long? How is the weather?
'Why do you keep putting your washing infront of my window???'

Yeah I see why this would be annoying, I suspect she doesn’t want to look at her own washing and this feels like a private secure place.

I think I’d say to her, look I know you’ve every right, but how come you put it in front of my window?

and definitely don’t pick it up. In fact if no one can see I’d be tempted to make id dirty s few times to make her stop.

Sometimes flats like yours were assigned to janitors etc, so that may explain the layout and difficult access. Are you sure that your outside area is definitely communal? It may be worth checking.

Either way, do not pick up her washing. If she mentions it, deflect your people pleasing tendencies . Also start putting things there yourself to show that you use the area.

Are you sure that your outside area is definitely communal? It may be worth checking.

I agree with this.
And STOP rescuing her washing!

We need a diagram! But seriously, she has found a nice private spot to dry her clothes so you need to make it as not nice as possible. Leave her clothes in the mud, from time to time put out a load of random dirty stuff on the grass like a greasy bike repair mid process, pop out to chat to her every time she goes there. In sum, be more territorial and more annoying and hopefully she will get fed up and find a different spot.

Don't pick up her washing anymore, she Dan see when it's windy and raining. Is there anything in your lease about hanging washing out in communal areas, we aren't allowed to.

I will try and do a diagram lol. It is the most private part of the shared gardens, there is space at the back too which would also be considered a bit more private.

I can’t have much furniture out side as the gardeners would need to shift it when they come and cut the grass, but I have some foldable stuff that I have started leaving out to “claim my space”.

I doesn’t stop me using my own space, i am sat out on my chair now having lunch, just looking at her washing on the floor and thinking how awkward it’s going to be if she came round the corner at this moment 😂

I don't think it's acceptable to place clothes airers or washing lines on communal land. It's blocking the space, the view, it's oddly personal having to look at strangers washing and it immediately makes it seem like you're unwelcome in the space.

Of course I don't mind seeing washing in general but it should be on the owner's actual property. And it's not exactly visually attractive.

Shared communal space should not be used for work, (unless work is just silently using a tech device) laundry, fixing or building things etc. It should be for people to sit and quietly peacefully enjoy their surroundings.

It would irritate me too.
Leave her laundry, if it falls or gets rained on thats on her for not putting it in an easier to sort location

Placemarking for the diagram

If she mentions the washing, just say "Oh I wouldn't touch someone else's washing. " You can add that hopefully it's less windy in someone's the other areas.

What if you start putting your things there? Would it make her use the area closer to hers?

put your wirlie slap bang in front of her window and wait...

I couldn’t care less if someone else’s washing had blown over!

Does she have her own bit of lawn? Could you put your airer on it!?

We had this when we lived on a community abroad. We all had a small patio then a lawn which was in front of all our apartments and one neighbour claimed "their" bit of lawn with furniture etc and used other parts of the lawn for clothes airer etc and to let their dog run up and down. I got so fed up of looking at it I decided to have a word but they took no notice so eventually I took a chair and small brolly and sat reading, ignoring her. She didn't like it and I told her, again, I didn't like her washing and if she moved it I would move my chair but until then she can lump it.
Eventually she gave up when I took my friend with me for a chat right in front of her window. I don't like confrontation but it had to be done.

Diagram for those that asked, the blue star is where I would put my washing - out of the way and not really over looked - if I lived upstairs and didn’t have a patio.

neighbour lives in one of the 3 flats to the left of mine, so has her own patio and bit of lawn too.

As you can see everyone has their own bit in front, the back lawn is used mainly by the people upstairs, you will also see I have a fence down the middle of “my bit” separating the front and back lawn, this is because the back lawn is only accessible via a key fob in the carpark or via communal doors - so is super secure too!

diagram is under review